Another Way To Love

Listening Ear Part 2

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"I wish they would only take me as I am"
- V I N C E N T V A N G O G H
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Chapter 11

THEO TOOK GEORGIE to his room once the clock struck 9 on the dot. It didn't take much effort as usual since Theo bribed Georgie with the false promise of pancakes for breakfast the next morning.

"I'm not gonna hold you to pancakes, but George might", Theo said when he came back.

I rolled my eyes, "You just like causing trouble for me".

He hopped off the staircase with a playful stare. Taking a seat on our living room couch he patted the place next to him. "Now, talk to me"

I started where I stood.

"Well...". Where to begin "I liked her for a while?"

Theo narrowed his eyes, "Why does that sound like a question?"

"I can't tell when I first started to like her, everything kind of blurs together. The earliest time I can think of is when we went to the carnival", I shrugged helplessly.

"Seriously? Dude, that was a whole year and a half ago"

I couldn't give him a proper reaction so my face contorted into one of a grimace and a half smile.

"Okay, this atmosphere is too chill for a conversation like this. I want some real solid answers so I can help you get through this properly", He stood and went to grab his bag at the door.

"Where are we going? Georgie is still upstairs, remember?"

"He won't notice that we're gone, let's go", He gestured to the door with a quick jerk of his head. Of course, I followed, locking the door behind me.

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We reached the school and found our place outside on the bleachers, facing the football field we'll be coming back to hours later for practice.

"I'll ask you some questions to get everything started, you just answer honestly, good?"

"Yeah, thanks Dr. Gatsby", I rolled my eyes and placed myself on the metal bench below.

"My dad is a certified psychologist, being psycho analyzed daily gives time for some educational experiences. So I've got this in the bag", He reasoned.

"What are you going to start with?"

"Something easy, for example, why in the righteous hell do you love Amelia? Sure she looks good but she's so mean"

I laughed at that, "To you maybe, don't know what you did to make her like that". He looked at me pointedly, wordlessly letting me continue.

"Well, she's smart, for one. Kind, considerate and honest-"

"Sorry to interrupt, but literally any human on the planet could have those traits. What makes her stand out from the rest?"

"She's always been there, I can't remember when she wasn't. She knows me and still hung out with me with my dry humor, the complaining and everything that makes me flawed. She sees past that"

"I cannot tell you how to feel, trust me, I know", Theo began to shift, seemingly holding something back. "When did you convince yourself that you loved her?"

"Convinced?"

"Well, you put her on this high pedestal, that must have taken a while to put together, right?", He smirked but seeing my deadpan expression his smile turned to a thin line.

"There are other girls who would also like you for whatever reason, I have no idea", He joked lightly to which I shoved his leg. "You are in high school, don't take everything so seriously yet"

"How?"

"Just enjoy it, no more heavy thinking. No what if paranoia, no looking down on yourself because of her choice-"

"To be with Damien?", I finished for him. His name left a salty taste on my tongue.

"Exactly. Fact of the matter is, he did ask her and you didn't"

"Ouch", I grabbed at my chest.

"Well it's the fact that you constantly bring up, right?"

I nodded solemnly with a small hint of a smile.

"Do you love her more as a friend than the opportunity to be with her? What would you rather be to her?"

"You just told me to not be serious about all this", I remarked.

"Yes, but you need to get your priorities in order. Answer the question"

I took pause at this and looked up at the faint stars in the sky. I always compared her to them, and I did put her on a pedestal. Didn't she deserve to be?

Her friendship has meant a lot to me, but it did change the second she dated Damien. It wasn't focused on us anymore, it wasn't Ezra and Amelia anymore.

"She's my best friend-"

"I won't take offense to that. Wasn't I your first kiss?", He interrupted.

"Shut up and stop reminding me"

It was a casual weekend and Theo thought it was crazy I hadn't kissed anyone yet at 16. After a long debate about whether it really mattered or not, he offered and I accepted.

Sue me.

"Alright fine", He raised his hands defensively. "Go on, I'll stop interrupting"

"We've been friends for the longest time, and I've had other girl friends. They just didn't offer the same level of comfort being with Amelia did.

"Maybe I just need to focus on someone else. Because you're right, this shouldn't be ride or die, I'm in high school. I need to step back from the familiarity"

Theo grabbed my shoulder roughly and his eyes grew rounder, "Are you saying what I think you're saying?".

"What?"

"You want to get laid. This would solve a lot of issues"

"That is not what I'm saying", I assured him.

"You sure"

"Positive, just like your STDs"

We let silence ensue and broke out into held back laughter.

"I just, I can see that I don't need her that way. Maybe I just miss her as my friend. I miss my friend"

"I'm sure we can remedy that with time. You need to realize that you don't need her"

"Oh you want to replace her", I grinned.

"I'm serious", Theo sat up. "No more Mia Monroe. Unless..."

"Unless...", I tried to finish his sentence.

"You ask her out. Tell her how you feel"

"She has a boyfriend, dumbass"

"Give her the option"

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It's been too long
AUTHOR