This is crazy. I'm a bad friend. I'm just a fuck up. I don't do anything right.
~
My physics teacher hates me. He's always glaring at me. Like I don't do anything yet i still get in trouble.
~
Majority of my friends are into drugs. But I don't do that stuff. And its so awkward being around them when they talk about it. Because I can't contribute to the conversation and I'm just sitting quiet.
To them I'm the good kid. Im the one that doesn't get in trouble. Each time they talk about drugs, they end up asking me when I'm gonna join them. It makes me a bit uncomfortable. Like today in English, they wonder out loud what it would be like to get high with me. Its weird that they would even want to get high with me. Because I'm boring.
~
When I was in middle school I had to go to the counselor, because apparently I had red flags for depression and anxiety. I went to the counselor so much that I knew where most stuff was in the office. Whenever I went it was boring, like we didn't do alot. She made me feel awkward because she would look me in the eye and just maintain eye contact. It was very uncomfortable.
~
Sitting in a crowded room
I look across and all I see is you.
I hate the feelings,
That I feel around you.
My heart races and my palms sweat
I feel anxious, I feel weak.
And I really hate this.
You don't understand
My feelings for you.
That's what hurts me the most,
Because I would do anything for you.
But you won't do the same.
And that's the difference between me and you.
~
