𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐂𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐘 𝐈𝐒 𝐒𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐘, stanley barber

vi. BE MY MISTAKE.

SINCERITY IS SCARY, STANLEY BARBER
( vi. be my mistake )

STANLEY

"YOU'RE DRUNK OFF YOUR HEAD, VI." I laughed, watching my best friend twirl around, her hands laced with mine to the music. "Might as well be." Violet responded, moving her body with surprising elegance for someone who definitely wasn't going to remember that night. But Violet had always been a dancer, whereas I had not, so I just stumbled around awkwardly, clinging to her hands. "I want you like a kiss that's long and overdue. I need you more than I have ever needed you!" Vi sang along to the music along with everyone else, a warm sparkle in her brown eyes. "I love this song, Stan. Have I ever told you that?" Laughter escaped my lips as I nodded in agreement. "Literally thirty seconds ago, Vi. God, you're so smashed, Carter is going to kill me when I take you home like this." The brunette didn't respond, she just kept dancing to herself in her own world: "We could give it a minute, but what's the fun in a minute? When we could push all the limits." In the hazy lights of the party, Violet looked stunning in her outfit. The alcohol seemed to have washed away any insecurity she had about wearing such a high-cropped top, and it made me happy to see her so free and alive in that moment. "Almost love! It's almost love, but it could be love!" She sang, and another chuckle left my mouth, as Vi had never been much of a singer, but the beauty of her being so free was enough to make my heart clench. I yelled something, but Vi clearly didn't hear, my voice lost in the buzz of the party. "What was that, Stan?" Violet shouted back, and so she could hear me, I pulled her in close and whispered in her ear. Upon the contact, the girl seemed to sober up, ever so slightly. "You're the best dancer here, Vi, compared to everyone else." I hushed in her ear. Grinning, she stepped back, keeping her hand linked with mine. "Well, this isn't about everyone else. This is about me and you." Violet beamed, and my heart did some sort of twist. Me and you. My stomach lurched at the thought, and I finally allowed myself to think about everything that had happened today. That kiss, between me and Violet. Initially, I'd assumed that it was just a spur of the moment thing, like Sydney. But the difference between one and the other is that Violet felt right. And watching her dance, the alcohol coursing through her bloodstream I knew why everything with Syd was just so wrong. Because it was Violet that I wanted. "Syd..." I started slowly, my voice hoarse, and just the name was enough to halt Violet in her dancing. "I need to speak to her." I shouted over the music. "Do you want to come, or do you want to stay and dance?" Vi exhaled, almost any evidence of her prior drunk dancing wiped away as she sobered up abruptly. "You need to do whatever you're gonna do, Stan." Sighing, she let go of my hands. "One more dance, and then I'll meet you outside." "Okay," I agreed, hating how her face had fallen so suddenly, and how I was the one to bring her out of her happy state, though there was still the matter of talking things over with her after Syd, that may have yet worsened her mood. I didn't know. I had no idea how she felt, and that scared me. "See you soon," I agreed, and with a small wave, I stepped out the party.