Twinkle, Twinkle Cold Blooded Star

Prologue

Disclaimer: This is a story of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are author's imagination only. Any resemblance to the actual events, places or persons, living or dead is purely coincidental.

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HER POV

I'm tired and I want to lay my body in my bed now. It was a long tiring but productive day. I quickly went down to my car the moment na nag-stop ito sa gate namin. I entered the main door with no expressions written in my face but I was startled when Dad walked towards me and slapped me--so hard.

I wasn't able to recover that quick so I composed myself first before I looked at him, confused. What the hell? What was that for?

"You're such a disgrace to this family!" he blurted out and I sense that he's really mad, as in super mad like he'll transform into a monster any minute from now. "Where the fuck is your brain, Ayumi? Hindi ka na nahiya na dungisan ang pangalan ng pamilya natin!" he added while pointing his finger on me. I want to laugh in his tagalog accent but not in this situation.

"Dad, please. Enough," my mom trying her best to calm my monster dad.

Ah, okay. I get it now. Parang alam ko na kung saan nanggagaling ang galit nila.

"What now Ayumi? Do you want to say something or at least defend yourself? Give me at least one valid reason why did you do that damn thing! I am a governor and you're a celebrity for heaven's sake Ayumi! At least think of my position if you don't care about yourself. You know all the sacrifices and hardships I encountered before I became a governor and you're going to destroy it just like that? Just because of your stupidity? Nakakahiya ka. Ngayon ko pinagsisisihan kung bakit naging anak kita!"

And with that, I look at him in disbelief. I'm tired. I'm hurt. I was just trying to hold back my tears because I don't want to look weak in front of them so before I give up my tears, I turned my back and act like nothing happened.

"Hija, where are you going?" I heard Mom asked.

"Do not turn your back when I'm talking Ayumi Grae." Dad stated with full authority.

"I'm tired and I want to rest now," I said in blank expression.

"Explain yourself while I'm giving you the chance. Stop being rude Ayu--"

"How am I going to explain myself kung may pinaniniwalaan na kayo at sarado na 'yang utak niyo? Are you kidding me, Dad?" I answered.

"Ayumi Grae! Stop talking to your dad like that!"

Napailing na lang ako before I continue walking upstairs. Madali kong ibinagsak ang aking katawan sa kama atsaka ako nakipagtitigan sa ceiling. Hinayaan ko na rin ang mga luha kong kanina ko pa pinipigilan na magbagsakan.

I quickly wiped my tears and was about to go to the bathroom when my phone vibrated. It's Morgan who's calling. Hindi ko iyon sinagot. Aside from the "big" issue that I am facing right now, he's one of the reason why the whole nation hates me to death. He's half Spanish-half Filipino and one of the hottest leading man of today's generation. Well, wala siyang kinalaman sa galit ni Dad but the fact na nali-link siya sa akin ngayon ay kaaway ko ang buong bansa dahil ako ang sinisisi ng lahat sa break up nila ng kanyang long term girlfriend and his long time love team as well where in fact I didn't do anything. What the hell, right?

I checked my social media accounts at hindi na ako nagulat na trending pa rin ako -- number one. And that's the proof that my status here is no joke.

About the issue with my family, umabot na kasi sa kanila 'yung tsismis about "me who's using drugs" daw. It wasn't the first time na nagkaroon ako ng ganitong issue pero napabulaanan ko iyon noon. Today's different dahil wala ng naniniwala sa akin kahit anong gawin kong pagtatanggol sa sarili ko. Napagod na rin akong depensahan ang sarili ko kaya I have no choice but to accept all the judgments and hate from people although it's not true. Malinis akong tao at kahit kailan hindi sumagi sa isip kong gumamit ng ipinagbabawal na gamot.

Kung sinuman ang nagpakalat ng maling balitang iyon, I want to congratulate him/her dahil mabilis siyang pinaniwalaan ng sarili kong pamilya kesa sa akin na sarili nilang anak. Why is it hard for my parents to understand that it is part of my celebrity life to have unending issues? You know, in showbiz, people around you who have overflowing insecurity will do anything mapabagsak ka lang. Well, I can't blame my dad. He's a governor here in Barcelona at isinusulong niya ang drug-free campaign tapos gano'n pa 'yung naging issue sa akin?

We're living in Barcelona, Spain for 15 years but I was born in Philippines and we lived there for about 5 years. My mom is a pure Filipina and my dad is pure Spanish and he's fluent in tagalog despite the accent because my mom taught him well.

And me? I am Ayumi Grae Marfil--a famous celebrity but hates by many. I was once everyone's favorite but I don't know what the fuck happened.

"Love? I want to give up this life right now. Is it okay if I'll follow you there?" I whispered as my tears started to fall again. I was just staring to our last picture together taken a few years ago when he's still alive.

No one would ever want to live my life. I'm tired of begging. I'm done of pleasing everyone. Now, all I have to do is to find myself, love myself and escape this unfair world where I used to live.