China x Russia Hetalia

Thinking of you as a final goodbye

(Long chap.)

China's POV:

I can still remember the day. The day I fell in love with him, Rome. We were both still young, aru. But there was one thing different about us. I have always been a full country, he was only a half country.

Half countries are half human. This means he would live as long as he didn't suffer too many battles, or a blade to the heart. I loved him with all my heart. I even knew he was a half country. I was too stupid to keep my distance.

----flashback---

"China! Please accept this rose as a symbol of my love for you!" He said to me leaning on one knee. I tried my best to refuse it but I just couldn't for some reason. "It's my greatest honor, I, Yao Wang, take this rose as a symbol of your love." I took the rose from his hand.

His face light up with joy. "Thank you, princess." He bowed. I am the princess of China, even though I'm a boy. I smiled at him. He kissed my hand as a goodbye for the day. "I'll be back tomorrow, my sweetest." he is so charming. "Till then." I said happily.

He turned around and head to his house. I walked the other way. How could I have fallen for him? Well he is nice, sweet, charming, cleaver, and so much more. I'll see him tomorrow. I walked down the hallway of my palace.

---time skip to the next day---

I woke up at the same time as I always did and did my usual route. Then I went out to fulfill my duties as princess. My assistances by my sides all day. It was around noon when I saw Rome again. "Hey China!" He said with his happy voice.

"Hello Rome." I say back with a smile. "How would you like to come over to my house for dinner?" He asks. I look over to my assistance to see if I have anything important planned. He flips through the papers in his hands.

I wait for an answer. "I don't see anything planned at that time." he speaks up. I smile and turn back to Rome. "I would love to." I am glad to go. He looks so happy. "Thanks you." he says bowing.

---months pasted---

Me and him are relaxing without my assistances in sight while we are in my bedroom, everything is peaceful, something I always wanted since I became princess. Today I have nothing planned, which happens almost once every century. "This is great, aru. I'm always so busy that I don't get a moment of peace." I say happily.

"Oh really, being princess must be very hard." I nod. "I don't even know why I'm called 'the princess' when I'm not a girl." He chuckles and sits up on the bed. "What's so funny?" I asks. "You're just really cute that's all." he says with a light blush.

"Rome!" I blushed more then him. I am not use to anyone calling me 'cute'. I'm use to running around and being loyalty. He just laughs more. I grab my pillow and hit him playfully with it. "Ok ok, I surrender." he says puting his hands up.

I smile then he lays back down and wraps his arm around me. My blush only darkens. "Aw look at you!" He says with his brown eyes on me. "Aiya!" I cover my face with the pillow. I never felt like this around anyone else before. My heart is pounding and I want to stay near him even if he makes me mad.

"Oh come on, China, no need to hide." I rolled my eyes even though he can't see them. I'll hide if I want to. He pulled away the pillow. I looked at him when he actually got the pillow away. "You're so beautiful, China, why do you hide when you blush?" I looked down, trying to think straight. Aiya he makes it hard to think and being so close doesn't help. I don't even know fully if we are a couple.

"B-because I only blush around you, I don't really know why aru I just do." I replied to him. I didn't look up at him. "Well..." I still didn't want to look up at him. "...I think someone has a crush on me." That didn't help! Some time I swear he has no empathy for others! He pulled my chin up with his index and thumb. He makes me look him in the eyes, those brown eyes of his look young and ignorant.

My blush is darker some how. "W-wha... Why do y-you say that?" He smiles. "Well does your heart beat faster when I'm around?" I nodded. Right now it's feels like my heart is skipping beats. Not a beat but at least three at a time. He chuckled at me. "That means you like me as in I'm your crush." I flipped on my side away from him.

I don't like him! Do I? Of coarse not, I can't fall in love and I won't. "China it's ok to have a crush."
"No it's not, aru! Remember the rule, countries can't fall in love." We all agreed to it even though a lot of the countries disobey this rule. "Yea yea, but princess... I actually like you, May I even say love!"

"Aiya!" I still don't face him. my check feel like they are on fire and might as well be. "Please China, look at me." He holds my hand, I still don't look at him. Then he gets on top of me with his hands around my wrists pinning them on the sides of my head and his legs on the outside of my body. "What are you doing Rome!?" He pins me on my back, I'm scared. "China, I am in love with you, I find it impossible to control myself around you, I can never find the right words to say when we talk..." He has a blush and keeps me pinned.

"You're so different from the other countries, they're all idiots and you.... you are the smartest yet most beautiful one I've ever seen, I will wait centuries for you, I will fight for you, I will even die for you because I love you and I have love you for a while and it's driving me crazy now. I can't control my self any longer. Please just tell me... Do you love me back? I'm not asking you to lie or to say yes I just need to know if you truly love or like me back." What is wrong with me? I can't speak or move, my heart is pounding, I can't tell if it's from fear or something else, I have a feeling in my chest that I never felt before, I want to break free but yet I don't, my thoughts are useless because I can only think of taking off his clothing of him.

Get ahold of your self China! Stop thinking like this, you can't fall in love and you know this! I scold myself for my thoughts but no matter what I say to myself I can't stop the thoughts. "I-I-I..." I see his eyes full of hope but yet fear that I will reject him. Maybe I do love him. I sigh and try to control myself. "Please I need an answer." He tightens his grip on my wrists. I know he needs one but I can't be in love.

"I-I can't hide it any more. I love you too, I love that you're so caring, how you seem to focus, how you treat me like I'm a person and not a higher power sure you call me 'princess' but you don't treat me like I'm loyalty, I love when your eyes show your emotion and that you seem to get along with everyone you meet. I love your smile, your eyes, just everything about you. My heart pounds when you're closes and I get this feeling when you touch me. I never felt this way around anyone else and it confuses me. But I love you!" I finally confessed. Now I know the feelings are true. He looks into my eyes and I can see the happiness over flowing him.

The happiness spreads to his face and he give a big smile. He lays on top of me and put his head on my chest, letting go of my wrists. "I love you so much, princess." his blush never left his face neither did mine. We lay there in silents for what seemed to be eternity. It make me happy just sharing space and heat. I didn't felt uncomfortable or that it's awkward but it felt natural. "Princess..." I look down at him. "Will you be my partner, the one love and hold? Will you be my princess?"

"Yes I will." he hugs me and I hug him back. I have fallen for a half country. But we will be fine, he is so nice to everyone and no one would hurt him.

-----present day----
He was my first everything. My first crush, my first love, boyfriend, my first kiss. He was also my first lover. How could I be so stupid? How could I have fallen for him? I still feel a little sad and depressed when I think of him and his brown eyes and bright smile.

(That's it for now sorry it's long but there will be another one like this)