Against all odds (KyloRenxReaderxArmitageHux)

Chapter Seven

We walked in silence. Only the thudding of out footsteps against the floor breaking the tension.
   I stepped in without hesitation into my cell and walked straight over to my bed and rolled over onto the mattress. I could see Kylo's sillhouette in the corner of my eye - he was standing there like a lost puppy. Shifting his weight from one foot to  another he waited for some recognition or maybe a dismissal or even a forgiveness speech.
   "Come back another day," I exhaled, just loud enough to let him hear, before rolling over to face the wall. In the most explicable way, I still wanted to see him; maybe it was just loneliness setting in, I told myself but in my heart I knew that I wanted to see him for him.
   Before I could dwell on it any longer, I fell fast asleep.
                                   *
  With a sudden jolt, my eyes flew open. Trying to catch my breath, I sat up. It had felt like I'd just fallen for hours on end; finally reaching the end of the cycle  - head first.
  Everything felt hot - I was sweating profusely -  I like I was boiling in a pot of oil.
  My hand gripped the end of my jumper lifting it above my head and throwing it against the foot of the bed. A feeling of relief overwhelmed me when the cold air rushed against my skin.
  I flipped my pillow over to the cooler side before settling down again - I just couldn't go back to sleep. I tried to forget about what had happened but like a vice, anxiety refused to let go of me.
  I stood up and saw a tray at the entrance of the cell; I thought I could use the comfort of some food. I ate slower than usual, trying to focus on the mild salty taste and gritty texture of the mystery meat - anything to get my mind off previous events. It was cold but my body still gratefully relished the nutrition - it was like having the first bite of a hangover meal after a raging night out.
   When I lifted up the packaged roll of bread, I saw a small piece of paper attached to the bottom of it.
   'Millicent' it simply said.
The handwriting was perfectly neat - all the letters proportioned perfectly and with care. It only took one word for me to realise what it mean - I was going to return to Hux's quarters.
  A small giddy feeling kicked out my prior worries as I stuffed the bread into my mouth - not bothering to savour the meal anymore.
   I waited what felt like days but realistically was a mere couple of hours before the cell slid open. Hux quietly popped his head in and motioned me to get out. I quickly leapt up - I had put on my shoes earlier on out of eagerness.
   "Well you're happy," Hux noted, his eyes studying my face.
   "Yes of course, I get to be with you," I gushed - only realising how coy it sounded after the words had time to settle into his mind. I didn't take it back. His cheeks seemed to get heated again with the appearance of a red hue.
  "Ah," he let out, to acknowledge what I had said.
  We began walking down the same corridors again, although I was excited I couldn't help feeling anxiety about accidentally running into Kylo. I didn't want to face him yet.
    "Hello darling," I cooed when Millicent came up to us, strutting, when we had finally reached his quarters.
Immediately I could notice the absence of the ashy smell of cigarettes - the ashtray was also missing from the table. Seemed like Hux really took what I said on board.
Millicent wrapped herself around Hux's legs lovingly as she purred countinuously, before finally pausing at my feet and sniffing shoes and legs.
  I knelt down and stroked her gently along her back before travelling up to her head and then giving her chin and cheek scratches which she seemed to appreciate the most - purring loudly in content.
   All this time I could feel Hux's eyes watching me - carefully.
  "Hux?" I grabbed his attention with my curious tone.
  "Yes, Y/n." He answered back, strolling over to the sofa before taking a seat. I followed him shortly but sat on the floor, back against the front of the sofa so I could keep supplying Millicent with my love.
   "Why do you keep seeing me - I think half the times I see you, you get tossed around and basically strangled" I wanted to know - it was true. Our meetings seemed to have reoccurring theme of him ending up with being hurt. "I mean we've not known eachother for a long time."
   The question seemed to have stunned him as he kept his eyes fixed on the table - holding in his breath. I didn't mean for it to be such a racing question and the more seconds passed, the more I began to feel bad for him.
   "NEVERMIND" I told him, hoping he'd return back to his normal state.
  "I don't know." He finally said, turning his head back to me.
  "That's okay. We're friends now, right?" I looked up to him, smiling.
  "Friends," he muttered, his lips parting after. Silence filled the air and I began to be concerned if I had said it too fast - but it wasn't like I asked him to marry me or anything.
   "Yes, I supposed we are." Hux finally turned to me nodding in affirmation.
  "Say, then. You never told me your first name." I asked him.
  "Armitage." He stated, neither proud nor ashamed. "Armitage Hux."
  "Oh like Simon Armitage," I recalled. "When I was younger we had to read his poem for an exam - he wrote about the aftereffects of war to a soldier that had gone home. At the time, I thought it was boring but when I looked back it was really beautiful and eye opening. He was really good poem, Armitage."
