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I wake up with an agonising head ache. I hate hangovers, plus I have school so that means Alistar, random people annoying me and probably Toby bickering at me for something I said/done last night that I can't remember.
I push myself out of my bed, which is always way more comfortable when you don't want to get out. I don't go down for breakfast, not hungry, so I just start to slowly and steadily get ready. My phone starts ringing extremely loudly making me clutch my head in pain.
"Hello?" I speak slowly.
"Hi, how are you?" What, this isn't Adira or Thomas or Alina. It's bloody Toby. I sigh before replying,
"I'm great" I lie.
"Sure, whatever. You were pretty drunk last night" he laughs.
"I established that by my banging head ache"
"Well, just wanted see if you were doing okay"
"Okay, can I hang up now?" I ask yawning after.
"Um, sure, yeah" he stumbles. I go to end the phone call before quickly bringing it back up to my ear telling him,
"Oh and delete my number" I then end the call knowing he had heard me.
I must've gave him my number last night or maybe it was Adira. Who knows, but it doesn't matter as he should delete my number. I place my phone down again turning it on silent so I don't almost die again.
I end up with light denim ripped jeans and a big slouchy purple hoodie, this hoodie is so cosy that i don't even care how bad I look in it. I don't put any makeup on because I'm to tired and weak to even pick up the brush. I end up phoning Adira begging her to drive us to school.
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"Hi" I close the car door shut and fasten my seatbelt.
"You're rough" she laughs starting the car. I hum to her remark that I've already heard twice today.
"Did I give Toby my number last night? I turn towards her.
"You tried to give him more than that" she chuckles quietly.
"Awh crap. What did I do?" I sigh.
"I think you should ask him" she winks at me, I roll my eyes and press my head against the window watching the world wiz by me.
We arrive at school and find our friends. Adira talks about the party will I just listen and drink water trying to zone out all the loud noise making me head even worse.
The bell rings and I grab my bag, say my goodbyes and head to art. I decide to just get it over with ask Toby what I said or even worse don't last night to him. I just hope I didn't sleep with him, I'm positive I didn't, I couldn't have. Right?
I sit down collecting all my groups art work that we're working on right now.
We're doing a landscape of a sunset with lots of trees and shades and light. It's really difficult especially when you're trying to paint it.
I notice Toby slip in 10 or maybe even 15 minutes late without getting noticed. Soon most of the class is chatting pretty load so I decide to make this my chance.
"Toby" I whisper. He doesn't hear me and continues his conversation.
"Toooobbbbyyyyy" I extend his name, putting more effect in it for him to hear. He turns towards me with one eyebrow in the air. I tell him to come to here.
"Yes?" He asks me.
I cough, " what did I say last night? To you." I look him in the eye showing him I want an honest answer.
"Well, you um" he stops straight away before looking at me.
"I what?" I rush him.
"I want something in return for this story" he smirks.
"What".
"A bit of that cookie you always have at break, it's looks delicious" I laugh looking at him.
"Seriously? I thought it was going to be a date" I stop laughing.
"Is that an offer?" He smiles.
"No" I answer sharply.
"Well cookie it is" he smiles.
"Sure, now tell".
"Okay, you told me how good looking I was and how much you wanted to rip all my clothes off and touch and feel me. You also said how much you loved me and you just wanted me right here and then" my eyes widen is response as he bursts into laughter, what an ass. I slap him in the arm because of his lie. I believed him.
"Okay, okay," he controls his laughter before continuing, "you honestly didn't say much. You just said how much you liked my brown eyes and mysterious ways" he shrugs.
"Well at least I didn't try to kiss you" I sigh in relief.
"Actually you did. But I refused and handed you over to Adira"
"Oh, um thank you?" We sit there in silence for a couple minutes.
"You can go back over to your friends now, I just wanted to know that" I tell him.
"Bye, see you at break for that cookie" I smile barely, not enough to see.
He's not as bad as I had expected yesterday. He is cute, I'll give him that. And I'm really happy that he didn't let me kiss him, I don't know why he didn't but he didn't.
I really should give people more of a chance to get to know me but I always push them away, I just can't let people in easily. It hurts a lot, having to shut everyone in my life out when something horrible happens, I can never talk to anyone about anything openly. I never have been able too and probably never will be. I'm really fucked up, my life is hard a lot.
My dad died years ago in a crash during winter, he slide on ice and boom. But my mother held herself together for as long as she could, she tried her hardest to be strong for my brother Andrew and I. But soon enough she broke, and she took the whole lot of us with her.
Shortly after her mental breakdown she got extremely sick, she could hardly move to drink or eat, it was heartbreaking to see her like this. Andrew went crazy and his grades gradually went flying down hill. I fixed myself the best I could for my mum and brother. I thought if I was strong, they would be too. But it hardly helped. I'm still strong hoping it will still happen after 1 year and a half.
My mother is in hospital, I had hope for months that it would get better. That everything would just get better. But it never did. We visit her still but Andrew doesn't come along very often, he always says he can't do it, that he can't see his own mother like that. Knowing she'll die soon, he just can't.
So basically my life has been crazy for the past couple years, I'm still holding onto that little glimpse of hope inside me that everything will go back to normal. But it can't. It never will. My life is just falling apart more and more everyday and it's breaking me but I don't show it. I never could, I'm strong. At least I try to be.
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CHAPTER 3. I took so long to update this omg. I'm just so lazy and I always need inspiration to write something but yeah. I hope you enjoy chapter 3 even though nothing happens :)
