He wanted to hate her, to shred her faith viciously before he lost himself in her eyes again.
* * * *
Amira had a dysfunctional family, an older brother who was far from the ideal and parents constantly on his case. The stakes are raised high for Am...
Amira still hadn't responded to my last text. Why won't she freaking answer me? This girl was slowly becoming a drug for me, one that I needed more of everyday just to sustain myself. She was an addiction that I never wanted to overcome.
"Damon! I need help with the math homework," whined Tye beside me.
Tye was hanging at my place, so we decided to finish some homework. I looked at his paper.
"The answer's four."
"You're a lifesaver, man," he grinned.
I chuckled.
"So how's Amira?" Tye asked as he wiggled his eyebrows. His eyes were a deep sienna with a healthy dose of mischief.
I gave him a blank stare. "How should I know?"
"Sure, you don't. No guy would spend all his time texting some girl if he wasn't interested in her," he snorted.
"Hey, I don't have to be romantically interested in her," I defended.
"Damon is in a relationship?" my thirteen year old brother, Daniel, questioned as he walked into the room. Like me, Daniel had my brown hair that created waves like the ocean on our head, but Daniel could actually tan. I couldn't.
"I don't have a girlfriend!" I exclaimed. "How many times do I have to tell you that I'm just trying to focus on school right now?"
Daniel and Tye cracked up laughing, holding onto their stomachs as the tremors of a ineffable contentment swarmed over their hearts, a gentle rhythm of guys enjoying each other's company.
I exhaled a deep sigh, realizing there was nothing I could say to save myself from the situation. As the boys laughed, I openly glared at them, crossing my arms over my chest in an attempt to look threatening.
"He really is blind," Tye chuckled.
"I know right," Daniel smirked.
I wished that I could slap them without getting in trouble.
"What are you idiots talking about?" I glared.
"You're denying a very strong affection towards this girl, dude," Tye said while patting my shoulder.
I rolled my eyes, pushing Tye's hands off me. "I don't roll like that. She's just a friend. Nothing more and nothing less," I stated in a confident voice.
"That's what you think," mumbled Daniel.
"That's what I know," I retorted
Daniel shrugged innocently, a smug smile playing on the corners of his lips, emerald eyes glinting like a devil planning a bargain.
"Get out, Daniel," I scowled.
He threw his head in a small chuckle, winking at me as he walked out the door, shutting it behind him.
Once he was gone, I sighed, sliding to the floor and leaning against the side of my bed. Tye sunk down next to me, offering a small smile to ease the annoyance that littered around me from their constant teasing.
The atmosphere between us shifted, a calm that breezed through us from the gentle rush of winds outside my window. The blue curtains flowed, flying with effortless ease. I felt myself move with it, my mood lifting from the stillness of nature.
I couldn't like Amira romantically. We were just friends, something that she made very clear to me. She was a Muslim, I had despised Muslims, hating the cruelty they brought to the world, to me. It wouldn't make sense if I actually fell in love with one.
The situational irony of that would kill me. Guys like me didn't fall in love, especially with Muslims girls. I could not fall in love with Amira. It wouldn't happen.
"Hey, Damon?"
"What?"
"Why are so against the idea of liking Amira as more than a friend?" asked Tye, quickly shifting his gaze to the carpeted floors like he was uncertain of my response.
The question caught me off guard. "I guess... I guess it's just hard to overcome what Luqmaan did."
He scrunched his eyebrows in confusion. "Who?"
"Luqmaan," I winced slightly at the very mention of his name. "He's the guy who hit me first and started all this. He pretended to be my friend for three years, Tye. Three fucking years."
"For what reason?"
"My connections with other people. Luqmaan was heavily involved in some shady things, stuff I shamefully participated in," I sighed, disappointment clouding over me. "I still can't believe what he did."
Tye nudged me again, smiling sadly. "Hey, man. You don't have to tell me everything. I know it must hurt."
"It does."
"But Amira and most of the Muslims at our school are nothing like Luqmaan. You came to our school for a clean slate, right?"
I nodded.
"Well, this is your chance, Damon. You don't need to keep hurting yourself with the past. It's time to move forward."
"I don't know how," I whispered a bit too brokenly for my liking.
"Stop all these doubts with Muslims. You're giving yourself unnecessary amounts of stress. I've lived by them my whole life, and yeah, there were bad apples among the community, but doesn't everyone have that?" he asked gently.
"I've never heard you sound so wise," I lightly joked, trying to lift the mood.
Type scowled. "Really? That's all you got from my deep, moving speech? Honestly, Damon, you give me senior depression."
I chuckled. "Thanks, Tye. It sounded exactly like something Amira would say to me."
"She's right, you know."
I knew Tye wasn't encouraging me to date her or anything because Tye knew as well as I did that Muslims didn't fool around in relationships. Either I was in it forever or for never. Tye wanted me to open my heart to the community just like my mother, but I wasn't sure if I was ready to.
I wanted to change. I wanted to be a man that Amira could be proud of, that my brothers could admire. I wanted to free myself from the chains of prejudice. I just didn't know how.
How could I trust those who have wronged me? They came from the same seedling of beliefs, yet contrasted in their practices. Luqmaan lied with such ease, such poise.
Amira also plays that same role. This time, I was cautious. This time, it would be different. She may not be like Luqmaan, but she definitely wasn't off the hook. No amount of attraction could change that.
Assalamualaikum guys!
I hope you all enjoyed the chapter and please tell me what you guys think of Damon and his 'feelings' towards Amira. Winter break is around the corner so I'll have more time to update.
Remember to vote, comment, and fan ;)
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