Forever... Maybe

Chapter Eleven

Hamza had started work a couple weeks ago and I as usual was just at home doing some study study on islamic law. 

Hamza had insisted I should do something to keep myself occupied. There was only so much I could do at home. 

I haven't heard from My parents let alone my siblings. It was disappointing but I had nothing to do, nothing was in my hands only for Allah's. 

Hamza was usually busy now a days and he was coming home late now. His mood would be all over the place but I didn't argue much with him about his mood. I was just trying my best to make him feel better. Nothing was in my hands anymore, nothing was since the day I was married to him. 

The summer was quiet as Hamza was busy finding a home for his family as they were moving back this year and we would be moving in with them. I didn't mind that as I would now be occupied with more people and I wouldn't be this bored. 

I got up to read Asr and then read Quran. I was waiting on Hamza to come home early today because I had a doctors appointment. I was not feeling well for the last couple weeks and I had been gaining very quickly these couple weeks. 

Once done reading Quran I turned the stove on low stirring the the Salan that I had made today. Hamza wanted his food warm and when he comes the first thing he does is wash his hands and eat. At first I use to wait to eat with him but then he lashed out one day and told me to just leave him alone to eat.

Things were up and down every week. I had placed the bowl on the seat he usually sits on and washed the dishes till I heard the door unlock. 

Closing the sink, I made my way to the condo door. 

"Asalamulikum" I greeted Hamza taking his office bag from his hands. 

"Walikumsallam" Hamza replied. 

"I am going out, you have to go to the doctors alone" Hamza said with no utter emotion in his tone.

"BU-" before I could even reply

"Aliha, I have an appointment with someone, just go" Hamza said taking a seat on the table. 

I sighed walking into the bedroom grabbing an abaya and putting it over the shalwaar kameez I was wearing. Wrapping my Beige hijab I put on some light makeup. 

I grabbed my bag putting in my wallet and phone. "Hamza I am going" I told him opening the door. 

I didn't get a reply, I turned around seeing Hamza staring at his phone. With that I closed the door making it to the elevator. 

The doctors wasn't far, I had to take the subway but it was only two stations away. 

I was walking into the subway station, till I spotted someone familiar. It looked as if it was my sister Zara. She had her backpack on. I rushed and tapped her shoulder. She turned around staring at me. 

"Baji" Zara gave me a hug. I felt tears build up. I pulled back after what felt like long hours. 

"Where are you going?" I asked her. She smiled holding on to my hand "Back home, how are you?, What are you doing here?" Zara asked. 

"I am going to the doctors, I am fine alhumdulliah, How is everyone?" I asked looking into her eyes. 

"Baji, it's not the same...Mama doesn't even like hearing your name" She said with a tear slipping. I supressed a smile on my face wiping the tear away.

"It's okay, as long they are okay, are they happy?" I asked walking towards the subway entering the train. 

"Yes, Bhai is getting married they all are happy" I smiled, Knowing that they have found peace.