Strawberries and Mortality

6-Catalina

(Back to Thursday 2nd period)

I'm trying to listen to Shannon but I can't grasp any of the words she was saying at 100 mph. I just keep going back to what Eli said.

Call me if you need anything.

Bull shit. I haven't felt this conflicted since Levi said he was sorry. Which to clarify was to make up for the fact he threw my cat. Like throwing it in the air. I don't like my cat but I don't want to kill it.

It's just Elija could unpredictably move at any time. Pretty much his due date to leave was like a year and half ago, I can't become dependent on someone that could pack his bags the next day. It just won't work.

Shannon grabs my torso, snapping me out of my daze as she pulls me into a tight hug, her arms resting right where Levi's cut was. She has a habit of bear hugs but I think she opened up the wound. No, I know she opened up the wound because it hurts a lot. I feel a drop of blood run down my back and stick to the shirt. 

Crap. 

White and it's Elis. I mentally groan and I try to cover up the stain with my hand. I feel Elijas stare on me and it's just overwhelming. We've been friends for a while and he's seen me through a lot but I just feel like today's going to be different. The pain comes in waves and it feels like a tsunami hit my back and I wince hard.

"I'm going to the bathroom" I mumble and leave.

I don't care to cry in front of my whole art class and collect the pity they would give me. 

JT passes me and waves, I don't say anything because if I look up to respond he'll see my wet eyes. He turns around and begins to ask something but quickly stops as he sees the blood or at least that's what I'm assuming. His absence of words pushes me to get to the bathroom faster so no one else sees it and questions what is wrong with me.

When I get to the bathroom from what feels like a mile walk I go to the wall where I fucked up my hand. The blood is still there. Typical Paramount. I walk back to the door of the bathroom and lock it leaving the empty stalls all to me. I take off Eli's shirt. It still smells like him. A smile starts to form on my lips before I can catch it. I love the way he smells.

I turn around and look at the cut. Yeah she reopened it. I sigh and go to the stall to try to get toilet paper to dab the blood away from the wound.

Someone knocks on the door and I pray it's not a teacher or someone of authority. I wipe my mascara and throw the shirt back on. The blood stain isn't huge but it's noticeable. I just hope the person doesn't say anything. I turn around and open the door.

It's Eli.

I don't want to feel the shame of looking him in the eyes so I just stare at his feet per usual.

"Hey" I talk in a very quiet voice as if I talked any louder he would get angry.