The Unpredictable Life of a Teenage Fish

Chapter 2

I’ve been watching DIY videos lately.

It gets my creative juices flowing and I feel kind of hyper whenever people rub their creativity and resourcefulness on me. Apparently, there are two different kinds of creativity, the good kind that bring happiness and joy in the greatest way possible—and it’s legal—and then there’s the bad kind that can hurt people and cause destruction, even in the littlest way.

If your creation involves illegal acts, that’s the bad kind.

I might go to jail for what I’ve done, but at least now I have a really cute, blue and red bow. I also made a white flower with a small gem like thing on the middle. The problem though is the cloth. If I reveal the where I got the cloth, I might do the time.

Other than that, I got to spend a day with my friends though, and I got to play with fire. Ironic, isn’t it? A fish playing with fire.

My story today seems boring because it is. I had a pretty normal day. Basically, Saturdays are just rest days for me. I don’t really have much of a wide social circle. My whole social standing only improved a smidge. Sad.

I wish I have a story to tell you, I wish I do. I think I have one though. It’s about the time I… well, you’ll find out.

FLASHBACK

I groan and slouch on my seat. There’s a test in Christian Living in about an hour and I’m troubled. I have just one unanswerable question in mind;

Will I study or not? I ask myself.

Wow. I want to hit myself. I’ve been sitting here for almost an hour, thinking if I want to study or not, instead of just studying without second thoughts. I’m productive, I think sarcastically.

I’m Azzeeya, the normal and shy girl. I’m nine years old, and I love my quiet life; I’m one of the others in our class. Not to brag but I’m also top three in our class. I’m currently in the fourth grade now, and my greatest accomplishment so far is my innocence and how it’s untainted yet. I feel contented somehow. I have friends and a best friend; I’ve never been bullied. I love being boyish, and since I came from a house of boys, it’s no surprise. I’m clean, as far as I know. But I do know that babies don’t come from storks, and I’m not sure if that counts. So you’d expect that I’d shut my ears whenever I hear things that I’m not supposed to hear.

(A: I absolutely think that my reaction here is completely accurate.)

But no, I just leave my ears bare. That’s why I learn things that I’m not supposed to know.

“Fuck you!” I hear one of my classmates say, and then I see him raise the bad finger.

“Wha--?” I mutter.

My eyes widen. What in the world? I don’t think you’re supposed to say that. That’s cursing! That’s against the rules, I object mentally. My mouth is glued shut and my palms are starting to sweat. I think I must’ve looked like I’ve seen a ghost because he looked at me, raised his eyebrow and chortled. He raises me the finger and my mind went black.

That’s illegal. (Z: Yeah, it’s illegal like how you—[A: Shut up, Z. if we go to jail, I’ll kill you.])

I blink and suddenly I became conscious. I watch him go talk to one of the smart kids in our section, and I know that he’s asking—no forcing—the poor kid to let him copy from his test. With my left hand, I touch my middle finger. My heart’s beating and my mind’s asking, ‘can I do that too?’ Might as well try, I think.

I tried it out once and my heart felt weird. I’ve never done this before. (Z: Nerd.)

I tried it out again, but this time I raised it.

YES! I look at the guy who taught me this wonderful compliment.

And he just laughs at me. Amazing.

The door opens and it was a close-call, my teacher almost saw me flipping the bird. After the quiz, I was able to pass, and we were able to have a lecture.

But the only thing I learned so far was how to offend someone with just one simple gesture.

One week later, I learn another thing.

You see, I’m fond of putting things in my mouth, like ballpens, pencils, a small ruler and even my finger. Whenever I get bored, I chew my hair, ballpen cap and anything I could get my hands on. One normal lunch break, while I was eating my lunch, I hear the boys talking.

They were talking about porn. I hated how it was casual talk for them.

I put my lunch back in my lunchbox, and I try to fight my curiosity. It was after a few seconds or so that I started to eavesdrop.

 “I like YouPorn better.” I think it’s a website, I think. This is very weird. I don’t know what any of those words mean, yet it sounds so normal when they talk about it. “You know, RedTube?” the other one says. My eyebrows scrunched. “Yeah.” The guy answered. They continued to talk like that for almost an hour. I start fiddling with my thumbs and chewing my lips. I feel very uncomfortable, but something’s stopping me from moving to another chair. Then I start to feel tingly; my curiosity is starting kill me softly.

It was then that I started to feel my mind’s slow transition to the land of green. (Z: Green means perversion or something like that)

It was bitter sweet. I didn’t stop listening. And then it was quiet. They were silent. When I checked on them, they were looking at me.

“Hm?” They just shake their heads.

When I looked away, I just heard the vague chuckle of a boy. Out of habit and nerves, I start chewing on my ballpen. I don’t think it was smart thing to do because then I hear him say, “She’ll give me a blowjob someday.”

END OF FLASHBACK

I didn’t know what it meant that time. It was around dismissal time when I found out what it meant from Kailee, and even she was disgusted. I wasn’t that used to obscenity, but I have seen something that I’m not supposed to at such a young age.

I had a friend once when I was four and my most memorable memory of him was when we were in his father’s other office and he was using the computer with one of his friends. I didn’t mind them at first; they were just looking at pictures. I was sitting on the sofa, reading a pamphlet about some military things. Suddenly, I heard my brother and his friends; I glanced at the window for a moment, and I saw him there. But when I looked at the monitor of the screen, I was creeped out. The two boys were looking at pictures of Sakura from Naruto, but she was naked. Yes, naked.

Now that I remember this, I hate how I stood at the window, hiding his monitor from my brother. I know I did it because I knew that they were going to separate him from me, and he was my only friend, without him, I don’t know what I’d do. At that time, I was still too innocent and I didn’t know that looking at nude girls were bad.

Plus, include the fact that I can watch Rated PG shows alone.

To all mothers and fathers—or even mothers-to-be—, when the TV man tells you that a show requires Parental Guidance, you need to obey. If you don’t, your kid will turn out like a drug addict or sex addict or worse, like me.

{#1: Innocence is virginity. If your mind is no longer innocent, then you’re no longer a virgin.}

A/N: It's still the weekends. Not much happens during weekends.

I also added my thoughts now, as well as Z's. If you see something like that again, it means I just had a small conversation with this bitch.

Well.... kay then.

See ya.