Something Great || One Direction

SEVEN

Isabella

Work has been really great. But I couldn't help but feel so tired and drained when Saturday finally came. As an event manager associate, weekend tends to be the busiest days of the week, but as a newbie, they let me off the hook for now. Since this first two weeks, I'm shadowing the event manager with all the planning and coordinating. I have to say, it's a tedious job but that's what I love the most about it. But I couldn't deny how hard it is to organize a huge event, much more a concert and be in line with everyone you are working with.

Working at that industry is no joke. But I get to live the dream of meeting a ton of great artists. I might not have meet any yet but soon I will. We'll just wait for a huge artist to hire us and that will just fall into place.

I begged Sam that I won't join her in her bar hoping shenanigans this weekend. I just need to rest and get some stuff organized for next week.

Just as I was out of the shower, I got a message from Scarlet, yet again. I opened it and it's another photo. It's a photo of when I spend a day in Glasgow with One Direction. I wanted Sam and Scarlet to tag along but they both have something urgent to deal with back then.

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5 Years Ago

I have became close friends with One Direction after that amazing coffee afternoon. It's a life a fangirl could just day dream while being in class.

They even invited me to join them in tour. I won't be performing of course, I'm not that talented. Instead they just want me to tag along and see everything that take place in every place they go. And I know it's going to be a great one and it was. Seeing everything in their perspective is amazing. I couldn't replace this moment with anything else.

My one month here in London is coming to an end. I told the boys that and they didn't like it. They enjoyed my presence that they wanted me to stay a little longer. They even reached the point of hiring me for some job position, they just made up, for me to stay. I had to tell them they cannot and that's how they told me what they had planned after releasing their fifth album and after doing promos for it. It was not a concrete plan yet, but it is something they are considering.

That actually broke my heart and they noticed me look down on the ground and wiped a tear from my eye.

"Izzy, it's nothing solid yet." Liam said as he pulled me into a hug. As I become closer friends with each one of them, Liam became the closest friend I got. He randomly sends me messages about what came into his mind. He even sends me photos of him and the lads making fun backstage before each show. That is really sweet. And to be really honest, it's nice knowing Liam at a very personal level. Makes me fall in love with him even more, not that I was already, but you know what I mean.

Liam was always been my favorite, I just didn't tell anyone, not even my cousins, nor the internet. I've always been 'i cannot pick a favorite, i love them all' kind of girl. But Liam has a special place in my heart and that has grew bigger every passing day. I just couldn't get the courage to do something about it.

For one, I'm just a fan and a close confidant. Nothing more nothing less, I guess. Just a shoulder to lean on when things gets too much, especially that Sophia break up thing he keeps seeing in tabloids.

Once Liam hugged me, they all did. Knowing that news, concrete or not, is breaking my heart unlike anything. And they knew that it is going to break every single one of their fans' heart, whether they like it or not.

Since that day, I tried to forget about it and just focus my time with enjoying everything. I didn't spend 24/7 with them though, just over the weekend or when they are free.

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That day was a day I didn't want to remember for over 2 years. Knowing it first hand breaks me even more. I didn't expect that they would push through with it but they did.

Now I have nothing against that day. It still hurts but seeing how that decision lead them to where they are now, just brings happiness into my heart. Seeing them achieve what they've always wanted since day 1 just makes me proud of them. They have finally found their voice and sound after being in a strict rule.

I decided to not comment on the photo Scarlet sent because it will just distract me from my current agenda, which was to sleep of course. Scarlet, being the crazy girl she is, send another message.

From Scarlet

Why didn't you say anything? My friend saw it circulating over at Twitter. I don't know about you but you are the talk of the town, for some reason. They want to know who you are and what was your part in their lives before the boys took an indefinite haitus.

Just seeing those words form in front of me left me puzzled. Who would have posted that photo now? I know I did post it just a month after leaving London.  It was the day that I felt the saddest and missing them, so I posted it but my account has long been private and no one in my followers would even see it on top of everything that I posted in the last 5 years.

From Scarlet

Don't try to open Twitter though, it's full of bullshit right now. I don't even know if you have Twitter now.

To Scarlet

Thank you for the heads up, Scar. Won't check it for the sanity of my brain.

I sent that message but I was curious, what where they talking about me and what are their speculations about my relationship with the boys. Instead of resting and having a stress free weekend, I spent the day reactivating my Twitter account and scrolling to Twitter. I saw old friends active and sharing things I didn't understand, at first. But I saw one retweeted that photo Scarlet sent me and that started how I fell into the rabbit hole of Twitter and slut shaming.

That last part was something I wasn't expecting but somewhat expected it.  We all know how in fandoms there would always be toxic fans and that cannot be avoided. They will continue to talk shit about you and make some make believe facts just to make their selves feel better.

I have been immune to those shit 5 years ago, that I know I can handle this and that it is something I shouldn't think more about. Instead, I officially deleted my account and uninstall Twitter from my phone and just went with my initial plan for the rest of the week.

And oh, I just need to get a new book to read during dull days at work.

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written: 05•01•2020 //07•11•2020
published: 07•14•2020