Whether one accepts or negates it, everybody says goodbye. As a matter of fact, a lot of goodbyes...
And when things get tougher, everyone really needs goodbye... The very sad part is - at times, goodbyes seem to be very painful, they easily get into your nerves. On the other hand, the funny thing is, there are instances that they cause no more pains and one says "At last! I can breathe now!"
Goodbyes are sweet messages of hellos. Whatever reasons there may be, they mean beginnings to say the least.
To Lorie:
Goodbyes mean "I miss the day when we're together"; I miss early breakfast with you in my bed; I miss the way you looked at me; I miss the snore/stertor when you're deeply asleep like a god beside me; I miss all the laughters we shared, the pains that broke us, the fears when you're not with me. Everything!
Goodbyes mean, "I miss everything about you."
Goodbyes are quite devastating and incapacitating...
Goodbyes demand solitary thinking and more reflective thinking.
Goodbyes make the feelings very intensed and can make someone to hold on and to believe that there are ways to keep or hope; let go or forgive; or better yet, to swear or get lost.
Well, the last part, probably, is more of Adam's thoughts of goodbyes.
Lorie's phone rang and she answered, "Hello? Who's this, please?"
Lorie never got any response from the caller. The call was just cut.
She tried calling back and the line got busy or was just out of coverage.
After a few minutes, her phone started ringing again.
The number was the same.
Lorie accepted the call and said, "Hello? Who's this?" Then, the call was cut again.
Lorie started thinking. She had a lot of assumptions.
First, "It must be Rick. Rick just miss me."
Second, "It must be Adam. He still loves me."
Third, "It was mom. She needs me."
Fourth, "It must be Arthur?" Then, she just smirked.
Silly thoughts. Arthur, the traffic enforcer was jsut beside her. Delusional it was. :-)
"What's going on, ma'am?" Is there anything I can do?" Arthur asked.
"Nothing. Something just came accross my mind" She replied.
"Okay. We're almost done. Just sign in here." said Arthur.
"And that's it. You can go home, ma'am. Just a reminder, be careful when you drive. And plese have your mind present all the time." Arthur said.
"I'm sorry again for causing too much traffic earlier." Lorie pleaded.
"Well, the past is not something to fix for. What happened already happened and there's no turning back. Just never do it again. That's the best thing you can do." Arthur, with a smile, intelligently replied.
"I have to go now." Lorie responded.
"Take care, Lorie." said Arthur.
"You called me Lorie huh." Lorie said.
"It's your name, right? Unless you want me to call you ma'am Lorie or Ms. Villanueva." Arthur answered.
Lorie just smiled.
"So, I'll see you when I see you, Lorie. I just hope it's no longer in the street." said Arthur.
Lorie remained speechless.
There are moments that one is never ready for goodbye but one has to be prepred all the time. Some good things really never last, Barry Manilow once sang and sometimes, they are jut as good as memories installed and synced inside the brain that whenever necessary or unenecessary one tends to remember and feel the same pain over and over again.
Lorie drove home but her mind was a little bit better than when she talked to Rick at the cafe. Lorie was no longer a horrendous sight. Lorie probably thought that fate and life offer second chances in ways she couldn't ever imagine.
"What's with second chances? They are not meant for the same person, I guess." said Lorie.
"Well, second chances vary from person to person. To some, a second chance may be for someone else's past. A second chance may be with another person who's ready enough to fall in love. A second chance must be sweeter than someone's remote or recent past. For me? I don't kow yet unless everything is clear." Lorie talked to herself.
"I wish I never loved Adam. Goodbye was awful. Second chance poses no possibility though I still love him that much. It's difficult to be who I am not. It muddles me a lot." Lorie told herself and sighed.
When Lorie arrived to her unit, she began sobbing.
"I told myself not to cry anymore but I can't stop. I miss Adam..." Lorie whispered.
YOU ARE READING
TEARS OF DECEMBER
Roman d'amour“Everything that is done out of love, no matter how little it is, is a job well done. That’s what he told me”, Lorie told Rick when they’re together at the Melancholy Cafe – the place where they usually stay when both of them feel so sad and nobody...
