Amiss

Chapter 28 - Ava

*Author's note: Trigger warning. Please stop reading if you are sensitive to the topic of suicide. Remember, you matter and are loved. Sending you hugs wherever you are in this messed-up globe.*

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I pull away from Trey's lips after stealing a kiss. As much as I'd like to stay kissing him forever, he needs reassurance as much as I need to make sense of the situation. "I don't like that Kyal knows where we live. When he showed up at my Uni, that was the first time I'd seen or heard from him in weeks... since before it all happened." My words seem to smooth over some of Trey's distress, but it does nothing to quell my own. My mum would never give up my address, so I don't know how he found us. It's unnerving to think that Kyal may be following me and telling strangers I'm his girlfriend after what he did. It's just insane.

Trey runs his fingers through my damp strands, reminding me of my plans to blow dry it straight. Suddenly that doesn't seem as important as it was five minutes ago. "Well let's hope he got the message not to show up here uninvited."

"I just don't get it. Why now? Why show up now?"

"I don't know. Maybe he figured that his apology needed to be delivered in person instead of over the phone. Which that reminds me your phone was ringing earlier." Trey's beard grazes my neck as he nuzzles against me. I swallow down the lump in my throat and reach over to my handbag. Extracting my mobile from the clutch, I'm again surprised to see no missed calls from Kyal just two from Letty.

"Ah, it's Letty. I wonder how she pulled up? Brax and her seemed to hit it off rather well."

"Yeah, but Brax gets on with most of the female population. He was a heartbreaker in high school." I roll my eyes to the ceiling. Of course, why can't Letty catch a break?

"Poor Letty, she just needs to find a guy who's neither an asshole nor a player."

"Well, Caleb was both. So Brax is kind of an upgrade. Besides, he could have calmed down in the last two years."

"Yeah, about that, you hinted that you and Brax had a falling out?" I watch as Trey's whole body tenses at my question. "Sorry, I didn't mean to be nosey."

"I want you to know me more, but I guess it's not something I'm proud of..." he begins slowly. My mind races, thinking of possibilities like stolen girlfriends and drunken brawls. I keep quiet, waiting, and wondering if he'll continue when Trey clears his throat.

"Well, I guess you could say that I didn't take my Nans death well... She was my last family member, and losing her crushed me. It was a dark time, and Brax got fed up with my self-destruction. I understand why he washed his hands of me," he murmurs numbly. I blink at him in the dimness, feeling the moisture building in my eyes.

"What?" My voice sounds somewhere between a croak and a sob as I reach over to touch his arm. "Brax gave up on you because you were suicidal?" I whisper dumbfounded by someone's callousness. I feel the urgent need to hug Trey and tell Letty how horrible Brax is right away. Trey shakes his head against the pillow and sighs so heavily like his soul is weary.

"As I said, it's not my finest hour. I was a mess, constantly drinking myself into oblivion. It's no excuse, but I was hurting so bad and looking for a way out. I didn't care who else was hurt in the process." Tears spill down my cheeks at his words and his distant tone. My hand automatically reaches for his, tethering him to me, willing him to stay.

"I'm so sorry you went through that, Trey. I can't imagine how hard that must have been. Do you still feel that way?" I ask as he looks up from the duvet.

"Sometimes. But my medication helps." A sigh escapes him once more and I squeeze his hand encouragingly. "At the time, I couldn't see beyond the black. The world was so dark before, but slowly, colour is creeping back in again." Our gazes lock and I watch as his eyes darken, drawn back to a painful past.