Future Complex

9.

Dominics p.o.v

TW: mentions of domestic abuse, tiny mention of Rape, trauma.

As soon as Ethan said 'we're friends' I saw my opportunity.

I felt like the biggest asshole in the universe but at this point I was so blinded by the game I was playing that I didn't care. All I cared about was not losing. I had a curtain in front of my eyes and I couldn't open it on my own.

"I-I guess. But I don't know where to start. Is there anything specific that you're referring to?" Every single word I said or any action I did from now on had to be spot on.
I layed down next to him, trying to touch his hand. He immediately shifted himself so I wouldn't be able to.
I got it.
"Why do you do That?" I asked him with a sad expression.
"Why do you always flinch when anyone tries to touch you? Is that something that has a meaning behind it or you just naturally don't like it?"
"I- I think it has a reason" he looked down on his hands, probably not wanting to elaborate, but I was not gonna let that slide.
"Do you want to tell me about it? I swear that I won't judge you in any shape or form" he was silent for a bit, probably thinking of hundred ways to answer... in the end he chose to tell me the truth.
"You know how you asked about Dave...?"
"Yeah" was all i said. I knew where he was going with this.
"I believe it's his fault..." not that surprising. But it still shook me just a tiny bit that he was finally willing to share stuff about his trauma. It was as if someone pulled the curtain I was so blinded with by a few centimetres.
"What happened Ethan? Did he...well you know?" Now he finally let my touch his hand when I tried to grab it.
"No. I think I know what you're referring to and no. That did not happen" I let out a huge mental sigh of relief.
"So what happened?" I tried to be firm but also sensitive. I think it was working quite well.
"He was just abusive. Mentally, verbally and rarely also physically. He always threatened with physical violence though. Imagine someone having their fist next to your face at least two times a day, telling you they WILL hit you if you as much as let out a peep. It got to a point I was twitching out of sheer fear when he moved in the same room as me" the curtain was pulled slightly again.
"How old were you when that was happening?"
"I don't remember exactly. But I believe it got really intense at around thirteen. Before then he would just push me around sometimes and be verbally and mentally abusive. He used to be careful around my mum. But whenever she left me alone with him...yeah he'd go for it" I was surprised he seemed relatively okay with talking about it.
"My mum knew fractions of what was happening but I never had the courage to tell her everything. I used to reassure her that I was okay. I knew she needed him because we were struggling financially. My mum then got a job though and broke it off with him. He kicked us out of his apartment. Only so we would be notified three months later that he got arrested there.
When my dad and my grandma found out how much my mum was struggling they helped her buy this house and pay off everything" He took a deep breath and gave himself a few moments to take a break. I wasn't going to say anything, I was just waiting for him to tell me more.
"Everything wasn't nice and dandy afterwards though. I fell deep into state of depression. I was having panic attacks everyday. I was locking myself up inside my room, not letting my mum inside even though she was crying and begging me to do so. The effects of what was done to me finally kicked in and I was constantly scared he was going to come back.
One night I took all the courage I had left and told her about everything that he did to me. Right the next day my mum got me the proper help I needed. I've been going to therapy ever since. I got rid of most of my symptoms, for the most part. The touching thing stuck with me though. I only don't flinch when my mum tries to touch me...or Luke, when he was still with us" He gave me a space to speak. Looking at me with huge puppy eyes of hope.

I should have been excited. We were finally getting to what I needed!
But I wasn't. The curtain was being pulled more and more. My vision was still blurry though.

"What happened to Luke?" I asked him simply like a fucking dumbass, not even commenting on all the other stuff he just told me. I was still holding onto the slight blindness I had. Still giving it a chance of overtaking me.

Ethans eyes filled with sorrow. I could see something switch. Hope switched to despair. Trust switched to suspicion.

After seeing that I got scared and tried to backtrack a little.
"I think there's something you should know Ethan-" he didn't even let me finish.
"I know. I know about the rumor. Is that what you wanted to say?" All I could feel from Ethan was sheer disappointment.
"Yeah...kinda" I had the same feeling a misbehaving child does when they get caught doing something they shouldn't.
"Did you want to ask me anything about it?" He sounded so beaten down. Like he was giving up.
"I-I" I couldn't bring myself to speak. All the guilt kicked in. The curtains were torn open.

"Y-yes. But first I have something to tell you..." there was no point in denying it anymore. Ethan knew something was up because I wasn't able to go through with my plan properly. I didn't go smooth enough and he noticed. Maybe it is for the better.
"Okay. Nothing can surprise me anymore" his voice suddenly lacked any emotion. It made shivers go down my spine.

"Ethan... I'm so happy that I was able to become your friend. I truly am. And I mean that for real. But...My intentions in the beginning weren't pure"
The tension in the room was released. It was replaced with sadness and disappointment.
"I see. Well, you can tell me about it. There's no way we're saving this now" Ethan was looking up at the ceiling with his hands folded on his chest, still no emotion in his voice. Scary shit...

I told him everything. From the bet to my entire plan. Why I agreed to see him tonight and what I was planning to do with the information he was supposed to hand me. I even told him about the video...

"Ethan..." I could see he was furious. His breathing was heavy. He was trying to hold it all in. Maybe even doing some exercises he was taught to reduce anger, and I saw it wasn't helping.

"You know what? I'll tell you. I'll tell everything you want to hear. Then, you're gonna get the fuck out of my house and never speak to me again. I give you the permission to do whatever the fuck you want with the info I'm about to give you. Save your ass and make Tony happy"
No. I didn't want that. Definitely not anymore. I was now willing to do anything to save what I've build with this boy.
"Ethan-"
"This fucking power that Luke told everyone about, even though I asked him not to, I didn't fucking ask for it. And it is real. Yes, I can see people die. N-no, I in no way participated in Lukes d-death" his voice was shaking violently and his eyes were filling up with tears.
"Yes...we both k-k-knew how he was going to die. Y-yes, we both decided to i-ignore it-" he was crying hard at this point. My heart was breaking. I did not realize how strong of a connection I'd build to this person over the short short period of time we spend together. Seeing him suffer like this was making my whole body tremble with rage.
"Ethan-!"
"Yes, I fucking hate myself and I regret being so fucking stupid and not saving him-!"

All logic suddenly went out the window. I felt an urge take over me. I had just one thought in my clouded mind.

I put my hands on his shoulders and with tears running down both our faces,
I kissed him.

He was fighting back at first, but after a second he gave in.
I don't know if out of exhaustion or something else, but he did.

It wasn't a pleasant kiss, it wasn't hot or arousing.
It was the world's most innocent kiss. It existed just to tell him that he'll be okay, and that I'll be here with him when he is...