Amiri of Caro

First Love

The flickering campfire cast Iset's face in warm tones.

They were just high enough in the Black Mountains that Amiri had dared to gather and light a small amount of kindling, enough to keep the three of them warm at night. The blankets didn't quite provide all the heat Yakov needed, and Amiri was scared to death he'd wake one day and find those little hands colder than they should be. His brother dozed against Iset, a comical sight with his mouth hanging open, limbs contorted into seemingly impossible positions.

Amiri's neck hurt just looking at him.

He drew closer and Iset looked up at his approach―somehow she always heard him coming despite how quiet he made his steps, but then, he never really tried to hide himself from her. Three months they'd been away from Caro, and each day Amiri found himself more and more grateful that the dark-haired girl had left with him and Yakov.

He settled down next to Iset and the slumbering child, carefully transferring Yakov to his lap so Iset could stretch her legs. She didn't have to watch over him while Amiri was off making sure no one had followed them to their newest hiding spot, but she did anyway, putting up with all of Yakov's changing six-year-old moods with the grace of someone far older.

And somehow each day, the fondness he felt for her grew beyond friendship―grew to something that he didn't quite know how to name. Or was afraid to. Iset had given up so much for them―what was he supposed to do, go up to her and say: "Dearest Iset, my chest feels like a swarm of locusts are trying to escape every time you smile at me?"

How would she feel then, travelling under the knowledge that she captivated Amiri's thoughts at all hours of the day? That so many times he wanted to reach out and hold her hand, keep it enclosed within his?

He couldn't burden her with the extent of his feelings, not when she had nowhere to go if his affections made her uncomfortable. And selfishly, he needed her. He couldn't spill the innermost thoughts of his heart and have her leave him and Yakov to run from the Dark Hoods by themselves. Iset made the long, gruelling days on the road a bit more bearable, and he couldn't open his mouth and ruin the easy companionship they had with ill-timed words. Yakov would miss her too―he had just gotten over the worst of missing Mother―Iset leaving would break him.

No. In this one thing, he would hold back. Amiri smiled at Iset as she returned and pulled their blankets snugly over the three of them.

"Worked out the pins and needles?"

Iset grinned, rubbing at her legs as she got comfy again. Her hand found its way to Yakov's soft curls,  stroking them in a repetitive soothing motion.

"I love Yakov, but he's as heavy as several large sacks of grain when he's asleep. Can't really complain though; it's so rare he sleeps the whole night through these days." She pressed a kiss to his forehead then burrowed in closer and closed her eyes.

Amiri wrapped an arm around the both of them.

This at least he could have.