The silenced lore

Chime of Bells

Tick tick tick...wailed the clock as my steadiness started to die. After the wait which seemed like an eternity TRINGGGG the bell rang to startle me from the pretentious dreams I have crept in during the wait. I am pathetic at having a normal conversation. Small talk would take all my combined efforts of life time to not to seem awkward. It's not that I am an introvert or something; it's just that the concept off small talk is meaningless and doesn't really do anything. 

                                            But people are stupid and ignorant enough to just judge you by the things that you only wish to show them. So with the brightest mask of emotions and the driest humor I have gone to start conversation with bunch of girls in the back of my class. It's a bit like nesting of birds (very bad comparison) everybody was into this socializing which was not entirely to get new friends but to see at what level their rivals are. The recess time was bunch of sailor men fishing with the rods of lies. I don't understand despite being this obvious people will give away and lose it. Why can't this be true, people are willing to be sad, lose their integrity than be lonely. I am about to lose mine.

 Never mind just thinking doesn't take you places. So I listened, replied asked details I wouldn't give a crap about to just sustain this trend. I thought Natalie is bad but on seeing these guys I understood people can be pathetic. Hey, don't judge me this how I really feel about these things. What's this life of pretext? We live for some damn little time. In this time if one doesn't be truthful what's the point of achieving. Thinking of achieving the day when I spoke to Mr. Allen the chairman of Achievers' Academy our conversations most vaguely and unexpectedly comes close to my idea of extreme truthfulness. Despite the meeting being one of the most nightmarish experiences I had it was also the time I was open to every word. TRRRRRING...The thoughts flew into their ways with the loudness of the bell.

  I hate that stupid sound. When I think of my day these bells for the commencement of each class seemed like the bells on the funeral ground. The authority the bells had on my life is more than what I had on my life. Do you find it insane too? When the bell for recess rings it seems like a second but when its class it seems like one big eternity. 

  I crept into the crooked corner beside Natalie. She asked me if I had made any friends. I didn't want to seem uncool so I said yes. The natural charm she has I can never be totally safe and secure with her. She was with me, I was with her since ages but really we are not together. But what can be more beautiful than to have your rival so close, close to the heart, close enough to pierce it .

 To be honest I carry my words really well when I am on a purpose. I guess people don't realize it. I managed to make ties with some girls in the back. It's not they are bad and sit in the back. It's just that they sit in the back that's it. I kinda like two girls Jessica and Rachel. I didn't really move close with them and change is never my forte. I don't know why there is a sense of emptiness in the thoughts I'm saying. Maybe it's my fault to make seem everything must be in the way I want. Maybe....