Mermaid

The Letter

  For a Friday afternoon, Josie's mood felt seriously unlike her. She felt drained as if all the energy in her body had been sucked out with a bendy straw. If Josie was being honest, she had been feeling increasingly depressed since the meet. She was used to sore muscles and a little fatigue, but it felt as if a grey cloud was constantly hanging over her head. She knew it was silly to take what the Bellmont girls had said to heart, but she couldn't help but wonder if maybe there was a little truth in their rude comments. She hadn't noticed herself gaining any weight, but maybe everyone else could tell, and just hadn't told her to spare her feelings. Josie looked in her locker mirror, frowning. She couldn't see any significant change in her appearance, but something felt different. She made a mental note to squeeze in some time for the gym over the coming weekend. Maybe if she just lost a few more ounces... 

  "What are you doing?", Hope asked, her eyebrows raised in curiosity. Josie shook her head, quickly switching out her notebooks and closing the locker door. "Nothing. Just lost in my thoughts, I guess.", she admitted. Hope stopped her, rubbing her thumb over Josie's forearm. It was something Hope usually did when she wanted to talk about something serious with her, but didn't know quite how to bring it up. When Josie looked up, Hope's eyes housed concern, a stark contrast to the normally unbothered girl. "Hey, is this about what that Bellmont bitch said to you?", she asked, her voice gentle. Josie nodded reluctantly, embarrassment making her feel smaller than she already was. It wasn't a secret that Josie didn't think very highly of herself even on the best of days, but she didn't want Hope- her confident, collected best friend- to know just how low her self esteem truly was. "You're beautiful, Jo.", Hope reminded her. "Anyone who thinks differently is obvious blind- and lost their other senses, too." Josie smiled, endeared by her friend's concern. "Thanks, Hope.", she said, hugging Hope close. When they pulled away, Hope was smiling again. "If I was into girls, and if Landon didn't exist, I'd so totally date you.", Hope admitted, making Josie laugh for the first time in days. She smacked the taller girl's arm playfully, rolling her eyes. "Only in your wildest dreams, Michaelson."
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  "I swear to god, Elizabeth, if you make us watch step up one more goddamn time I will step up my foot into your ass.", Hope warned, earning an annoyed huff from the blonde Saltzman. Josie giggled at their banter, turning the key in the lock and pushing open the door. She dropped her backpack to the floor, kicking off her shoes. "I'm picking this time!", she hollered, grasping the remote and waiting for the bickering and objections that were sure to follow. She was surprised when she was met with silence. She searched through the available titles, only pausing when Lizzie and Hope joined her minutes later. "Is there any way I can convince you guys to watch a rom-com with me?", she asked, looking up at her sister and best friend. She was surprised to be met with confused and angry looks on their faces. "When were you going to tell us, Jo?", Hope asked, sounding hurt. "Tell you what?", Josie said in confusion. Her stomach dropped before Lizzie even held up a folded slip of paper, her name printed on it with neat letters. Josie's jaw dropped open in shock and betrayal. "Where did you even get that? Did- did you read something addressed to me?!" "It was stuck in the mail slot!", Lizzie yelled in defense. "I didn't know what it was! Besides, you can't be mad at me because I'm already mad at you!" Josie sighed with frustration- her secret...whatever it was had been revealed. "Look, I'm sorry. I didn't think it was that important." Hope looked at Lizzie, before sitting beside Josie and giving her her full attention. "It's okay, Jo. Just... start at the beginning."
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  "And for the last six months now I've gotten maybe 2-3 notes a week", Josie explained, finishing her story. "I still don't get why you never told us. I mean, c'mon Jo, we're your family.", Hope reminded her, stealing a piece of popcorn from the bowl in Lizzie's lap. Josie brought her knees to her chest, shrugging. "I don't know, I guess I liked having something that was just mine, you know?" "I guess I can understand that.", Lizzie admitted, her anger at her sister dissipating. "Still, you don't know who this person is, Josie. It could be anyone. Oh my god, what if it's a teacher!" All three girls grimaced at the possibility. "I definitely wouldn't put it past Mr. Bjergsen. He's creepy as hell", Hope joked, making Josie groan and Lizzie fake a gag. "No, you guys don't understand.", Josie said, shaking her head. "This person...they're just amazing. They're smart- like, crazy smart. A writer too. They've written me a few poems before." Josie smiled at the memory. "She's corny, too. A really big goofball. She makes me laugh so easily." Hope eyed Josie curiously. "She?", Hope inquired, urging her on. Again, Josie just shrugged. "I always assumed it was a girl.", she admitted. "She always signed her letters with the same thing- Mermaid." Lizzie and Hope squealed with excitement, jolting Josie from her thoughts. "She had to be on the swim team then!", they exclaimed, proud of their revelation. "I bet it's Jenna Gilbert. She always has her eyes on you.", Hope guessed. Lizzie scoffed at the idea. "Maybe it's Sadie- it would explain why she's never had a boyfriend." Hope looked at her in horror. "Gross, Liz! That's my cousin!", Hope objected, tossing a pillow in her direction. While the two girls debated who the mystery person could be, Josie cuddled under her blanket, stealing the last of the popcorn from Lizzie. Hope and Lizzie could debate all night between themselves, but Josie was content with leaving her Mermaid anonymous, where she felt comfortable. 

Even if a small part of her was wondering who exactly they were, too.