The Boy with a Death Wish

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Hello,

You may be asking yourself, 'Who the Hell is the writer going to introduce to me now?'

Well I'm here to tell you that you are unable to read the next chapter until you have listened to the most important character of the book talk. But who am I you ask, well let me enlighten you my sad friend.

I am No Name, yes it may seem like a strange title for the person who claims they are the most important character in this book. And you would be right, for in a few short weeks I will be earning the title of Guardian Angel. Yes it is true in a few weeks my blank steel card will have a small engraving on it symbolizing my accomplishments.

Though it maybe the lowest class of angels I am earning this title months ahead of my large class of 157 piers. So, you could say I am rather skilled at my craft. However, my age just may be my greatest flaw for I am only 17 so my life is at its inevitable low point.

But dear reader do not discourage what I lack in experience I make up with pure ambition.

My ultimate goal is to replace my beloved, but inadequate, leader and take the title of Saint Michael the Arch-Angel. His title gives him more power then the pope. And what does he do with all his power you might ask? Nothing, absolutely nothing. It is infuriating!

I digress. My first mission is today and I am being joined by some future subordinates, a high ranking Arch-Angel by the name of Jophiel. As well as her partner a lower ranking and quite dull Seraphim. Our mission is to save a girl from certain death and welcome her to our coven as a new member of the fallen. I know with me at their side, we will succeed.

For there is no other option.

~~~~

I slam my head on the table for the fifth time. I'm sure that in the bright and honestly great smelling coffee shop, I must look completely out of place. I bang my head again attracting the attention of some the patrons of the shop. However, no matter how hard I slam my head I can't get the scene out of my head.

Instead it plays again in my mind. His baby blue eyes, his questioning stare, his firm hand on my shoulder, and finally the look of the door on my way out. 'Jophiel, you are an extremely important figure head of the church and he is a priest. Stop thinking about it! What, are you in grade school again?'

Before I can continue chastising myself further I feel a small tap on my shoulder. The same shoulder he touched not more then 10 minutes ago. I pray a silent prayer it's not him because I honestly don't know if I could handle another encounter with the man.

I look up and sigh in relief. It's just my talkative partner, Seraphim. And to my pleasure she is holding three heavenly cups of coffee and wearing an amused smile. I'm pleased that there are three cups of coffee, but I have a creeping suspicion that the third is not for either of us.

My once delighted face now turns sour as I look over at our visitor. He's young, too young not to be a sure thorn in my side. Added to the fact that he was looking at me with a smug face that practically screamed 'Punch me, I dare you to punch me,' I roll my eyes, sit up straight, take the coffee and stare down the face of my subordinate.

She looks extremely guilty and honestly scared. I don't say a word and simply sip my chai latte just waiting for her to come up with an explanation for the rat she has brought with her.

"Wow Jophi, you really had a tough morning didn't you," she says in her usual peppy tone, "I though maybe you died considering that your meeting was supposed to be at 8 this morning-" I cut her off with a harsh glare and decide that I don't need to explain my tartiness. 'Will this day ever end!?' I plead silently.

"Well, I guess your wondering who our little guest is-," she is cut off by the prick sitting next to her.

"Little is a grievous understatement really," he held out his hand. I silently rejected it by not reacting at all and effectively staring straight through him. He retreated his hand with a judgmental look on his face, and to my disappointment persisted with his introduction, "I am the top student at the academy and will be receiving my Guardian Angel title in a few short weeks. I was sent on this mission by Arch-Angel Gabriel himself,"

My eye brows shoot up and I look over to my partner for confirmation. She gives me a stressed look that confirms what the boy is saying. I wonder silently  'Is this a test or am I being punished?' 

He continues "Though it would have pleased me to go on my first mission with him I am unfortunately stuck with the two of you. Having said that, what I need from you is a perfectly executed exorcism to go on my forms,"

I burst out laughing.
"What the fuck do you mean a "perfectly executed exorcism"? Son do you even know what one of those looks like? Here I'll tell you because obviously you don't get it. The "perfectly executed exorcism" is one where the kid has caught the demon themself has the artifact in hand, and oh ya Jesus is also standing next to them saying 'kid don't worry your pretty little head you won't be damned for coming in contact with a fallen angel! You're fine have a snickers bar instead!'. Or better yet there is no exorcism to be found and I was wrong in my diagnosis,"

"Then let's hope you're wrong," he fires back with a glare.

"Hey guys umm let's keep it down and recognize that we are in a public place," Seraphim says in a hushed tone.

I take a deep breath and look around and realize that in fact we are being stared at by almost half the people in the coffee shop. I shoot a silent warning glare over to the boy that says, 'If you value your life don't fuck with me. Not today,'

I reluctantly go back to sipping my latte when he says something that makes me snap.

"Wow an idiotic Seraphim is holding the reins. Color me impressed," the sarcasm dripped from the phrase into my soul and ignited it like an oil fire.

Hands shaking I stand up suddenly and exit the shop. I hear the bell ring again after a few seconds and whip around to slam my fist into the No Name bastard that had the audacity to insult the greatest person I've ever known. He falls dramatically to the pavement. I fight the urge to kick him and instead haul his ass off the ground and proceed to walk in the direction of the subway. 

I'm trailed by a scared shitless teenager with a now gushing nose bleed and an overjoyed skipping 23 year old.

Oh, I can only imagine what we must have looked like on the subway.

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