Tell Me A Story

I Feel Ugly

I feel ugly though it isn't new but somehow I feel sick of it. I always search videos from the internet and I've read articles on what do you need to do to be beautiful, fresh and all. Since I was a kid, I was always the ugly cousin, ugly friend and ugly daughter. Whenever my cousins and I will spend time together I feel like I'm the ugliest of all the people. They are fond on wearing fancy clothes and they always look presentable that's why many of our neighbors admire them hmmm especially boys. On the other side, I was there feeling envious. Why do they look like that and why I'm like this?

You see, it's hard and painful seeing people admire and praise their beuty while me being left out. They were always the apple of the eye and I'm the bug on the apple. Time goes by and it's still the same and to be honest it sucks. Nothing ever changes even if I wear beautiful clothes, wears simple make up and comb my hair. People will not notice anything but when I look like a rag they will hahaha how brutal that feeling could be. I'm not fond of wearing make up and fancy clothes but is it the basis of beauty? Maybe it is and sad to say I'm not beautiful. How I wish I am and maybe I can live a happy life just like other people. I have many insecurities, so damn many. Why not? I have every right to feel insecure. I was forgotten by the boy I thought who loves me. My first boyfriend didn't bother to make time to me, to atleast tell me it's okay and I'm beautiful. My friends staring at me as if I look like someone they don't know because of my appearance. My relatives who always stare at me with a disgusting look hahaha damn. I have ALL THE RIGHTS TO FEEL SO DAMN INSECURE.

"People only loves you because of your looks so might as well love yourself since no one will bother to do so."