★Will I Ever Be...Ok?★(re-creatng, Sorry Luv.)

±Theres Nothing Wrong±

*Deku's POV*

I AM HERE...I AM HERE...I AM-
I quickly shut my allmight alarm clock off. I look up on my oak wood beside table sat next to my Almight themed bed and saw the time displayed on the alarm, its 7:23 am. I sighed and got up out of my bed, stretching my arms above my head, then bending down and touching my toes. 'Well shit...' I thought. I felt the previously made cuts on my once bare now, abused wrists open up. I was wearing a short sleeve a plain gray t-shirt. I had angry red lines up to about my elbow on both of my arms. I wanted to cry. I had forgotten about...everything. I hung my head low while walking out of my Allmight themed room and into a small bathroom. The bathroom had a white tile floor, a marble sink, and a shower with a darker shade of gray as the color of the curtain. I had forgotten to clean up my mess yesterday and gagged when I felt my bare foot touch the dried blood. I looked down and felt a wave of sadness hit me. It was exhausting. I wanted to lean against the black door frame of the bathroom and cry, it made my stomach turn. I wanted to just give up. I felt a warm, and salty tear roll down my felreckled face. I quickly wiped it away knowing I shouldn't start my day like this. 'Stay positive! U have school c'mon izuku!' i thought to myself. I grabbed a Lysol wipe to clean up the dried, crusty blood. 'Thank goodness it didn't stain.' All of my depressing mess had been swept up with the now dirty wipe. The floor looked good as new. I feel horrible though, something in me just doesn't... I think I should've finished myself off awhile ago so I wouldnt of been able to make that mess in the first place. I shouldnt be here right now, I shouldn't be alive. 'No izuku! Think positive!' I i closed my eyes then looked up into the slightly large mirror and smiled a fake smile. I took a breath and realized how awful I looked. I wanted to die, I didn't want to have to see me again. I banaged my now bleeding wrist after i had forgotten to do so last night. I remembered I had to get to school. 'Shoot.' I ran back into my room, ripped my UA uniform out of my small closet not bothering to close the door, and ran back into the bathroom. I changed in what i would've thought was record time. I grabbed my yellow bag that was currently filled with unfinished homework, a few razor blades, vodka, a few text books and my hero analysis notebooks. I threw on my red shoes, quickly tied them, zoomed past my living room, my kitchen, and out the front door onto the tan colored side walk. I kept running as fast as I could not knowing what time it was due to me not bothering to check when I was at my apartment. My running pace was slow for my 'best'. I was running on little sleep and no food. I haven't really felt the need to eat recently. I can go awhile without food. I need to loose weight, and look skinny, like the models. I need to workout and get abs like all the icons. I'm on a Strict diet of just water. Its not as bad as it would seem though. I hadn't realized I had made it to the gates of my dream highschool. 'I don't deserve to be here... It should've been someone else to inherit Allmights quirk. Why am I here...I shouldn't be here.' I cut my own thoughts short knowing I cant act sad around my classmates. I'm not something to dwell on. I'm not something to worry about. It would be horrific, awkward, and just too much for them to know about any of my problems. I mean todoroki has and abusive dad and an absence mother who's been sent off to a mental hospital, Uraraka has not much money, and I think I have a right to be sad? I'm worthless. There's nothing wrong. Why am I like...this? I felt disgusted of myself. I was walking the hallways and stood infront of the 1-A classroom door. Was I late? I pushed open the door to see almost the entire class looking up at from their desks. My heart raced and I gribbed my backpack straps.
"Your late. Care to explain?" Mr.Aizawa said as he slowly turned his head to face the door and looked at me. He seems more exhausted than normal.
"I forgot to set my alarm this morning sir! It wont happen again!" I quickly blurred out, lying to my own teachers face. He glared at me for a moment then told me to sit down. I nodded my head quickly and made my way to my seat. I was walking past kacchan to get to my desk and he stuck his foot out and I fell face first onto the floor. 'Ow..' "midoryia? Are u ok?" Iida had made his way over to me and held out a hand.
"Oh I'm fine. Clumsy me I tripped." I laughed nervously then took his hand. We had the attention of the entire class. My heart was almost beating out of my chest as I quickly sat down, and iida gave a mini glare to kacchan. I hate having all the attention. Especially when its from a group of people. 'I can't even stand having people look at me...what a disgrace I am. I shouldn't be alive. For mine and others sake's.' My other classmates had nothing out so I didnt bother to get anything out but a pencil just in case. I felt a wave of nervous and scared hit me. I didn't know why I was feeling this way. I bounced my leg as fast as it could go making little noise. My heart was going even faster. This wasn't good. I bit my lip in hopes of relief. I bit harder, and harder. It was working. This pain was distracting me from my emotions. I felt a warm liquid run down my chin. I looked down and saw a crimson red liquid drop onto my desk. My breathing sped up. 'Why right now?' Why was i even nervous? Ugh, your such an idiot. My mind was being attacked with questions, and insults of all sorts. I held my breathe. I felt dizzy now, like really, really, dizzy. My vision blurred. The colores of the 1-A classroom faded. I felt my body sway forward then-

It all went pitch black.

A/N~ sooooo? Whatca think? This is my first story so I'm tryna na causious and all lmao. Andddd~ idk I just wanted to use to bold font @-@