Wake of Darkness [1]

Chapter Twenty

♕ Falling Starlight ♕

Aubrette could barely sleep through the rest of the night. She tried to but could not get the urge to stare at herself on the mirror of the bathroom to disappear, so instead of fighting it she had gone and just waited. At first, she didn't exactly now what she was looking for and then realized she was expecting to see herself looking back at her. She was waiting for her hair to turn lavender, for her eyes to be bright grey to shine like they did every day on mourning moon when her magic was at its fullest.

But none of that happened.

She was not disappointed, or at least tried not to be, she'd gotten used to seeing herself in a different hair and honestly a part of herself, however small, was relieved. It was not like she could walk out of Goldcrest now, not when there was so much, they still needed to uncover. Aubrette did not want to admit to herself that she would also learn to miss it, the heat that no longer felt like an enemy, Vereena's overwhelming smile, even Asher's forever present smile. And when she did leave, when the moonlight shine directly into her skin again and magic filled every inch of her blood, she would no longer get to call them friends, or allies or whatever it was that they now were.

She'd go back to being Blackstone's princess, to being a blessed, a moon blessed, and they would resent her for it. Maybe not for what it meant, maybe they wouldn't care about her tittles, or that they could never really go back to fighting on the same side, not while the king sat on Blackstone's throne, but they would resent her for lying.

For not telling them just how many people were surely looking for her right now, or for the sickening gut feeling that had settled in her stomach that the deaths were somehow tied to her. Even when every rational part of her brain was telling her otherwise.

But hadn't she been present when the only three murders they were aware of happened?

Maybe it was a sick coincidence.

When Aubrette looked down into her stomach, her skin did not longer ache, and all that was left was a scar that dived her torso in two, like the wound had healed long ago. Maybe the moonlight had worked for something after all, but just not the way she'd expected it too.

The thought of having to stay in Goldcrest for another month, slinked in on her. But it did not feel like a prison sentence anymore. Not when the answer to what had happened to the gray lady might as well be hidden in this city. The answer to what they had intended to do to her. To the Aureums. What they had done to Layla.

Aubrette let herself sit by the edge of the window, enjoying the sight of the night, remembering how huge the moon had looked from Asher's window. The mourning moon was the most beautiful moon of the year for her. Although when you're born under a full moon, well her opinion was more than a bit biased.

She imagined herself sitting next to Sybilla on her room, watching this exact same sight, if they were lucky maybe the both of them would've gone to Wood Sorrow and celebrate at the top of the crooked tree, cheering as the moon reached the midnight point, and Aubrette turned twenty, and her magic was renewed.

But none of that would happen tonight, there would be no magic on her veins pouring out of her, there would not be cheers and laughter, if she was lucky the moonlight would be enough to heal the aching in her heart that begged her to turn home. That mourned for her people.

And the worst part of it all was that she could not hate him. Could not hate Taj and Vereena, or any of the Aureums. They were good, better than most of the guards that had once worked under her mother. Better than Nerezza and Deirdre for sure.

Aubrette stepped out of the edge returning to her bed, feeling like all of her energy had been drained.

No. She couldn't hate them, and she was sure they did not hate her, in some ways maybe they even had grown to like her but that didn't mean they weren't still the opposite side, didn't mean that if she could tell them who she was they wouldn't turn her to the king. And she couldn't risk Sybilla's safety.