Alone, Manipulated, and Abused

Part Two- Signs of Abuse

Abuse comes in many different forms. It could be physical, mental, emotional, or verbal. Since Elijah and Frankie were both long-distance, it was mostly mental, emotional, and verbal abuse that was put onto Elijah almost daily in their entire relationship. Elijah didn't see these red flags of horrible abuse until things ended officially for him and Frankie in early November. He was a dumb, too attached and in love kid to realize that everything Frankie was doing to him was classified as manipulation and emotional, verbal, and mental abuse.

The first real signs began just two weeks into their relationship. After their first break-up and Frankie ending things a second time due to him falling for another man, Elijah was frequently bothered by Frankie's friends because Frankie had constant messages to tell Elijah while they were apart. He would be called an annoying pig on the daily, being told he was too clingy and Frankie wouldn't dare consider going back with him ever again. Frankie even told these words to Elijah a couple of times straight to Elijah's virtual face. Of course, it hurt Elijah but he was just too attached to let anything go in between him and getting back together with Frankie each and every time they would get back together.

Each break-up would be considered as emotional abuse due to how emotionally draining and terrible it was for Elijah to go through. Elijah's mental health started to decline with each and every break-up to the point where Elijah soon began to take up self-harming and began having suicidal thoughts. His mental state decided that if Frankie could act this way then so could he and if he needed to beat up his body by cutting in order to get Frankie back then so be it. Even besides the break-ups that Frankie kept on doing, he played with Elijah's emotions outside of being with him. Especially further down the road, where things were officially ended for them but they would get feelings for each other on multiple occasions yet Frankie would never commit to beginning a relationship with Elijah again. He would sit there and provide hope for Elijah that he wanted Elijah back, but once things began getting serious and Elijah asked for Frankie back, he would tear everything down and they would end up fighting or being upset with one another for a few days.

Frankie was never there for Elijah truly, if you think about it. When Elijah would be experiencing suicidal thoughts, they would call but the way Frankie would help is by yelling at Elijah and telling him that he needed to be there. This could have been because Frankie needed him to be there so he could continue destroying Elijah's sanity even further. Every time Elijah would self-harm, he would end up getting yelled at by Frankie yet again because even though Frankie did this multiple times in their relationship, Elijah didn't have a right to. Frankie never did anything to fix Elijah's feelings and help soothe his bad thoughts, he just made them worse. Day after day after day. It continued on like this even after they ended officially. Because no matter what Elijah did, it was never good enough. Choosing to remain friends with Frankie only destroyed him even further after they ended officially two months after being together.

Further down the road, a year after ending officially, this abuse continued. Elijah and Frankie would begin having a friendship and trying to keep in contact with one another despite Elijah secretly still being in love with Frankie but Frankie was taken by somebody else. These moments of friendship didn't last very long though. They would constantly fight and block one another, then return to their friendship days or weeks later. They would commit to a never-ending cycle of being friends and then blocking each other after an argument. This went on for many months while Frankie was dating a friend of Elijah's. This would even continue past the relationship Frankie had with the friend, and then a year or so later.

This never-ending cycle of being friends with Frankie and then having to block one another left Elijah emotionally and mentally drained. Elijah would get feelings for Frankie quite often while they were being friends again after reuniting after an argument because something about him kept drawing Elijah back again and again. But when things would get serious, Frankie would deliver a silent treatment and claim he was just busy, yet in reality, he was making relationships with other people. Elijah would end up hurt, confused, and frustrated that Frankie was claiming he still loved Elijah yet seeing other people at the same time, ultimately playing with his emotions for weeks on end. This would end up making Elijah leave the friendship he had with Frankie multiple times, creating another cycle that would end up occurring more than once in their lives over and over again.

After year three or four of continuing this cycle and ending the friendship again, Elijah realized that Frankie was exhibiting a narcissistic abuse pattern. When a narcissistic person abuses their victims, they begin with belittling comments which progresses to ignoring behavior. Frankie would continuously ignore Elijah to the point where it led him to lose his sanity a couple of times on multiple occasions. Frankie would always claim he was busy or he just didn't feel like talking because he was going through some things, but Elijah knew deep down he wasn't busy. He had nowhere to be and nothing to be doing. Frankie gave Elijah the silent treatment many times, especially when they would indulge in arguments every now and again. He never stuck around to talk things out and left Elijah to go to bed angry and upset. Not only did Frankie begin with belittling behavior, but it progressed to adultery. He cheated multiple times in the relationship, not only with one person who he invited to a party for them but with multiple people as well. He would form love triangles, especially with a guy who he knew that Elijah was in love with and trying to move on with multiple times. Then would come the sabotaging, which Frankie did by claiming Elijah had sex with a friend of his which lived 9000 miles away so he couldn't have possibly done so just because Frankie was jealous of how Elijah was moving on with someone Frankie was interested in before.

This friend of Elijah's and Frankie's love interest was named Logan. Logan was an Australian native who met Frankie month two of Elijah and Frankie's break-up. Frankie and him dated for about two to three months before Elijah began realizing that what Frankie had done to him, he was doing to Logan too. Frankie was doing the same narcissistic abuse pattern to Logan and manipulating him in many forms so that Logan would stay and Frankie could keep on controlling him. Since Elijah fell for Logan and Logan fell for Elijah, Frankie ultimately became jealous of the two and sabotaged the relationship by telling Elijah's mother that he had somehow had sex with Logan even though they lived far away from one another. This ultimately led to Elijah losing his internet privileges and not being able to talk to Logan properly any longer until he had his privileges back. Frankie then started controlling Elijah again by showing his feelings towards him and claiming he loved him, even though weeks prior to this he claimed he was not in love with him anymore and he was happy with Logan and Elijah needed to move on. The event of Frankie confessing his feelings to Elijah led to them being intimate with each other online while Frankie was still together with Logan.

Logan was then devastated as he was told of what happened with Elijah and Frankie while Frankie was still dating him. It led to the downfall of both the relationship he had with Frankie and the friendship he had with Elijah. Elijah was devastated as well, he really liked Logan as a friend but this wasn't the only friendship he had lost because of Frankie's controlling and abusive behavior.

Due to all the abuse, manipulation, and controlling behavior of Frankie, Elijah lost many friends. They didn't want to stick around and watch Elijah get hurt multiple times. Sometimes Elijah ended up reuniting with these friends but then losing them once again because he ended up going back with Frankie again because of how manipulative he was and how quick he was to get Elijah to fall for his manipulative controlling ways again and again.

Mental and verbal abuse weren't the only parts of Frankie's narcissistic abuse. It was completed with emotional abuse as well, toying with both Logan and Elijah's emotions on the daily. Every time Elijah tried to move on to be happy with somebody else, Frankie would step in the way of that by coming back and trying to gain Elijah's trust and love back. Of course, Elijah was blindsided by love so he would always return. Breaking hearts along the way. Frankie would even go as far as threatening those who Elijah would fall for, telling them that they needed to stay away from Elijah and basically telling them that their feelings for Elijah would never match up to his and that they were invalid. There were many times in the relationship where Frankie showed signs of hatred towards those who crossed Elijah's path and became a partner of his. For example, Frankie showed much hatred towards Elijah's ex/best friend Eleanor. They had a fantastic relationship, Elijah and Eleanor. That's why Frankie needed to show so much hatred towards her and control Elijah so that Elijah would never return to her again so he could continue controlling and abusing him.

In the end, Frankie was more abusive than caring for the entire time Elijah had known him. It created trust issues within Elijah and took a lot of time to get over.