less of you ; minchan

iii

CHAPTER 3

for what felt like an eternity was just a few minutes that passed following minho's outburst. after a bit of pacing in the hospital hallway, chan seated himself on one of the waiting chairs outside the room, his knees bouncing in anxiety. the other nurses that hurried to the room had left but the main doctor was still tending to his patient. chan's head hung low, as he absently picked at the skin around the edge of his fingernails; one of his many bad habits that he developed at a fairly young age.

the door opened and chan's head perked up, his body lifting to meet the same level of the doctor who just left the room.

"is he okay?"

chan asked promptly, as the man in the pristine uniform stood in front of him. he chewed on the inside of his bottom lip while the doctor responded.

"we've sedated mr lee, he's asleep for now but he should be awake in two to three hours. feel free to wait for him inside."

chan exhaled in relief. "okay.. thank you doctor."

he reciprocated a faint smile to the older man as he left but even that was hard to do in his current state of mind. he didn't know what to feel, he just knew his thoughts were clustered in agitation, frustration and concern and it was slowly eating away at him, triggering a migraine that he most definitely did not need right now.

the dark haired boy took careful steps when he entered the room, as if the slightest sound would cause the other boy to awaken in hysteria. he situated himself onto the chair next to minho's bed, his eyes trained on the one he loved so dearly laying in content.

chan noted the completely different atmosphere compared to minho's eruption prior. the way he was quiet and still; his arms lay by his side politely; his eyes weren't straining and his brows relaxed on his face. he looked so peaceful and restful but chan knew that his mind and his heart were not. when minho would awaken in just a few hours, that ephemeral peace would mean nothing and the boy would act on impulse as he did earlier.

chan extended his tired hand out to lightly tuck strands of minho's raven hair away from his forehead. he compelled his hands back to his lap and took a deep breath while tears pricked his eyes for the nth time in the past days. waiting for minho to wake up was like waiting for a storm in a drought, yet it still felt like a fleeting moment; time worked in mysterious ways like that.

and now minho was awake, or at least he had woken up. and chan didn't know what he expected minho's reaction to be when he heard the tragic news. he had thought of several scenarios in his head but none of them included minho blaming chan for jisung's death; he didn't want to believe such a thing could happen in real life but in the end, it was just wishful thinking.

maybe minho was just rightfully upset and he blurted random words out in the heat of the moment. or maybe minho really did blame him because after all, they wouldn't have been in that car if he didn't get drunk that night. chan knew his own mind was messed up but now his reality was just as worse and this stupid migraine wasn't making anything any better.

"fuck.. i'm.. i'm so sorry minho."

chan brought his hand up to wipe a tear away that fell against the crook of his nose, his gaze lowered in shame and the skin around his nails slightly bleeding from the constant picking.