Ashen Heart

Sad times

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Eventually I forced myself to get up from the floor and began to start gathering up all of the supplies we had. As much as I hated the idea of leaving the safety of our apartment, as the saying goes I'd rather die on my feet then live on my knees. I had to get my son to a better place, even if it would cost me my life. I owed it to him. Despite how pissed I was at Aaron for waltzing his way back into my life, I owed it to his daughter too

After all like my own son, she didn't have a mother

No I'm not going into detail

...

Fine- Only cause I've got nothing better to do while I wait for Aaron and his daughter to return

Before this whole thing started, I was married to a well off, but beautiful and kind young woman named Elizabeth Schuyler. We met at a work even for the Law Firm I was working at, and immediately hit it off well with each other. After barely even a month of dating I asked her to marry me, which I was sure she would decline but to my surprise and overwhelming joy she happily agreed with an enthusiastic "Yes!!". I'll never forget how ecstatic she looked (and how radiant she looked in her light blue evening dress)

We married a few months later, or rather eloped. Not many people came, just some friends and Eliza's family at an outdoor venue. It was one of the most joyous days of my life, and another one I will never forget for as long as I live. We got an apartment together, the apartment that I still live in with my son, our son, before settling down into a contented domestic life

I found myself subconsciously moving towards my bedroom mantle where I still kept most of my pictures with Eliza. I carefully picked up one from our wedding and marveled at how beautiful Eliza looked in her wedding dress, her eyes soft brown eyes sparkling in the light streaming in through the trees. I felt my eyes welling up at tears as I set the picture down and looked at some of the other ones scattered about the room, joy in all of them, a joy that I hadn't felt in years

I forced myself to look away from the pictures so I could wipe my eyes. It had been five years since I lost Eliza, but the shock of losing her was still strong, even to this day. Everything just felt so monotone without her, I had trouble moving on, but I had to for Phillip. I went back out into the living room with a shaky sigh before turning to the mantle to find more pictures

These pictures were taken during Eliza's pregnancy with Phillip, and the subsequent baby pictures that followed. I picked one up of Eliza and I, holding a our baby son between us. His curly hair had just begone to grow in and it was a messy mop of curls that were every bit adorable as he was. He was happily chewing his hands in the picture and I let a sad chuckle escape my throat before going to the next photo

This one was a mix of two ultra sounds, when of Phillip, and one of my daughter Angie who was 2 when she died with he mother..

Angie was always a sickly child, slow in development and with a weak immune system, but she was such a happy child. She and Phillip were very close together, and he hated when she would have to leave to go to California for treatment. As much as we wanted to keep her close to us, New York just didn't have what we need, and Eliza's father retired in LA so we decided to do Angie's treatments there

They were flying back when the eruption happened.. and they were right by Wyoming which was the first to fall and the ash disrupted the navigation system causing them to go off course.. crashing into another plane that had been disrupted as well..

I received the call from the airlines the next day and it was the worst thing I had ever heard.. No survivors...

I refused to believe the news for weeks, praying that they were looking at the wrong flight. I tried calling Eliza a million times but none went through and when I finally accepted the news I was crushed. I'd lost my 2 year old daughter and soulmate all at the same time... and my son lost his mother and his best friend..

I wiped my face to try and hide the tears that had stained them before going to check on Phillip to see how he was doing. I found him on his bed... the one he had shared with his little sister. I remember the day it happened, Angie's crib had been in his room and when she was too big for it Phillip begged for them to share a bed. Eliza and I happily agreed, and Phillip stayed with Angie in the same room

When I found him we was looking at a couple pictures he'd had in his room, and clutching the teddy bear close to his chest.. Angie's teddy bear. Phillip had been young when the eruption happened, but he still knew the significance of it all, and what it meant to loose someone permanently

I sighed shakily before knocking on the wall, causing my son to look up at me "Hey bud.. you starting to pack up??" I asked and Pip nodded slightly before looking down at the pictures again "I don't know if I wanna leave Pops.." he said as I made my way over to sit next to him on the side of the bed "I know Phillip... I don't wan to leave either... but we have to, it's for the best" I said as I wrapped an arm around my son

Phillip wiped his eyes before sniffling quietly and leaning into my side "I miss them.." He said quietly and I sighed shakily "Me too bud... me too.. but that's all the more reason to leave right?? They'd want us to live a better and healthier life" I said, trying to make light of the crappy situation we were stuck in (one might call it a shituation) 

Pip nodded slightly before closing eyes for a moment "Ok.. you're right pops... but when we leave.. can I bring teddy and some pictures??" he asked while looking up at me and I kissed his forehead softly "Of course you can Phillip, bring as many as you think you can carry" I said and Phillip smiled softly

"Thanks pops.." He said and I chuckled softly "Of course Phillip.. anything for you"

Anything...