Arranged Baby

Chapter --

Sage's POV

I don't know how long I can act brave before I have a panic attack. I'm waddling behind Taylor to follow him to his car. It isn't long before he realizes I wasn't in step behind him and quickly reaches me to steady me. I want so badly to smile at his acts of kindness but I can hold a grudge for years, ask Sara.
"I can walk you know." I say softly, not meeting his eyes.
"I'm aware." He replies nervously, almost awkwardly and I have to hold back a laugh.
I don't protest when he wraps his arm around my waist, as much as he can without my arm or boobs getting in the way. Pregnancy makes them almost double in size.
"Where are we going? And why did you insist on driving me?" My voice gives no emotion sitting next to him. It takes a lot in me to keep my neutral expression when I want to fist his face and jump him at the same time.
"I miss you." Is all he says before resting right hand on my thigh. I clench my legs together quickly and it doesn't go unnoticed by Taylor. He doesn't look my way, just stirs in his seat and keeps his eyes on the road.
"I bought two cribs." I blurt without thinking.
"I saw." His thumbs swirl circles into my thigh, causing inappropriate thoughts to swarm in my head.
What he's doing brings flashbacks of unwanted memories, bringing my anger back full-force.
"Don't touch me." I seethe, not caring how it would make him feel. I give him a steely glare. Hopefully he feels used, cheap, worthless, or at least unnapreciated. Just like how I felt.
"And why not?" He grunts. "You're my fucking fiancée and you don't want me to touch you! This is bullshit the way you're acting towards me Cara. You're pregnant with my children, which looks so damn sexy on only you, and you want to act like we don't know each other?" He stops at the light and turns to give me a pained expression.
"You're fucked up Taylor. You take what you want and don't even consider how I would feel. You're so possessive and controlling and-" I groan when a sudden pain hits in my lower stomach and I hunch over the seat until it goes away.
"Cara! What's wrong? Are you okay?" Taylor urges frantically, completely unaware of the stress he is causing on the babies and I.
"Taylor..." I growl lowly.
"Cara we need to get you to a hospital! This isn't supposed to happen." He whips out his phone and starts dialing one of his sisters.
"Taylor..." I say a little louder.
"What's your fathers number?! I don't have it on speed dial." He tries again.
"Taylor!" I shout again as another pain shoots through my side. Was that a kick?
"What?!" His eyes wide and voice panicking.
"Shut the fuck up. Your making the babies move!" I squint my eyes shut and wait for the pain to subside. Two babies in one womb can cause some ruckus for sure.
He thrust his hand out to rest on my belly and almost immediately, they settle and I smile triumphantly.
"They can tell it's me cara. You don't need to go through this pregnancy alone." His voice is as soft and soothing as his hands. They work magic and remind me how exhausting pregnancy can be.
"I told you how I feel about that." My voice isn't as cold as I wanted it to be, but I miss him sooo much.
"We need to talk about this cara. There is no way that I am going to let you act like my children don't have a father." He continues to drive with one hand on my belly. His hands are still as warm as I remember.
"What do you expect me to say to that Taylor? 'Its totally fine being a jerk who does what he wants.' I can't live that way Taylor, so don't tell me-"
"Then I'll take them." He says bravely.
"This is the shit I'm talking about Taylor! You do what the fuck you please! You can't, not even for the girl you claim to love, just admit that you're wrong and grow up. You can't always have everything your way and I won't allow it. Drop me off if you're going to threaten me with my kids that I'm not afraid to keep away from you."
I knew I should have punched Selena when she spoke up. Who the hell does she think she is? I don't give a shit if she doesn't know what's going on between Taylor and I, she shouldn't intervene.
"I love you Sage." My breath hitches. "And I'm not saying it to get you to forgive me. What I did was wrong, I know it was wrong, but honestly, I can't go back and I don't know what else to do to show you that I want your forgiveness."
Silence fills the car for a while. I want to say about twenty minutes, but maybe it just felt that long. I don't even know where we're going to eat but that's not what's on my mind as the tears fall freely down my face.
Maybe he really is sorry. I know he isn't lying when he says he loves me, but I don't know how to be sure if he is truly sorry, or just misses me. I don't know why he would miss me, I didn't benefit him in any way. I didn't do nothing but tag along with him wherever he went. For Christ's sake, I don't know why the hell he loves me. I always give him a hard time with whatever I do. I don't like being told what to do, it's last of being raised solely by a man. I won't sit and let him do as he pleases while I sit at home with two kids everyday. I want a life just as much as I want to be with Taylor, but a tolerable Taylor.
I'm not talking about forcing me to take my vitamins. I'm talking about telling me who I can and can't be friends with. I don't want him ordering me around all day like I'm incapable of taking care of myself. I want the Taylor who makes me laugh when he steals the cherry off my banana split. I want the Taylor who picks out my clothes for me. I want the Taylor that teases me whenever I can't tie my hair because my arms are tired. I want the Taylor who can't sleep comfortably without me because Lord knows I can't sleep comfortably without him.
I want to forgive him, but only if he agrees to quit being so demanding. Hell, I want to smash my face against his no matter whether or not we're arguing.
"Then why can't you change?" I sob and bury my face in my hands.
"Cara..." He warns.
"What Taylor?" I shout and furiously wipe at my eyes. "What is your excuse this time? What's keeping you from showing me some damn respect instead of acting like I'm a china doll? Tell me again that you love me but don't show me. That's exactly what is going to keep me from ever being with you. I want to be with you, but it's not going to happen unless you-" another pain in my stomach.
"Dammit Sage! Be careful, you're stressing yourself out." He places his hand on my stomach again.
"No Taylor! You're stressing me out. Just take me to my house." I add quietly, no longer in the mood to deal with the mess that is our relarionship.
"We're not going out to eat. They are, I made sure Amaliana had her credit card. I'm taking you somewhere else."
I don't shout or yell this time. I just rub my temples and act as calm as my hormones will let me. "Are you telling me, once again, you're deciding for me?"
"Cara, be reasonable. You wouldn't let me talk to you otherwise. Besides that, if you really can't stand to be with me for a day, I will have them pick you up in your car. Just please, give me this one day. Let me show you I'm sorry."

