Embrace

Chapter 13

The ensuing talks, awkwardness, and cheek burning embarrassment was brief. At least it seemed that way for everyone but Niall, who was certain he would bare the shame for all eternity. He tried to rationalize it as "not all that bad" in his brain. Jess had seen him naked before. Seen him terrified. Seen all faculties of Niall that one would consider their most vulnerable parts. Heck, the three of them had been practically joined at the hip for the passed few weeks. This felt to Niall a different kind of exposed. He felt unquestionably open and unguarded, but resigned to not meet the gaze of either of his companions, noting the considerable ease with which they regarded the subject at hand, and decided then he would do his best not to show how much he was internalising it all.

They had moved to the living room. Nialls apartment wasn't particularly upscale or wealthy like he imagined the grandiose living spaces of Will or Jess with their far better pay cheques. But in the time that had passed it had evolved from the stifling clutter filled rooms of someone who hadn't cleared the disrepair of his former relationship, and into something that resembled a home.

Not a single utility was in disrepair, not a single cupboard hinge squeaked. It smelled of a mixture of cleanliness, scented candles, and the fresh dirt from a number of potted plants that had somehow migrated their way into his apartment. Courtesy of Jess. She had a knack of infecting any space she spent a considerate amount of time in with her personality. Which was to say, she brought life wherever she went. She favoured plants that were stubborn and required little in the way of maintenance unless you wanted to. The roots were strong, the leaves reaching outwards clustered in their competition for space.

All the things Niall would use in an abstract space to describe Jess to a T. Strong. Vibrant and independent.

Niall wasn't like that. No, if Niall were to describe himself in a way similar to a plant he'd probably say he was more like the cluster of flowers you buy from a gas station. Pretty for a day. Maybe two. But then they wilt, forgotten and without roots in a dusty pint glass half full with tap water. That was unless you had a serious green thumb about you.

He happily continued thinking in these metaphors of house plants for sometime in his head space. Looking to Will. Was it horribly soppy that he hoped Will had the green thumbs to his proverbial cheap flower? Maybe he could encourage roots. Or maybe whatever this was would be kept beautiful for just a day longer. Niall resolved that he would happy with that.

Niall was pulled from his train of thought when he heard Jess mentioning it was time for her to go. Guilt ripped through him. Thunderously loud in the silence that had befallen the three. Will said nothing. Neither did Jess.

"You don't have to..." Niall all but forced out through the knot that had clenched in his throat. He suddenly felt like he was losing something rather important in his life, and all because he couldn't resist the sexy man that had promised to never leave.

"Yeah... Yeah I do." Jess sighed with a smile. A flicker of sadness flashed within her eyes, for she too was finding it difficult. She too was losing something here. But that flicker was soon masked with something that resembled pride as her eyes briefly looked at the two men before her. Unknowing in how close they sat to each other. How Will was subconsciously making comforting circles with his thumb on Nialls thigh, like it was second nature for them to look for the other for strength and grounding. She was happy for them, even if she was sad that she had to go, and maybe even a little bit jealous at what they found in each other. But only a little. "The commute to work is a bitch from here. I haven't been to my own place in what seems like forever. I've got a lot to catch up on." She kept rolling off the excuses, partly to convince herself that she needed to go. None of them were fooled by it, but knew that when Jess wanted to do something: she did it.

The good bye was sweet, yet painful. They spent what felt like far too many hours packing the meagre amount of things she had, eager to stall the inevitable end that was hurrying forward with each article of clothing folded into the duffle bag. They never held back in their affection for one another. Hugs, arm touching, tickling. Kisses on cheeks and laughter. Jess had never been quite so smothered in loving attention before. Each point of contact seemed to spread with warmth and linger never quite long enough to cool before another point was made.

So when she had finally made it to the door, she was a brimming mess of nerves, warmth and electricity. They were making her leaving more painful than it needed to be. The hug with Will was all consuming. She buried her face in the crook of his neck, taking the scent of his cologne with heavy breaths while he enveloped her in big arms that made her safe, and happily made her struggle for air as she was pressed into his chest. It was an odd sensation. She'd never felt safety from another person quite like this. Jess was a woman who made her own safety. She made sure everyone came to her to feel safe. So it was strange for this feeling to consume her so fully.

The hug with Niall was desperate. He didn't show a single sign of melodrama, but the way he held on to her spoke volumes through his body. His grip was tight, his breath shallow and restrained, like letting go would be the most difficult thing he would do in his life. Jess couldn't help but feel similar. So much so that when the embrace crept into the unspoken guidelines of awkward in length, she all but gave a single pause for thought at reconsidering whether she should stay. Could she do this? Could she leave? Would they be alright if she left?

Eventually they pried themselves apart. Promises were made never to lose contact again, and that she planned to walk in on the two of them fucking many, many more times. And just like that, she left.

Jess hurried, out the apartment building and down the street. Eager to turn any corner that would take the view of that building from her, lest she look back and break. She was alone. The boys were alone, although they were alone together.

The rest of their lives awaited.

A/N: Nothing else to say here other than thank you for reading thus far ^-^