Your Precious Time (KnB Midorima Shintarou BxB)

Chapter 6.2

~Anthon's P.O.V.~

I've been constantly thinking about Jake and how to help him. We've been playing his favorite songs at band practice and I've been making sure Light wasn't around. I've been trying to keep him busy and just distract him. But I still can't take away those nightmares. If there is something that controls people's nightmares I could've helped him already.

It's the thing I hate the most. It is something uncontrollable and I just don't know how to help him. When I make him talk about it he normally can sleep the rest of the night, but not always. I just hope they stop, they make Jake lose control of whay's real and what isn't. It begun again this week and it's really the worst time for him to have those now.

I guess I've been really busy with Jake but I'd do everything for him, he is like my younger twin brother. We always go through things together and our bond is something really special.

I have an older and younger brother, but I'm closer to Jake. I'm the weird one in the family. Everyone else finds music boring, with them it's all about sports or money or being perfect in others eyes.

And I am far from perfect. I am into music and only good in running, that's what I do before school, my brothers are on the football team and the basketball team.

They don't like Jake, but he is the son of an important business man and that's the only reason why I am able to be friends with him. They hate gays, bisexual people, trans people, they hate it all. The only good thing is to be in an hetero relationship. They don't know that I am bisexual nor that Jake is gay.

They know I regularly come home with bruises and know that I am bullied. They don't even think about helping me, I am weak because I can't stand up for myself.

I have had a few depressions but unlike Jake I don't cut myself. I take pills, normal pain pills. Not enough to kill myself, but enough to make me go numb and lifeless. But it has happened twice that I had overdose it. It was an accident but it still happened. Jake helped me with it and it has been seven months and twelve days since my last depression breakdown.

My dream isn't to become a succesful bussines man like my parents want me to be, I wish for our band to become famous.Or for even Jake and me to start a duo career. We're the ones who write the songs, plus we aren't that close to the others. They are nice to us and kind of fun sometimes, but we're good on our own.

Before this week Jake has been hanging around with Midorima a lot, which is normal he is his boyfriend. But it still made me jealous. I have had a crush on Jake in the past but that has passed already, it's better between us this way but that doesn't make me any less jealous. I keep it under control because it isn't THAT much. It only made me realize that I maybe have to search for my own boyfriend. Although I'm sure nobody would really like me romantically, but I'm sure one day someone will be crazy enough to fall in love with me.

When he called me at night for the first time in a long time again, I immediately knew he had nightmares. It is really terrible to see him struggling so much and not have any power to do something about it.

I've been thinking about it and I think he needs to sleep with Midorima. Midorima is his soulmate, I'm sure about it. He'd be the only one who could prevent the dreams. But before I suggest it, I must be sure that when Midorima won't be able to sleep with him, the nightmare will be so much worse than it already was and make him snap in just a few seconds.

'It's all so troublesome.' I think while holding him in my arms just a bit tighter.

'What if I write him a song? It has to be one that is sweet and gives him a little more self trust, but it also has to give him courage to keep going.' I think that's kind of a good idea but it has to be perfect. Everything needs to be in balance so the beats and the music gives him a good feeling and the lyrics to be just right so it does it's working.

"Yes!" I whisper, which made him stirr a bit.

"Nngh stoph" he mumbles.

"I-I'm sorry, just go back to sleep."

"Hmm 'kay." I think he is sleeptalking, he does that sometimes, if you say something he'll answer you. It's kind of weird but I've never bothered to tell him this. It doesn't matter.

'But what does matter is that big ass test for math you have tomprrow so go to sleep.' I need to stop wondering and go to sleep.