Glitch #ONC

Chapter Seven

Luke helped her offload the bags of shopping from the cab of the truck. Peeking in to see if there was anything special for him too.

"Looks like things are looking up for us. I'm so proud of you, I know this couldn't have been easy." She stretched up to plant a kiss on his cheek. "The market is paying extra for eggs, and the crafts lady practically tore my hand off for the baby bundles I have been knitting. I guess she thinks we are due to have a baby boom."

"Well, it was a long cold winter," Luke winked.

Mel shook her head, but couldn't hide her smile. "Have you managed to get your entry in?"

"With a little drama, yes. All signed and paid, I got the notification about confirmation a few minutes ago."

"Drama?" She paused in the doorway and adjusted her grip on the heavy bag of groceries. 

"That lamp you love, it blew the whole house circuit."

She furrowed her brow and marched into the house.

Luke closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He prayed that she would see sense over sentimentality. Cautiously he stepped inside and allowed her to keep her distance. Tears cascaded into the shopping as Mel gripped the counter for support. He placed a hand gently on her back and felt relief as she allowed it to stay there. 

"I'm sorry," he said without thinking, "I threw it out without a second thought; we could have replaced the electrics. I can glue it back together if you want?"

"No," her voice was quiet, full of tears.

"You love that lamp and I just threw it out because it hates me."

She laughed humourlessly, "No it is just a weak point between the two worlds. They probably did it to stop you from being tempted to abuse it."

"What do you mean?"

"I think you are on the path to immersing yourself in this world, the nightmares are getting better, but you are still only a few negative thoughts away from relapse. I'm proud of you, don't get me wrong, but I am still scared of losing you to that imagination of yours."

Luke nodded, unable to find the words to express his emotions. His heart swelled at her love for him, her undying faith in his goodness. He felt the stab of guilt as he thought of her heart; broken in the bottom of the bin.

Mel busied herself with putting away the various supplies. She chewed her lip as she contemplated how much she could share. Her skin prickled with electricity as Luke started to hand her items to put away. 

They worked in silence, neither wanting to pressure the other to speak until it became unbearable. Mel took his hand and gently guided him to the living room. It felt odd, slightly empty, without the stately lamp in its proud position by her side. A sob caught in her throat every time she looked at the side table.

"That lamp was a replica of the one I had back home; before I chose this life. It had been a part of our family for years, I forget the legend of which illustrious forebear earned it from an elderly woman with a penchant for siamese cats."

"Are you sure you are happy to let it go?" Luke readied himself for a bin-diving adventure.

"Luke, please, I need to get it out and I can't do that if you interrupt." She saw him swallow his apology and nodded her approval. "It created a connection between the worlds because I wanted it to be one. The malfunctions often were a message from my mother to tell me things were okay, or that she loved me. It was my way of holding on to the outside. I was a hypocrite. I lashed out because I saw my own attachment to unhealthy things. It is time for me to let go, that life is over."

"I had no idea, I thought you were just one of those odd people with a thing for feeling antiques."

"Stop trying to make me laugh." She barely got the sentence out before she started chuckling, then buckled over with gut-busting laughter before starting to weep into her knees.

Luke moved swiftly to her side and enveloped her in a hug. He worked his fingers through her hair, smoothing the untidy curls back into order. His body relaxed as her sobbing slowed. He handed her a handkerchief.

Her eyes were full of water when they found his. He could see a deep fear within them.

"There's something you should know, I don't know if you are ready to hear it, but if I am to let it all go I need you to know it all."

"Take your time, breathe, I'm here for you."

"For now." Her demeanour shifted. She was no longer the wild and strong Melody he knew, but a meeker, terrified one. It reminded him of a child waiting to be scolded.

"Always." He said it firmly and tried to get her to look him in the eye.

"I think you need to sit down." It took her a moment to find her courage. She swallowed repeatedly, opened her mouth and for a long time no sound came out. Her hands trembled against her thighs, fingers knotting themselves together tightly.

"I chose this life because it was easier, because I was scared." Her gaze was focused about a foot above his head, at the painting of an unknown black stallion. "I was born in the West Kingdom, a small farming town, to farming parents. I went through all the same tests as you and my physical strength and genetics had them assign me as 'brawn'."

"Brawn?" The word slipped out without Luke being able to stop it. He winced at the look he received in reply.

"My phenotype put me in a shortlist for the olympian programme, but ultimately I chose to stay in my village and farm.  I always knew something was a little off, I put it down to me not fitting my role, but I soon realised it was something deeper." Her voice faded out for a second, her skin looked clammy and pale.

Luke was about to speak, to console her when she found her voice once more.

"I was living a lie. I over-acted to compensate for the person I was afraid to be."

"I don't understand."

"In this world, I can be the real me, without the downsides of reality. There are things possible here that are not out there."

"Nothing you could say about 'reality' will change how I see you here. This is all I know, this is all that matters, we're in this together remember."

She shook her head violently, "I'm not a woman."

"Yes, you are," Luke said loudly so she could hear it above her hysterical wailing. "This is the life you want, right? The body you want?"

She nodded, her eyes meeting his.

"Then that is all that matters." He was flung back in the chair from the force of her embrace. He could hear her trying to talk, but her happy tears choked them out. "I love you, Mel. Let's leave the outside where it belongs; outside. We have a fantastic future here to look forwards to, it's only two weeks until the big show."

He stroked her hair, enjoying the warmth of her head on his shoulders and the closeness of her body. She stayed there for a long time, allowing him to lose himself to the scent of her apple shampoo. He wanted to keep her there forever, safe in his arms, but she was already starting to pull away.

"I better get some dinner started."

He was tempted to suggest that he help or take over the task, but he could see she wanted to be alone. He squeezed her hand gently and let himself out of the house. Queenie called him, her hoof beating against the empty food bucket.

"Alright, alright, I hear you. You're hungry."