beautiful time ↺ nct dream

22 | help

do i possibly love him?

but he doesn't even like me and even told me for over twentieth time already. and i, too, doesn't know what i feel for him. what do i really felt over him?

"look, i understand, i'm not supposed to be asking you this question, it's for you to figure out what you feel but you know i just can't.. i'm sorry." and then he walked away.

it's for me to figure it out. he's right. but i didn't get what he was trying to say and what is he sorry for.

i rushed over him and then, "seohyun, quick! they're making a scene!" he said.

and as i saw them, "oh my gosh." the only thing i've said.

"this is embarrassing.." renjun uttered.

this is really, really embarrassing.

"can we pretend that we don't know them? how about let's escape?" i laughed trying to shove the awkwardness that i feel around everything.

"do you think we can? i mean yes, i'll go with you if you want to and uh.. should we? are you serious?" he asked and waited for me to answer.

help i was just kidding but he looks like he really wants to go out and with me, what did i just do?

"well then let's go?" and that's what i said.

i saw his eyes lit up with a smile and held me on my wrist, running out from the restaurant without the other guys noticing.

after running about ten meters i stopped and said, "where are you taking me anyway? is this my plan or yours?" i asked then chuckled.

"oh, i'm sorry, i didn't had an idea tho, i just got so excited." he let go of me then hold onto his nape.

"how about uhm... let's eat somewhere else? aren't you hungry?" i asked as i felt my tummy growl.

"i'm hungry too, hehe." he scratched his nape, "my treat?"

"really?" i asked.

"s-sure."

why is he so awkward?

[ third person ]

"so uhh... i wish i had a longer time with you. you know i kinda regret everything.." renjun looked down on his feet.

they were waiting for their food at a small chinese restaurant that's way too far from where they were earlier and had to use taxi.

"it's the same for me, i also regretted staying at home two days in a row instead of going out with you guys, that's so stupid of me." seohyun sighed, shaking her head.

"and i really wanna know what has been going on, what's the problem? you can tell me everything, you can rely on me, whatever it is." he said that made her blush a bit.

"well.. about earlier, when you asked me if do i really love him.. i don't really know, renjun." the girl also looked down as renjun looked up on her.

"do you want me to help you figure that thing out?" he asked and got a nod as an answer.

'she got to be kidding me, how can i even do such thing like that when i'm overly in love with her, i'll just double the heartbreak i've got if i'd do..' he thought.

"if that's okay with you." seohyun stated.

"y-yeah, for sure. i'll do everything for you." he says, whispering the latter.

"here's your food, please enjoy!" a lady came up with the food they ordered, "thanks." renjun said in chinese and bowed his head.

"you really are chinese." seohyun snickered as the lady got away.

"what do you mean? i'm literally korean." he laughed.

"but you're chinese. oh i remembered the time when i said i love you in mandarin but really didn't knew what that means and that was really embarrassing." seohyun laughed out her embarrassment but renjun just find her cute every single moment.

"ohh that, it reminded me a lot from the past year. i really missed the small conversations, and everything we had back then." and he suddenly sounded sad after laughing from her sentence.

"remember when we ran from the cafe just to have a talk about missing each other?" he added.

"well how can i forget that was just a week ago." and the girl chuckled.

"i was just so, so happy back then and never thought that you've missed me too and you even tried to.. you know.." he then tried to hide his now red face.

seohyun went silent for a while, feeling awkward again after hearing what he said.

"chinese food are really good." she tried diverting the awkward talk.

"d-did i said something wrong? am i mistaken from what you-" his sentence got cut when seohyun stood up but looking down, "i-i apologize." renjun as well stood up and bowed to her.

"renjun-ssi.. i actually like you- no, i think i was in love with you..." she talked, now shutting her eyes closed and after hearing her words, he was shocked and even doubted if she was joking around or not.

"but, it's really hard for me to tell because of donghyuck, he messed up everything that i felt from you and now.. i wanted you to help me, please help me with this, i want to prove myself that i do not either way love him." then tears started flowing from her eyes that were shut close.

he was left speechless but still managed to ask, "d-do you really mean that?"

"i'm sorry-" she mumbled.

"i-i love you, too, seohyun." he said.

~~~

HI SO I'VE EDITED AND REMOVED SOME SCENES FROM CHAPTERS 8, 9 AND 18 PLEASE CHECK THEM OUT IT'S IMPORTANT!!