He parks in his mansion driveway and I suck in my breath at how much I miss being here every other day.
Taylor happily runs to my side and assists me at getting out. His car, this one in particular, sits pretty low so I'll take all the help I can get. My back aches as soon as I try to stand and my legs are ready to collapse under the pressure. What's new.
"Cara mia, no offense, but you got big." Taylor looks at me in awe.
"That's exactly what you should say if you're sucking up to me." I groan sarcastically and sit down at his kitchen table chair. Nobody is home, which I am glad for. I love Taylor's parents, but I don't feel like being questioned right now.
"You think I'm trying to insult you? Cara, my children are growing inside of you. I couldn't be more happy to have proof of that." He laughs and pulls his phone out. I'm confused for a second, didn't he bring me here to prove something?
*Snap*
"Taylor!" I half laugh. That jerk.
"Cara mia, this one is definitely getting printed." He teases.
"Taylor, why am I here?" I deadpan.
"To spend quality time with your ex, soon-to-be-ex-ex fiancée. You want me prove I don't have to be so controlling, you decide what we do today. We have about four hours until anybody gets home." There are so many things that are confusing me with what he just said. Soon to be fiancée again? I'm deciding what we do? Four hours?
"What do you mean four hours?" I ask the safe question first.
"It will take them an hour to get back, they're arriving just about now, and after dinner, they're going to Chuck E Cheese. That leaves us four hours at least. What would you like to do?"
I really want to do something with Taylor. I of course want to be with him again and I want him to prove himself, to work for it. But I'm really tired and just want to chill.
"Let's watch a movie." I suggest, to which he happily helps me up and makes our way to the at-home-theatre I have only been in once.

~

"No dammit!" Taylor yells and throws his phone to the floor. I can't help but laugh until tears come.
"W-why can't y-y-you just quit b-being a sore l-loser." I manage to say through my laughs.
"I have been playing fun run for over a year cara. How in the hell did you get your rank so high in a few months? I haven't beat you once yet!" He crosses his arm over his chest and looks adorable in the process. I laugh again because it's true. We have been at this for an hour.
We stopped the movie half way through because I got hungry. After spending an hour in the kitchen bickering about how to properly make chicken dumpling soup, I told him to call for takeout and we ended up in his bedroom, on his bed, full on Chinese.
I propped my swollen feet on one of his decorative pillows, added by me months ago, and wait patiently for him to get over his little diva moment.
"Are you done?" I ask after he throws his pillow on the ground.
"Yes." He grumbles out.
"Good because I'm tired and I need to go visit my father before I go home." I try to get up from my comfortable position of lying on my back, but instead I have to roll to the side. The only thing that is stopping me from doing so is Taylor's arms around me.
"Cara, I called the hospital already. He's not improving at all. I would love for you to visit him, but he's not awake yet. Just stay here for a bit longer." He's doing that one thing, where he sits behind me so I'm in between his legs. He rubs my belly from behind, calming me instantly after making my heart race at the mention of my fathers condition.
It hurts to be reminded, but I'm glad he checked on him today. I usually go visit and check on him, but that's just me being a clingy daughter. The doctors say he is going to wake up, just not anytime soon. He's not improving, but he's not getting worse. As of now, he's just a carrot. His heartbeat has been steady, I listen to it everyday. When I'm too tired to leave, I stay overnight with him. In a way, it brings me comfort.
"Do you think he is going to be alive still when the babies are born?" I voice out my fear to one of the only two people I ever have. I turn my head to look him in the eyes, and dare to him to lie to me. Those warm eyes of his never fail to comfort me when needed.
"Of course cara, what makes you think otherwise?"
"The fact that he is a carrot who's condition isn't improving." I sob and put my head down. I cry even harder when my neck starts to hurt. Taylor turns me around so I'm straddling his waist and my face is in his neck. That sweet spice that I smelt is still there.
"Cara..." Taylor coos into my ear and repeatedly kisses the side of my face. If he stops I sure as hell will never forgive him. That's how good it feels after being deprived of his touch for so long. "You know he is going to be there, quit doubting that stubborn man."
I would laugh if it weren't for the awkward fact my face is still in the crook of his neck. Instead, I just let him cuddle me to sleep and find comfort again in his hands over my belly.