   "Was this Armitage a good man?" Hux asked curiously.
  "He was known for his poems - goes for realism rather than idealism. It's heartbreakingly beautifully." I explained before letting out a small laugh, " I never knew him personally, Armitage. if that's what you're thinking."
  "Oh," he said dissapointedly - his head lowering for a moment.
  "What do you mean by a good man?" I scooted closer so I was parallel to his legs, leaning into his knee.
   "If he was good - brave, commendable, successful." Hux stated - he was visibly more stiffer but I had been to preoccupied by his answer to notice.
  "A good man to me, might be your own worst nightmare." I sighed, "like the resistance. They're fighting for what they think is right, aren't they?"
  "That's true but ultimately the truth shall prevail." Hux declared firmly. I became surprised when I could feel a tingling sensation as I realised he had begun fiddling and twirling with the ends of my hair - he had become more comfortable, slowly but surely.
   "You have to remember that the victors write history. The winners always like to paint themselves in a better light - don't they?" I challenged his statement.
   Hux's eyes met mine, a mixture of adoration and frustration weaved into the darke green flecks of his iris.
   "Then maybe the losers should've tried harder." He snapped back, breaking out a smile.
   "Maybe," I smiled back, "but you are correct - the truth does prevail. People never forget - and what drives history? The people."
     "Have you ever been to war, y/n?" He questioned me.
   "Fortunately not." I sighed,  "I did want to work for the military at some point in my life."
   "Why'd a lady like you want to go to war?" Hux asked gently.
  "I'm not a pillow princess Hux, I can fight..." I trailed off, "if I was trained to."
   I couldn't fight; I knew basic self defence , but to fight a war would be something vastly out of my current capabilities.
   "And yourself? Do you enjoy being commander?" I asked back.
  "It's not about enjoying it - it's who I am. It's something that needs to be done; I was born for this." Hux stated firmly - I guess he was a firm believer in fate.
"But then what's life when you don't enjoy it?" I rebutted, "No point wasting what little time you have doing something you don't love."
   "I do enjoy it. Besides, I couldn't imagine doing anything but this." He responded nonchalantly.
  "Did you grow up wanting to do this?" I asked slowly.
  He sighed, his face quickly becoming tense then relaxing again - perhaps I shouldn't have asked.
   "As a young boy.." he paused looking up to the ceiling. "As a young boy, I wanted to do many things - I don't think I ever made my mind up. My late father was an Imperial officer so I watched him alot - it was then I knew this was my calling."
   "Sorry about your dad." I whispered, I always seemed to ask peopel the wrong things.
  "It's okay, his end was fitting for him," he looked at me from the corner of his eye, "What about yourself, did you enjoy what you did?"
   "I wanted to everything when I was younger, I never made my mind up. I chose to treat animals because it made a reasonable amount of money and it's rewarding and interesting - I grew to love it more than I thought I would."
  "It doesn't sound like it was your first choice." Hux tilted his head, intending to learn more.
  "No, I wanted to be an artist but my family wasn't fond about that. Besides I was told it doesn't make much money" I reminisced painfully, they had gone ballistic and it hadn't ended well.
  "You're a hypocrite." Hux said matter of factly, "do what you love."
  "I never said I wasn't," I nudged Hux's leg playfully.
  "You didn't, did you?" Hux nudged back.
  "Never." I leaned against his leg, closing my eyes and getting comfortable. Hux leaned over and gently grabbed the sides of my arms to encourage me to sit beside him rather than the floor and I complied.
  "The things I can offer you is very limited but I do have some paper and pencils here." He whispered when I rested my head against his shoulder. His hands shifted awkwardly from his lap to his knee and finally crossed on this arms - it made me doubt whether he'd sat like this anyone ever or whether I was too close for comfort or not.
   "Awe, Hux" I cooed, "Thank you so much! Do you think I can take it back to my cell? I get so bored in there that I might eat the walls."
  "Cell. Of course, I'll make sure you're allowed." He nodded quietly.
Oddly, he hadn't asked me anything about our last meeting where I was taken away by Kylo but if he didn't want to remember the incident I didn't want to inconvenience him.
  "Y/N, you can stay here for the day," he offered, "if you want, of course."
  "Can I?" I beamed.
"Yes. If you'd like." He turned his head to me nodding.
    Spontaneously I hugged him, burying my face into the corner between his neck and shoulder. I was ecstatic at the small privellage of being in a different room for a while - a really spacious one as well.
  Hux was stiff - not responding to my embrace so I quickly detached my body from his.
   "Sorry, I sure do tend to make you uncomfortable." I apologetically smiled. His mouth was parted, his eyes slightly wide and his face growing what had become a familiar shade of red.
   He stayed silent before embracing me this time - to my surprise. A sense of relief washed over me - he didn't mind it.