Rather Than

[TW] Rather Than Alone (KkuChaen)

It was a late summer evening during August when Sakura received a call exactly a week ago from her girlfriend, Lee Chaeyeon, while she's staying in Japan.

Her girlfriend of more than six years suddenly informed her that she won't be calling for a while, that the only time she'll finally be free only a week later and that she will be very busy with work so she won't be able to sneakily reply to her messages.

Usually, they would talk all night to catch up and have a chit chat about the little happenings during the day especially when they've been a few hundred miles apart from each other ever since a month ago because of Sakura's job. Of course, some sweet talks and flirting are included but that time was different.

Totally different.

Sakura had to admit, she felt crestfallen at that message but Chaeyeon's voice was hoarse, almost lifeless, far from the usual sweet and kind tone she has. It worries the older girl. Sakura felt her heart drop the moment she heard her voice instead of worrying about what she had said. The older girl had tried calling her again and again but the younger girl didn't answer nor did she reply to her multiple concern-filled messages since then.

Sakura even went as far as contacting their group of friends whom she barely talked with for the past month, asking them to update her about her lover seeing that she will lose her job if she leaves her actual home country. However, they only reassured her that Chaeyeon was okay, that everything was fine and she doesn't need to worry.

Yet Sakura's instincts were telling her that it wasn't.

Honestly, if they told her something bad happened, even if it's just Chaeyeon burning her finger while cooking clumsily and whatnot, her boss could go fuck himself because she won't care anymore and fly back to Korea without a second thought. Still, she wants to trust her lover's words and be patient. Chaeyeon has never lied to her and she's never broken a promise ever since they met during middle school.

They were bestfriends before they became lovers. Sakura as the older of them had seen the younger have her fair share of pain and she saw her grow from that. This time, she wants to have faith in her as well.

Even as Sakura let Chaeyeon fall for others, she made sure to guide her bestfriend after so she won't be left alone and broken. She can still remember the time when she simply watched from the sidelines as Chaeyeon constantly had an on and off relationship with one of their friends, Kwon Eunbi as if their feelings were a broken recorder.

Chaeyeon loved the girl too much that she became too blinded, eventually forgetting to leave some love for herself while Eunbi was more mature and despite liking her, she knew that what Chaeyeon had for her was obsession. She wanted to let go of the younger girl so they really broke up but due to Chaeyeon's persistence, they would eventually make up and the things repeated again and again until Eunbi got tired of it. She had loved Chaeyeon, of course, but it was only at the beginning. Slowly, she realized that it was no longer the love she felt for a lover but rather, she started thinking of Chaeyeon as a younger sister whom she couldn't leave alone. That was when Kang Hyewon appeared in their lives and Kwon Eunbi's mind was eventually filled with her being. It took a year for them to finally break off their unhealthy relationship and Sakura, as usual, was there to comfort her.

As bestfriends, they weren't supposed to feel like that but time passed by and the two of them, especially Chaeyeon, realized her budding feelings for Sakura. It was during her first year as a college student when she found out that Sakura was treated as a wallflower in their university, a girl whose existence was close to being a divinity for all of the students. Suitors were appearing in front of Sakura everyday when they barely had time for each other so Chaeyeon, who never seriously craved the older's attention, started sticking to her as much as possible whenever she had vacant time.