Finding out the person I've been talking to for two weeks was Billie Eilish was definitely a shock. In that call, she had explained to me her fears of meeting new people and their antics. Many people have taken advantage of her in the past, and at first assumed I was one of them. It would explain why she was so vague in the beginning. I completely understood, I wouldn't be able to deal with it.
Billie goat: I can never understand how people like cats to dogs
Lauser: because they are just superior!!!!
Lauser: I can list so many reasons rn why cats are just better
Lauser: very independent but is still affectionate, very clean, SUPER cute especially as babies, Is very intelligent and adventurous, loves to play, gets along with anyone who gives them a treat, sleeps in funny positions, the purrs are the CUTEST THINGS IN THE WORLD!!!! makes that little Ppprrrpf? sound when they jump or when you greet them, or when you talk to them in a baby voice and they get excited and roll on their back, the way they LOVE BOXES, and they stare out a window looking at literally nothing for hours like it's the most interesting thing ever
Lauser: Also cheese. my cats both love cheese. It's bad for them but how can you say no 🥺
Billie goat: Cats are annoying bruh. Those little shits wake you up at 5 am to eat, jumps on counters and knock shit down fucking steals food. They are bad as hell wym
Lauser: noooo they are cute and babey and I love them
Lauser:
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Billie: mine stays mad asf.
Lauser: bc you've got to boooond. Cats have different personalities. My oldest cat is very shy and isn't really affectionate but loves meeeee and my pepper sleeps on my face and calls it affection I love it
Billie goat: you're a weird ass kid dude. You're gonna grow to be a weird ass cat lady
Lauser: that's singlehandedly the best compliment I've ever received 🥺💞 thank u
Billie goat: wouldn't doubt it
Suddenly I felt hands on both my shoulders making me scream out of instinct. I turned around to see both of my sisters. Marilyn and Camryn (I know) We are identical triplets and ever since we were young, my mom had always thought it was cute to make us dress exactly alike. We'd always get compliments from older people, but honestly we were adorable kids. Thankfully, we grew into our own styles. Marilyn was very trendy and loved fashion. She never leaves the house without dressing nice. Camryn was much more edgier and prefered rock band T-shirts and Ironically loves Billie Eilish, and me, I'm wearing a unicorn shirt. We were so alike yet so different. "Who's got my little sister so smiley?" Marilyn teased attempting to reach for my phone but I already locked it and put it behind my back. "You're older by 4 minutes! And mind your own beeswax!" I yelled. Of course that did not stop my nosy siblings in the slightest "Oh my gosh cam she likes someone!!!! Lauryn has a cruuush!" Marilyn teased. They both started repeat it over and over in a singsong voice.
"Stop it, no I don't! We are friends, and she just said something funny." I pouted. "Yo it's a she! I never thought I'd see the day." Camryn pretended to fake cry and topped it off by fake sobbing into Marilyn's chest. Marilyn patted her back for comfort. "There there, I know, she's finally getting out of her shell and- *sniff* getting some pussy!" I groaned and stomped out of the kitchen where I was sitting for the past hour. While I love them, they love to tease me. They always try to set me up, which fails because first off, it's awkward, and second I'm still awkward and can't be flirty if it could save me. Ever since I came out to them as pan, they supported me, but never fails to make me remember how much I suck at the romance world. And honestly, I don't like Billie. I'm just glad I have her as a friend.
