i don't want you to look at me
with a warmth so inviting that i have to
freeze myself from the inside out
to keep you where i deserve
i don't want you to look at me
with a sadness that pierces my core
and empathy that fills me with
a burning regret that taste like bile
i don't want you to look at me
with forgiveness i don't deserve
with love that never runs dry
with all the things i take for granted
because
i don't want you to have to
because
i don't want you to look at me
at all
