𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐂𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐘 𝐈𝐒 𝐒𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐘, stanley barber

viii. GIVE YOURSELF A TRY.

SINCERITY IS SCARY, STANLEY BARBER
( viii. give yourself a try )

"I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO TALK TO SYD all freaking day, and nothing." Stan complained, handing me the test tube. "She's totally blanking me." "She's scared, Stan." I reasoned, placing the tube in the rack and grabbing a second one. "Still!" The boy lowered his voice. "Syd knocked over a dozen fucking trees. With her mind! We have to talk about that!" Sighing, I continued on with our science experiment as Stanley chose to ignore my advice and attempt to speak to Syd; again. I had no idea how I was going to survive the rest of the day with Stan obsessing over Syd; it was only second period. At least it wasn't about his feelings anymore, just about the fact that she had fucking superpowers. I didn't really now how to comprehend the information myself, but I'd figured long ago that pestering Sydney about it was not going to help anyone. To be truthful, my only hope of coming to terms with this was the other way Stan had been going about it, with his so-called research. After finishing our homework yesterday, me and Stan had poured over every single comic book and superhero film me and him owned— which was rather a lot, considering we were two of the biggest geeks Brownsville had ever seen. We had spent hours devouring something we had previously believed to be simply stories, trying to find a cause or an explanation for what we had seen on Saturday night, yet nothing really did suffice. Stanley was determined to let Syd in on whatever we found,— which was, realistically, nothing at all— and to test her powers, but from the show that just went down in our science class, it seemed Syd was not on board.

"Shit, Stan, what did you do?" I hissed as Stan walked back over here, his cheeks dusted pink with embarrassment. "What did you say to her?" "Nothing, nothing." Stanley defended, adjusting his goggles on his face sheepishly. "It clearly wasn't nothing— she just stormed out the classroom!" "She just wasn't exactly on board with our plan, okay." The brown eyed boy answered, ducking his head to watch Dina wander out the classroom after Syd. "I told you, she's scared, Stan." I responded, mixing the two liquids we were experimenting with together and watching them bubble behind the murky plastic of my goggles. "Wouldn't you be if you found out you had superpowers?" Stan shook his head and winced as the edge of his eyewear came into contact with his still-bruised eye. Scowling, he muttered; "If I had had superpowers, I wouldn't have this stupid black eye."

Stan and I had work that evening, as usual, but the labour came with an added bonus of being a distraction that day. There weren't many customers at the Bowling Alley that night, with it being a Monday, so me and Stanley spent a lot of time pratting around, and even renting out a lane ourselves as we sometimes did, due to the fact that we had nothing better to do until closing. As I set up our lane, Stan was called to help set up a customers, giving me free range when it came to the nicknames on the board. So, when Stan arrived back after helping out, there was a game set up between "stan sux balls" and "vi sky guy". The curly haired boy threw me a lopsided smile. "I feel like I deserve that one after the last few days." He laughed, picking up one of his bowling balls and taking a shot, knocking down only three pins. Stan sucked at bowling, but somehow he always managed to beat me. "Maybe a little bit." I agreed, taking my shot and scoring six pins, to which Stan offered up his hand for a high five, which I accepted. "Though as far as I'm aware, you didn't do any of the ball sucking. That was Syd." Something in my tone clearly bothered Stan. "I'm sorry, Vi. I really am." He sighed. "Nothing turned out the way it was supposed to." My eyes didn't meet his as he returned from the mouth of the lane to the benches as my mind wandered back to my brother's words a few days prior. "No, I guess it didn't." Each of us played another few turns, stopping to help incapable customers, bring Gladys another can of Coke or for a dance interval when a good song came on. Halfway through the game, I was on fifty one and Stanley was on fourty two. "I have a question for you, Stan." I decided, taking a seat on the bench as I watched my best friend swing the bowling ball back and forth before launching it down the lane, where it struck down five pins. "What is it?" Stan asked, sitting on the chair beside me, his palms flat against it as he rocked backwards and forwards haphazardly, looking at me through his bruised eye. "Well, I guess it didn't really hit me how big of a deal it was when you first told me, but I've kind of come to terms with it now, so enlighten me. What was it like losing your virginity?" With a loud laugh, Stan looked at me with wide eyes. "You wanna know?" "Yeah," I nodded. "Though I'm not sure the whole bowling alley does, so keep it quiet." "It was pretty great, to be honest." Stan nodded, running a hand through his curls. The smile never left his face as he spoke, and it was almost like we were just back to normal me and Stan, without all the confusion of the past few days. "Like, I already told you, it didn't feel quite right with Syd, but it still felt good. Especially when she used her mouth, I mean, oh my god." "Stan!" I giggled childishly, my cheeks turning red at the thought, as I still had somewhat a sense of childlike innocence, even at seventeen. "Not so loud!" "That's what she said to me." The boy winked jokingly, and I scrunched up my nose in disgust. "Okay, I regret asking now." Things just seemed easier for me and Stan after that moment. Sure, I was still hopelessly in love with him, but I knew our friendship would always be more important. We both did. "I win, finally!" I shrieked, earning odd looks from the last few customers trailing out through the doors. The score board for our lane showed us the tally: