Broken // Jaeden Martell

Chapter 20

trigger warning self harm

Emilia's pov
I got out of the shower and checked the time once more. School was out. Everyone would be heading back to their house. If I could just catch Jaeden on his way to his house, I could say goodbye and push him away. And then work on everyone else.

I looked out of my window and saw Jaeden walking by. Perfect, I can go talk to him right now. I walked outside to see Millie chasing after Jaeden and yelling for him to wait up. That's odd. They hated each other before.

I watched as they talked, but I was too far away to hear them. Jaeden turned around to leave but Millie pulled him back. Then she kissed him. I gasped, and both of them turned to look at me. I turned around and bolted inside, as Jaeden ran after me and telling me to wait.

As soon as I got inside I locked the door and ran up to my room. I pulled my diary out and began to write my last entry.

05/27/19

Dear Diary,
I know what I said. I know I said I was going to say goodbye to everyone, but I think they've already moved on. At least Jaeden did. He's with Millie now. And I know I told you that I liked Millie. I did. But not nearly as much as I was in love with Jaeden. He was the reason I held on as long as I did. He made me feel like someone actually cared about me. And that scared me, so I ran. But now, knowing that he doesn't care, hurts even worse. I can't stay here anymore. Knowing that the one person I truly loved, is in love with someone else, is worse than any pain I've ever experienced. And I can't just run away, I couldn't afford that anyways. There's only one thing I can do. I know I told you I would do it next week but I can't wait anymore. It hurts too much. Living hurts too much. Feeling hurts too much. Loving hurts too much. Thanks for being there for me diary. I'll miss you. You were the only one who understood me. Which sucks, because you're not even real. But I'll take what I can get. This is it world. Goodbye.

I closed my diary and left it on my desk for someone to find. I needed someone to hear my story. Anyone to hear my story. I don't want to be forgotten, but I don't want to be here anymore. I sighed and got up from my chair. I heard Jaeden banging on my door. "Emilia! Please let me in!"

I blocked him out and walked into my bathroom. I grabbed my knife and a bottle of pills. I needed to make sure I was dead. I opened up the bottle slowly, my hands shaking the entire time. I dumped them into my hand and swallowed them. Then I sat on the floor and picked up the knife.

I carefully put it on my arm and slit it open. I did the same to my other arm. I watched the blood pour out and I felt my consciousness start to fade. And with the last shreds of life I had, I picked the knife up and pressed it into my throat. The world started spinning, and I felt myself fading. And as I took my final breath, my door burst open.

Jaeden's pov

As soon as I got to Emilia house I realized her door was locked. But I needed to talk to her. I had to get in there. I'm worried about what she might do if she's upset. I don't want her to hurt herself anymore. I have to get in there. I started knocking really hard and trying to break the lock.

"Emilia! Please let me in!" But she didn't answer. I kept trying to open the door and I kept calling out to her. But she didn't come. I started to look around to see if there was a spare key anywhere. I kept moving stuff around to see if I could find anything.

After a few minutes, I found a key ring with ten different keys attached to it. Well shit, this is going to take a while. I tried the first key. It didn't work. I tried the second key. It didn't work. I kept trying every key, until I got to the last one.

"Emilia! Where are you? I have to talk to you. Please! It wasn't what it looked like!" I started searching everywhere on the bottom floor. I ran from room to room trying to find her. Trying to save her from herself. After finding nothing down here I decided to go upstairs.

On my haste to get up the stairs I failed to notice the Emilia's backpack was in front of me. I tripped over it and fell down the stairs. I quickly got back up and ran to Emilia's room. I opened the door and didn't see anything.

But then I noticed the light was on in her bathroom and the door was creaked open. I pushed the door open and my heart shattered. Emilia was lying on the floor next to an empty pill bottle and a bloody knife. Her wrists and neck were cut open. As much as I tried to fight it, the tears started rolling down my face.

"Emilia? No no no no no. This can't be happening. Come on Emilia, stay with me. Please!" I watched in horror as she struggled to breathe. And then she stopped. I immediately pulled my phone out and called an ambulance.

When I was off the call, I looked back down and saw that Emilia was paler and skinner then she was when she left. She's been through so much, and seeing Millie kiss me pushed her over the edge. I started sobbing again as I pulled Emilia's body closer to mine. I hugged her while I kept sobbing. I loved her. And now, she was gone.

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Hey guys! Thanks for reading. I know this seems like the book is over but it isn't! There's two more chapters. Please don't be mad at me for having Emilia kill herself. I mean I have been saying she was going to do it since the first chapter, if you didn't believe me, that's on you. But seriously, writing this chapter was extremely hard for me. I've kinda grown attached to her and killing her off was hard. But this ending was the plan since I started the book. I mean this isn't the ending, but like it's part of it. Anyways, I hope you enjoy the rest of this book! I love you all! bbye foor noww.!