Love Unexpected

Chapter 8

On the outside looking in.

That's how Halyn felt as she stood on the sidelines watching a distant memory she had long buried play before her eyes. The remnants of that part of her childhood which her mind had suppressed at the tender age of five came to haunt her. 

Filled with melancholy, she watched as a younger version of herself sat on the stairs hidden away, as she witnessed the very first argument between her mother and father- something that would become a regularity before the unavoidable divorce.

The loud voices of both parents resonated in the room and her mind. As a child who had never seen her parents in this kind of way, the anger and malice they had torn each other with had scared her, causing her to shrink into herself and into the wood she nervously clung to. 

That soon passed, blurring into distorted images while a very distinctive memory that had surmounted her trauma of abandonment morphed into existence. The exact day her mother had whisked her away from the ranch played in front of her eyes in vivid colours.

Halyn dolefully watched, as the little girl kicked and screamed in wild protest, reluctant to go or be parted from her father and how she had cried for him, hoping her tears would move him to action but the proud Harjo man had done nothing. Unperturbed, he had just stood there and looked on, ever stoic and impassive to the sight that unfolded in front of him.

Halyn stood a helpless spectator to the heartbreaking scene, her heart in her throat as the tears fell on their own. She angrily swiped at the tears that were streaming down her cheeks now and furiously chided herself for being weak. The grief and pain she had bottled up all these years broke free with a vengeance, mercilessly swallowing her whole.

It suffocated her, to the point she couldn't breathe right. Her hand went to her heart to rub in a futile attempt to ease the pain away, but the more Halyn did, the more it intensified. The unbearable intensity had her sinking to the floor but she wasn't spared that scene as it kept playing over and over again, taunting, regardless of the numerous times she wished it away. But it was unavoidable. She couldn't escape it, she was trapped.

Through the darkness that had quickly enshrouded Halyn, a distant familiar voice suddenly rang clear in her ears, gently and persistently coaxing her awake as its rich warmness engulfed her.  Halyn's consciousness followed the soothing voice which lured her towards the light until her eyes fluttered open. With her heart thudding inside of her and her breath coming out in little gasps, Halyn blinked heavy eyes that felt like lead and it wasn't until a hot tear slid out of the corner of her eye did she realised she was actually crying.

Disoriented with no idea where she was or what was happening, she vaguely stared up at the wooden planks for a brief minute before her gaze shifted to the soothing voice beside her that was urging her that everything was okay. Her eyes fixated on a worried Kasey who had his arms wounded around her, comfortingly rubbing.

Halyn peered up at the man who had his eyes closed and couldn't help in her muddled state of mind to feast her eyes on features that were an inch away from her. She stared, solemnly appreciating the sharp angles of his face that were framed by almond-shaped eyes, a well-defined nose and even lips. Her gaze lingered there for a moment as a recollection of how they had felt came back to her without warning. 

"Kasey" Halyn lowly rasped through dry chapped lips, quickly diverting that thought. 

Although his name had been muttered out barely above a whisper, the concerned foreman lifted his head in response and worriedly stared down at the woman who had been crying inconsolably in her sleep not long ago. 

"Halyn...are you okay?" Kasey questioned, the worry creases that marred his forehead getting deeper until the slight nod Halyn gave expelled them.

 With a relieved sigh, the rugged man pulled her into a hug which Halyn found herself welcoming despite her numerous rants that had centred on staying as far away as possible from the man whose nearness provoked all these desires within her. Halyn found herself relaxing into the warmness of the hug but it was short-lived as Kasey pulled apart the next minute to inspect her face.