Kagagaling lang namin sa hospital at kasalukuyan kaming nasa sasakyan ng mama ko.
Isa na namang check up ang natapos. In 19 years of existence, I never knew that I would be experiencing these kinds of pain.
Pain from losing a younger brother and a father.
Pain from losing friends.
Pain of losing wealth.
Pain from losing myself.
Ever since my 18th birthday, I never felt true joy. Yes, I smile. Pero alam nyo yun? Yung ngiti na hindi umaabot sa mata? Yung ngiti na hindi mo alam kung bat nakakaya mo pa?
"Syang, gusto mo ba muna mag Mcdo?" Si mama. The ever loving mother. The one that kept me going.
"Ma, wala na nga yata tayong pang gas? Kakain pa tayo sa labas? Oh please, gusto ko nalang mag-aral."
"Favorite mo yun diba? Naaalala ko, noon? Kapag uuwi ang papa mo gusto mong palaging may sundae and fries. Pareho kayo ni Austin" Mom, stop.
Its been more than a year. Maybe 400 days?
400 days of crying myself to sleep.
400 days of waking up just to sleep again.
400 tiring days of my life.
Hindi ko napigilang tumulo na naman ang luha ko mula sa mga ala-alang ito. Unti-unting nagbabalik ang bawat sakit na naramdaman ko. Do you know how hard it is to see important people dying right before of your eyes? Wala kang magawa. Wala kang kwenta.
"Syang, anak. Tama na, umiiyak ka na naman." Nagpunas ako ng luha at nakitang nakatingin sya sakin through the rearview mirror.
"Sige, kung ayaw mong bumili tayo ng fries, okay lang. How about a book? Gusto mo ba? Sabi mo gusto mong mag-aral?" Hay nako ma, puro ka naman gastos eh.
"Ma, I just wanna go home. Madami na po akong libro. Wag na po tayong gumastos. Wala na tayong sapat na source ma, 19 na ko. Naiintindihan ko na po na hindi tayo palaging may mapagkukunan."
Nakita kong natigilan sya dahil sa sinabi ko. Pero napapagod na kasi akong ganito. Nakakapagod na magpanggap na gaya pa rin kami dati. Lalo na at wala na si Papa at Austin.
"Ma, sorry. Hindi ko po sinasadyang mapagsalitaan kayo ng ganun. I'm just, I'm tired. Uwi na po tayo. Luto nalang tayo fries sa bahay." Tumango naman si mama saakin at nagtuloy sa pagdadrive.
Matagal tagal ang byahe at nakinig lang ako ng music sa cellphone ko.
Walking the Wire by Imagine Dragons
Do you feel the same when I'm away from you?
Do you know the line that I'd walk for you?
We could turn around, or we could give it up
But we'll take what comes, take what comes
Oh, the storm is raging against us now
If you're afraid of falling, then don't look down
But we took the step, and we took the leap
And we'll take what comes, take what comes
YOU ARE READING
The Line In Between
Teen FictionOneshot || Sometimes, what we are asking for is within our reach, we're just too blinded. Oh, I'll take your hand when thunder roars And I'll hold you close, I'll stay the course I promise you from up above That we'll take what comes, take what co...
