Oblivious

Chapter 4 Friends or more?

Mariana's P.O.V.

Beep. Beep. Beep.
Ugh. I reach over and press off instead of the usual routine of hitting snooze. I yawn as I stretch out my arms that have been in the same spot for so long that they almost forgot that they have the ability to move. I'm so glad it's summer vacation. I absolutely hate having to wake up at 5am. I get up and walk downstairs to get some breakfast. I open the fridge and I settle for leftovers from last night's dinner. We aren't big on cooking breakfast on a daily basis. This pasta isn't that bad, it's just a little dry. I shrug and put some into my plate and eat it. I eat so fast. I just ate all of that in like a minute. I need to slow down how fast I eat. I put my plate in the sink and head to the bathroom. It's mom's turn to do dishes. I hate chores and doing dishes. Oh no, I accidentally squirted too much toothpaste out of the tube. Now I'm pushing the excess toothpaste into the hole in the sink. I always make a mess. As I finish and brush my teeth, I rinse the toothbrush and head upstairs to my room. Maybe I should do my summer assignment and get it over with. Hahaha, who am I kidding? I'm not gonna do it right now. Summer assignments are a "day before school" problem. I'm laughing so hard because I do that every year and I'm such a procrastinator. This is boring. I want to hang out, but all of my friends are at work. Maybe I could ask Luke if I can come over. As awkward as that would be, I'm desperate to find out what happened at that party. Oh no, what if I'm pregnant? I'm just freaking out for no reason. He probably used a condom. Luke is really cute and hot, but I just am not ready for that kind of intimacy yet. And I might not even be a virgin anymore...
'Hey Luke, it's Mariana. Want to hang out today?' I wish I could take it back. We never really talked before and here I am asking him to hang out with me. I'm so ridiculous. He's my crush, I don't know how I will talk to him without him figuring out that I like him. Hopefully he likes me back. 'Sure, you can come to my house at 3'. I can't help but feel all bubbly inside. I know he won't ever date me, but at least I'll have him as a friend and I'll exist to him. As much as it hurts, I'd rather be a friend to him than a nobody to him. But how will I hide my crush on him? I'm so obvious. I turn as red as a rose as soon as someone even just mentions his name. Hopefully he likes me back. But I know he doesn't. I'll be lucky if he'll even want to be my friend. Let alone date. I'm so excited to come over and be around Luke! It's currently 2:15 so I better get ready. Like now. I get out my flat iron as I straighten my hair and play the song beside nature by 3 scents of spring in the background. Yes! My hair looks great. What a relief . UGH part of my hair on the left side still looks frizzy. I hate long hair. Sometimes I want to shave it off, but then Luke wouldn't think I'm pretty. Why do I always find myself thinking about him? He probably doesn't even remember the color of my hair. My hair finally looks ok. My eyeliner and eye shadow seem to look great so far. Now just mascara. Gently... Gently... Gently. SHIT! It got on my eyelid. Now I'm wiping away the smear of black along with the remains of my soul that will be black and cold as ice when Luke will friend-zone me. I can already feel a cold shiver run down my spine. But if he will like me, a fire will ignite and melt all that ice away. The ice that will soon take up all the space in my heart will melt and there will be room for Luke, where he belongs. I cannot tell him I like him. I don't want to ruin the chances of being his friend. I don't want to lose him. If he will end up liking me, I'll wait for him to make a move. True love will always find a way. Perfect. I stand in the mirror admiring how perfect my makeup and hair looks. I hope Luke will think in pretty. But if he doesn't, I'm ok with that. I grab the purse on my bed and my phone and I'm heading out the door.
"Mariana, are you leaving somewhere?"
"Yeah, my friend's house"
"Ok. Have fun. Call me when you come back home"
And I close the door and step into the warm encouraging breeze. I push the key I to the car door and step inside. "Hey Luke, I'm on my way. I'll call you when I get there." Damn it's hot in here! I turn on the A.C, can't open the window and ruin my hair. I live pretty close to him and I'm only a minute away. Now I'm driving up his driveway and park the car. I grab my keys, shove it into my purse, check how I look in he mirror one last time, and step out the car. "I'm here." And now I wait for him to open the door.