kidz in me yard ;)

the beginning of the sloth

i was just at the park with a bucket of candy next to me white van (my usual Thursday) when a mother walked up to me and asked me what I was doing. giving out candy and free van rides, I replied as she slapped me. ouch, she isn't the type of person I'd want at a party. after waiting a couple of hours some kids approach me for ze candy I had. of course I gave them some, I'm not a mean guy, and they asked me why I had a white van. I said it was to give rides around the neighborhood, the children immediately asked to have a ride. yay finally. I opened up my van with a smirk and they got in. we arrived at my house and they were confused. sir, why are we at a house? I thought we were going around the neighborhood. the kid was smart, he had to be eliminated. I kicked him out of the van and he started running buck to the park with bags of candy weighing him down. oh wow out of topic, anyways, I unlocked the door and the children ran inside. I had like 9 kids with me (10 if that stupid kid hadn't ask me about me house) what am I supposed to do with them. one of the children came up to be and told me they had to go number 2 so I told him to pipe the heck down and go to the bathroom in the hallway. after he came back he looked scared, it was because I had a shrine to my lord and savior shrek. I realized I had to teach these children religion. and I couldn't make them learn it at school because 1. schools think shrekism "isn't a real religion" and 2. school is expensive lol. so now I guess I'm just gonna home school them!