Half a heart, half a crown

F O R T Y F O U R

It had been one week since the horrible incident and King Devilon has not woken up yet.  I had finally gathered my thoughts together. I will not leave for sure, although my stay will harm him, I will let it be like that because that way, it will satisfy me for good.

These days I had not seen Rosemary and I am not looking forward to see her anytime soon. Without her, I'll be fine but with her, I don't have to work as hard. 

"Pass me the dough." 

I extended the tray of dough to Queen Alizarin, assisting her in baking. Also, these days, I had been baking in the kitchen with her by her consent. Obviously, I am quite surprised to hear her ask me for help after the serious talk we had last week. She made it so clear that she disliked, no- despised me so much with her cold and harsh actions, but I don't know why she needed my help. Maybe this is a trap.

Although she never treated me good, she never disrespected me, and I respect that. 

"Hold this." again, her cold voice invaded my ears, ordering me around.

After a couple hours of extreme baking, we had finally finished. Before I could leave, she stopped me at my tracks.

"why are you still here?" It did not sound like a question instead it sounded like an order, a command, a warning.

I don't know why it bothered her so much, is she afraid that she will lose her throne?

I turned around and gave her a look. The same cold stare that I had given her the last time I hurt her physically. Although her hard exterior showed fierce, I could still see a tiny visible of fear written in her eyes. She had probably thought of the same thing I did.

Without saying anything, I left her hanging in her tracks.

This is the second time I entered King Devilon's room and both times, he had laid there, unconscious. He looked so much better and healthier, his wound is slowly healing. I don't know when is he going to wake up, but hopefully soon.

"I know I am selfish," I stared at him, "but this is the only way for me to succeed."

I sat there and examined his features; he is indeed handsome.

"I am going to tell you this because I know I can't bring myself to when you are awake." 

I wanted to tell him something that had been in my mind. I wanted to confess it out because that is the least I could do before I ended everything.

"From the first time I saw you," I smiled thinking back about it, "I hated you so much, you hurt me physically, so much for a young person to bear with. I am terrified of you, you ruined every emotions I had within me. Little did you know, you had taught me so much throughout those times. You had taught me that pain changes people, that the deeper you hid behind your mask, the safer you will be. Not only that, you taught me how to be strong, alone. I respect you so much King Devilon. You were always known as a monster in people's eyes, but they should know that the monster in you is just your mask."

I leaned over and placed a kiss on his forehead, gently.

"You had changed my perspectives of cold-hearted people, they are only cold just so they could keep themselves warm. I had always thought about my revenge but during those times, I became hesitant. I am scared, not because of the blood shedding, but because of failing. I don't have much faith within myself. I was merely an adult at that time when I was crowned. I never expected the journey to be this long and mostly, I never expect to meet you."

It felt nice to speak to somebody else about my thoughts even if it meant he is not listening.

"So please, wake up and help me with my revenge."

"That night, when you had almost tell me something at our balcony, I knew what you are trying to say.....but please don't feel something deep for me. It is already a sin enough to used you for my revenge, please don't let me hurt you for other reasons. I am sorry to backstab you." 

I thought but I didn't say it.

I sat there accompany him for -god knows how many- hours. Thoughts rushing in my mind, and slowly, guilt entered me again. If only my brother knew, he will be so disappointed in me. I needed to prove to myself that I can do it. I needed to save Ameragonia and my people. They are in the hands of King Antonio now. I needed to free them out but to do that, the owner of the hands must be dead. The only way to do that is by the help of someone that King Antonio trust. I am no doubt that the person who King Antonio trust, is King Devilon.

I am not stupid to know that if King Antonio really wanted to kill King Devilon, then that night during the incident, he would not have told his people to retreat, he would have just kill King Devilon right there but he did not, he left. This is why I knew, their friendship is genuine even if they are not friends anymore. I could not say the same for King Devilon, because he would literally do anything for the person he loves, even if it meant killing his friend.

After the clock struck midnight, I decided that it is time to go to sleep. 

"Queen Alizarin is wrong," I spoke to the unconscious body, "I did not put a heart into you. That heart of yours had always been there, it was just never awake, I did not woke it up, the truth did, your biological mother did. Not me."

Before I could reach for the door, the door slammed open revealed the last person I wanted to see.

Rosemary.

"The rebels had broken in again!"