Future Complex

3.

Ethans p.o.v

I'm not going to lie, I was pretty shocked when Dominic asked me to hang out.
I thought maybe he'd drop the idea of even speaking to me after I basically made a scene in front of him on the bus stop the other day. I thought he'd be one of those people who would just see me one time, ask me if I'm doing okay, and then, whatever answer I give, they'll just feel accomplished and never feel the need to think about it again. But maybe he really means well.
And it's not just my naive believe in him that made me agree to see him, but I just need to get out. I need to distract myself. I need something to pull me out of my cycle. I think catching up with an old friend is a good way to do so.

And so now I'm getting ready.
It's an early autumn day. These days I like the most. It's not overwhelmingly hot, but also not freezing cold.

I put on a black pair of jeans and a white shirt with a nice light jacket, black flowy hat and a fashionable scarf.
I like fashion and I cannot lie.
I wear pretty clothes and I actually put a lot of thought into my wardrobe. I hate how that is apparently a weird thing for a guy to do.

..."Could you stop putting my hair behind my ear? Please?" I asked Luke while  we were laying on my bed, having our faces 3 inches away from each other. I was struggling so bad with not pulling him closer and kissing him all the time.                                                                                                                    "No. I like it when it's like that, It suits your 'soft boy' style"...

Goddamn it.
Can every memory I have of him just disappear? Please?

I gave myself a slight hit in the head with the bottom of my palm, in attempt to forget my pain, I suppose.

When that didn't work I just let out a long sigh and ran my hand through my hair. This is probably not going to end, is it?
Asking myself like I don't know the answer...
I should probably get going.

I opened the door from my room and walked through our hallway into the living room, only peeping my head through the door frame.
"I'm leaving. Bye mum"  I said and quickly tried to leave. Unsuccessful.
"Ethan wait!" She yelled after me and I was immediately stopped in my tracks.
"What is it?" I asked and turned around to see my mum's small figure standing behind me with a proud smile.
"I just wanted to tell you that I'm proud that you're going to see Dominic. I know it's been hard talking to people since...nevermind. Have fun, and tell Dominic I said hi" she said and gave me a kiss on the cheek.
"I will. Thanks" and with that I was out the door.

Me and Dominic have decided that we are going to meet in the park close to our neighborhood.
Dominic lives on the other side of town and the park is the midway for both of us.
I didn't even need to take the bus because it was just that close.

I quickly got there, deciding to go to the nearest bench and wait there for Dominic.
Little did I know that he was already there.
"Hey Ethan" he got up and walked over to me.
I haven't realized how tall he is up until now, I guess now it's the first time I can actually focus on it . He was like a solid head taller than me. When did he grow that much?
"Wow hey Dominic" I said and backed up instinctively.
"What's up?" He asked, seemingly confused.
"Nothing, sorry. I just didn't realize how tall you are. Where do you wanna go?" Trying to get to the point and not tell him he intimidated me there for a second.
"I guess we can just take a walk and go down to the lake? I mean unless you've got something that sounds like a good place to hang out" he said pointing to the way of the lake.
"Sounds like a date" I said and immediately regretted it.

"Dude what?" He said and laughed a little.

"I- Jesus I'm sorry. I'm making this awkward aren't I? I just talk that way sometimes. These are the types of jokes you might want to get used to" with Luke this was just our normal way of conversating.
I don't know if I'm just so degenerated at this point that I am incapable of talking normally to people or if Dominic just makes me feel like I can express myself how I desire. I think it's the first option.

"I mean it's fine. I'm used to way worse. These are at least pretty harmless" I could tell it made him a little uncomfortable, but at least he didn't take an offense to it.
"Okay, great. And yeah the lake sounds nice. Let's go" maybe I acted too quickly. Maybe this WASN'T a good idea after all.

We started walking towards our destination while trying to hold a casual conversation, and it went absolutely nowhere. You know that feeling when you make a list of things you want to talk about with a person, and you even have fake dialogs in your head, but then when you're actually speaking to the person and seeing them in real life it all just goes out the window? Yeah, that was me right now.

At least until i saw a bunch of pigeons.

..."ugh i can't catch them!" Dominic said and sat down next to me, frustrated. "you won't be able to catch them. They will always fly away Domi. That's how it works" I said and gave him a pat on the head. "No!  I know i can catch them somehow" he put his  little fist under his chin and started pondering. "Let's try to catch them together!" He finally exclaimed  with the usual child enthusiasm. "I know that if we do it to together, we will be able to catch them!"...

I let out a weak laugh. Thinking he wouldn't be able to hear me.

"What are you laughing at?" I was wrong, then.

"You see those pigeons?" I pointed to the flock of birds.

"Yep, I can see them pretty clearly. What about them?" I could tell he was kind of confused.

"Don't you just wanna go catch them?" I gave him a cheeky smirk.

"Excuse me?" And now he was totally confused.

"Like in elementary school. I remembered you always wanted to catch pigeons while we were out on the playground. I was chuckling at the memory of that" 

"Duuude how do you remember that? I mean when you mention it, I do have the memory too, but i would have never thought of it on my own if i just saw a couple of pigeons" he chuckled as well. Also, was that blush on his cheek?

"I guess i just have a good memory for moments that were once important" Oh the irony.

After that talking suddenly became easier. We continued with remembering stuff from elementary and middle school. It was actually really nice.

When we finally got to the lake we both took our jackets off, put them down on the ground, close to the edge of the lake, and sat on them.

I was more comfortable now. I picked up a rock that was laying close by and just threw it in the lake carelessly.
"Heh weak" I heard the meathead next to me laugh to himself.
"Okay Mr. Big strong football player. Show yourself" I threw a rock his way and he effortlessly caught it with one hand.
What a show off.
"I'll show you how it's done" he took a second to prepare and find the right angle.
Shoot!
Yeah, his shot went way further than mine.
"Good throw" I admitted.
"Want me to teach you?"
I didn't really feel like it was a question, because he immediately got up behind me, without waiting for my actual answer. But he looked so excited. So I decided not to protest. I saw he didn't changed much since our childhood.

"Okay take the rock" he gently placed a nice flat rock into my hand.
"And now you have to aim. You can do it like this" he tried to touch my arm but I flinched. It was an instinct. I don't like being touched.
"Right, Well, just do it like this" he visually showed me the correct posture.
"And now you shoot!"
And so I did. The shot did land further than before. It was probably because this time I tried, but I'll let Dominic have his moment.
"See?! That was good" he praised me.
"Yeah I guess. Thanks" I said and layed down, feeling the cool grass gently holding my head.
Dominic also went back to his spot, only sitting down though.

Now we were silent. But it wasn't awkward like before, it was rather relaxing.
I could feel the light breeze dancing across my entire body, and the the sun which just peaked through the clouds on my face. It was so pleasant...