Aristocrat | ✓

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

That night, when everyone had retreated to their rooms, I took a lot of time to think. At first, when we had gotten, I had planned to spend the night with Lord Evenus on his own bed, but when I saw him after the ball my eyes had whirled up, and I felt like I was going to cry. So, I decided not to be around him. I was afraid I would break down and be made to explain myself. I didn't want to do that. I didn't want to come off as selfish and demanding that Lord Evenus leave Sawyer in the past for me. We'd been together for months, and the Lord had loved him for years. I had no right to demand that from Lord Evenus, but good God I couldn't deny that was what I wanted from him.

I heard a knock on my door, and I looked up, noticing that it was the door that joined my room to Evenus'. I stared at the door, hugging my legs to my chest as I thought of what to do. I was in a nightgown and sitting in bed. I had come up a bit early, not wanting Lord Evenus to stick to me after he had been set free by his friends.

It didn't help that I saw men openly flirt with him. It didn't help that he didn't push back and went along with it. I knew it was not cheating per se. We were sharing a bed, but Lord Evenus had never made it clear to me that we were lovers with proper obligations to each other. Also, even if we were, I didn't think I would be so angry about the situation if I hadn't broken down in tears about Sawyer just before.

"Manfred," he called me when I didn't answer the door. "I know you're in there," he added, and I looked down at my feet, feeling my chest squeezed with pain. He was speaking so softly to me, but I wanted to be angry at him now. I wanted to have some time to myself to think.

"Can I come in?" he asked, and I remained quiet, looking over to the door. "I promise that I won't say anything," he said, and I squared my shoulders, licking my bottom lip as unshed tears burned my eyes again. If he walked in, he would see me crying, and I would have to explain myself, but he promised not to say anything, so I wonder...

"Manfred." The Lord's voice pulled me out of my thoughts. "Manfred, please give me permission to come in."

I wasn't sure why he was doing this. He could walk in without my permission. I was his servant, and me ignoring him was rude and tasteless, but here he was begging me to let him in.

"You can come in," I let out, swallowing spit when I noticed how dry my throat was from choking on sobs I didn't want to let out.

The door to the bedroom I was in creaked open, and I watched as Lord Evenus stepped into the room before closing the door behind him. He stared at me, with his brow furrowed and his lips drawn thin. He was wearing a cream nightshirt and loose black breeches. His feet were bare, and his hair was an uncombed mess.

He didn't talk for a bit, but his promise not to say anything didn't last long.

"Manfred..." he trailed, looking at me before taking steps forward. He was soon by the bed, and before I knew it, he had climbed in with me, sitting by my side. I held on to my legs, tightening my grip as I attempted to hold myself together. "Is something the matter?" he asked, and I just looked down at my feet, not talking.

"Did someone say something to you?" Lord Evenus asked, taking hold of my shoulder.

"No," I let out before the Lord took hold of my chin and made me look at him.

"Then why...?" he trailed, knowing that I understood what he meant. Why was I upset? Why was I like this? Why did I look so hurt? I understood all the questions he was asking me with his eyes, but I couldn't find a way to express them to him without giving away the jealousy I had for Sawyer and my uncertainty about our relationship.

"I saw you flirt with those men," I muttered, deciding that telling him that got to me was understandable, and not enough to turn the tables. "I don't know. It upset me," I added, sucking in my lips as my eyes watered.