Silent Treatment

Eighteen

Louis POV

The week is over.

The week I gave him is up and I'm not sure what I want to do about him. Everything is so conflicting.

A week of friendship can't make up for all that I went through. But is it a start? He seems sincere in his attempt to rekindle things and make things better. The week was started off rough for sure, but didn't end the same way. 

I stared at the wall across from my bed, trying to think through all of this. Maybe a pros and cons list would be a good place to start. It tends to help in decision making. Or I could flip a coin. You always make your mind up about something the second that coin reached its max height. Flipping a coin seems too simple and silly for this. Pros and Cons it is then.

Pros. 

Harry and I would be friends again. I won't be beaten up or have my things shoved out of my hands (hopefully). Zayn would probably also be my friend since he follows Harry everywhere. I would have someone to sit with at lunch. 

Cons.

... cons? I'm not sure whether it's a good idea. He might cut me out again and will pretend like nothing happened. The staring at school and all the whispers...

The pros matter more than the cons but the cons are still there. I can't ignore either side of the list, they mean something, no matter how small it may be. Let me think of it this way. This friendship is probably going to only last until school ends. We will probably go our separate ways and he won't reach out. That's who he is. Harry isn't good at things like that. 

So what would be the harm in letting him back in for this last stretch of school. It's not like I haven't been silently counting down the days until it's all over anyways. I can leave this town and not be reminded of all the bad things that have happened over the last few years. I'd be able to breathe again without any pain. 

I'd come back to visit my family. They're all I have left and I care for them. Talking on the phone and talking in person are so different form each other. Maybe by that first visit he will want to hang out once and then by the second not at all. What if I want to see him then? What if these next months are the best of my life or some of the happiest days I've had? 

I wish I had more time to think all of this through. I need more time to decide what I want to do. 

That morning flew by. I don't remember anything after getting up. I know I washed my hair, since it was still damp and chilly from the breeze, and I know I ate. Maybe I did, I could just not be hungry. 

I sat in my room and stared at the wall, dreading to look at my phone. We all have plans this afternoon, Liam planned it since he has to leave again and wanted to do something with all of us. He wouldn't tell anyone what he was planning or where we were going. All I know is to dress warmly or to bring a sweater. 

I hate not knowing where we're going or doing or anything. I hate being kept in the dark on things like this. There's no surprise so why can't we know. But what if it is? It better not be a surprise of any kind. I've had enough of those for the time being, or all my life. 

I pulled a cream sweater over my head as a car honked outside. I stood up and looked as Liam's car pulled into the driveway. I assumed he was just going to walk into my room to let me know that me know that we were ready to head out. 

Calling out a quick goodbye to everyone, I walked out the door and into the car. Zayn smiled at me from the front seat and I scowled. I always sit with Liam on trips, no matter what kind they are. I slowly hauled myself into the back of the car, crossing my arms after the door slammed.