it was i, dio ! (DIO x Erinas man)

ew they almost kissed

Joe Goldberg could never✨✨✨-

He was casually hiding behind the tree. And yes that was definitely not his definition of "meaningful things" but hey nobody is perfect.
Well that was at least his opinion but it seems like Erina does believe that Jonathan is perfect.

Wow.

To say he was offended was an understatement. He could not process how her brain worked or if it even worked but what bothered him even more was how obvious Jonathan was to his- wait, I meant Erinas little crush.
So there he was stalking the two while processing why the young Joestar would hang out around her and not him. Yes this was a true mystery. It's definitely not like JoJo constantly tried to include Dio in his plans and adventures.
No, that definitely wasn't the case.

He observed as Jonathan and Erina enjoyed each others company, until, he realized.
Those simps were about to kiss.
"God no, please say sike right now, I beg you."
Was the only thing he could muster, before impulsively throwing a small rock on Jonathan's head and hiding behind the tree again.
Hoping not one of them would be smart enough to figure out that this, in fact, wasn't Jesus telling them to not kiss before marriage.

Lucky for him, the two teenagers were to embarrassed to even bother guessing where the rock came from.
Erina, clearly more flustered decided to distract Jonathan from the awkward situation and jumped into the lake, telling him to follow her.
The young boy laughed loudly and jumped right after her, not caring about the clothes still on him.
The both of them giggled like the pure beans they are and continued on playing in the water.
And of course obvious to the ticking bomb hiding behind one of the trees the couple stayed I each others company, not realizing how much shit will get fucked it the future.
"I don't want to sound rude but I'm kinda relieved your brother didn't come with you, JoJo"
WHEEZE Yeah bitch you wouldn't stand a chance if I were here, well at least if Jonathan knew I would be here with you.
"Erina Pendleton! Please do not say anything like that. I know Dio is a little...well intense. But I'm sure it's not his fault and he will warm up to us eventually, so please give him a chance!"
"Bruh say sike he literally made every boy bully you, I don't really see him making any effort to befriend you."
Jonathan stayed quiet after Erinas remark not wanting to argue. He knew his stepbrother wasn't the nicest to him, pretty much ruining his life, but he swore to treat him like a brotha and so as a brotha will Dio be treated. Of course he wasn't blind, but he also wasn't one to give up easily and he was determined to build a strong bond with Dio.

Oh, that's right, Dio.

Meanwhile the two shared this whole anime angst scene the man of this story tried to control his urge to beat the shit out of Lucifer. Oh didn't he mention? Dio decided to name the useful tree he was so smartly hiding behind Lucifer since they're going to be here for a while, might as well get to know each other.
Oh how edgy he was naming a tree after the devil himself.

All hail Dio the edgylord.

Yikes.

He then decided if he wanted to keep up the joe Goldberg facade he needed to leave now. And as the unproblematic Queen that he is he went back to the Joestar mansion and ran to his room unnoticed.

He jumped on the bed like on of those white Disney Channel (fuck Disney channel I hate it😤)  protagonists and thought about what happened today again.
And well mostly about how good Jonathan looked in his swimsuit and how Erina clearly had no respect towards Dios ass.
His face got red at the thought of her not fearing his name and personality whatsoever and then it was decided.

I don't give a shit how much it takes i will take this simp's man.

Then he skipped the diner like da baddie™ he is and went to sleep dreaming about well- bros being dudes, guys being dudes whatever you call it.✨✨😤😳💅💅💅💅😎👀👀😌😜

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GURL NGL I LOVE ERINA MORE THAN I LOVE MYSELF BUT we gotta remember this isn't about her 😔👉👈
Also wtf I hate DIO he's a dumm dumm motherfucker but go off sis I guess. Okay bye its quarantine my dudes so I will probably spam with chapters at random hours so yah ily bye uabbsnsjsskz
  Sincerely, despacito depressito.😋