Home I sit in my room and its painfully silent and I am forced to think. I'm forced to think of everything that happened today. Anger rages its war inside me and I scream into my pillow and tears rush down my eyes. Am I crying? I throw myself up and throw my remote into the mirror and watch myself shatter and it makes me cry harder because I know I'm falling apart mentally. I call Samuel and try to pretend I'm just fine he says "something is wrong with you, I'm coming over". I don't object I want him to come over. Samuel arrives and I can't help, but smile when he pulls into the driveway smiling. He rolls down the window and lifts up a bag with ice cream in it and says " I have ice cream as long as you have spoons and problems it shouldn't melt". We sit in my room on my bed criss crossed applesauce and I lie and tell him I missed him I refuse mentioning
Nolan. He puts his ice cream on the nightstand and leans into me forcing me to lean back lying on my back. He places his arms on each side of my body forming a bridge over my body and he just stares at me. I turn my head quickly and think to myself. Why does someone so cute and innocent like me? Am I good enough? He says something bringing me back to reality and he kisses me. The warmth..... The out of body feeling.... My body lifts slightly as his lips press mines. I don't want it to end I'm in heaven until I think of the feeling I had with Nolan. Similar feelings I feel terrible. I throw Samuel to the floor and walk over to my dresser and place my hands on it back turned to him.
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Where it began
RomanceJames is a singer,songwriter chemistry nerd who happens to be a hopeless romantic. James encounters several obstacles with being gay and dating, such as guys just wanting to have sex with him not wanting him, but he finds a true lover that appreciat...
