Sweet Surrender [18+]

t e n

The second Josh walked into the bar self doubt immediately consumed him. Would Lauren kick him out? Would she yell at him? He had no idea how she would react to seeing him. Thankfully, about a dozen customers sat at different high-top tables or the counter.

Standing behind the bar near the computerized cash register, Lauren briefly looked up from her sketchbook and gave him a blank expression.

She doesn't look mad, he thought cautiously.

Josh stepped toward her direction when he caught Everett's hard gaze. His former roommate frowned and shook his head, tilting it toward the end of the counter. Taking another longingly look at her, Josh reluctantly met Everett at his preferred location.

"She tell you what happened?" Josh asked, gratefully accepting a pint of beer fresh from the tap.

Everett shook his head. "She said she wasn't feeling well and didn't want to talk. Figured it had something to do with you."

Josh smirked, playing with the drink napkin under the glass. "Thanks, man. Appreciate the vote of confidence."

"Tell me I'm wrong."

"Wish I could," he sighed. "I really fucked up."

Everett raised an eyebrow with interest as Josh quickly recapped the horror story, feeling another wave of shame and embarrassment at his behavior.

"Not one of your finer moments, huh?" Everett asked, leaning against the back counter and crossing his tattooed arms across his chest.

"Why did I become such an asshole?" Josh rubbed the back of his neck. "I like to think I respect a woman's decision to say no."

"Did you maybe forget Lauren isn't one of the bimbos that would do anything for you?"

"Maybe," he replied thoughtfully but doubted that was the true reason. Her fierce independence was one of the things he loved most about her. Lauren didn't take shit from anyone, especially him.

"Maybe you expected something in return for everything you did for her – the free shirts, club seating tickets, free dinner."

Josh shook his head vigorously. "No way, man. I offered her all that because I wanted her to see me play. I wanted her to know me outside of the bedroom."

Everett remained silent for a minute, pondering Josh's explanations. "I have one last theory."

"Hit me."

"You're in love with her, and that scares the shit out of you. When she said no to the threesome, maybe you took that to mean she doesn't feel that strongly about you."

Josh snuck a peek at Lauren at the other end of the bar, her pencil flying furiously over her sketchbook. He couldn't be in love with her; he barely knew her. Of course, he was crazy about her and cared for her, but in love? No, he was too practical and maybe cynical to fall in love so easily.

But Everett had one good point: did Josh feel personally rejected when Lauren shot down the sexual tryst? Did he try to save face by acting like a complete douchebag? Did the rejection hurt him so much that he needed to hurt her in return?

"I really like her, but I don't think I'm in love with her," Josh answered slowly.

"If you say so," he said nonchalantly.

Josh had a feeling his former roommate didn't believe him.

"Think it's safe to talk to her?" he asked, draining the rest of the beer and throwing a twenty dollar bill on the counter.