ThunderSnow

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE: I have to try...

One last day. One perfectly lazy, carefree day in the frosted stillness of the Minnesota woods; no hectic shooting schedules, no prying photographers, no suffocating expectations or perceptions. But time doesn't stop, even for Eli Colton. All too soon, the blissful day ebbed away, fading to one last tender night together before morning – and reality – dawned, bright and piercing.

"Back to the real world," Eli said with a shrug as he lifted a bag and lowered it into the trunk.

Lyn sighed with a weary half-smile. "Unfortunately."

Eli slipped his arm around her waist and pulled her to him, kissing the top of her head tenderly. His fingers curled into the soft, golden waves of her hair, caressing in slow, methodical circles as he spoke softly and reassuringly.

"I will treasure these last three days forever, Lyn. But most of all, I cherish being with you – being together – and that remains true, no matter what." He leaned back and looked deeply into her eyes, cool aqua meeting deep sapphire. "Only the venue is changing."

He smiled that trademark crooked, slightly imperfect Eli Colton smile – the one that could disarm women in an instant – as he placed his finger beneath her chin and tipped it up, dropping a light kiss on the tip of her nose.

As Eli bent to retrieve the last of their luggage, Lyn bit her lip anxiously and turned away from him. How could she tell him what she was really thinking; about the doubts and fears that washed over her in relentless waves, eroding her confidence and threatening to drown this newfound happiness?

She knew how this inevitably would end, how it had to end. Surely he knew it, too. Right? How could he not? He would have to go back to LA eventually. So, what then? It's not like this could continue in some sort of long distance relationship. It would be over. A brief winter fling.  The tabloids were right after all.

But beyond the distance, a much larger specter was looming. They didn't just reside in different parts of the continent; they lived in contrary worlds.

Dammit Lyn! What were you thinking? Why did you set yourself up for this? You know better! Girls like you don't get the happily ever after. This isn't a fairy tale or one of your improbable romance novels. Wake up, buttercup! 

She knew the devastating heartache that awaited her at the end of this road, and she was careening straight for it.

Grasping the icy silver door handle, she closed her eyes for a brief moment before lifting it. The door seemed to channel her own dread as it groaned in protest. Heaving one last sigh, she squared her shoulders and donned her best "everything is fine" smile as she dropped into the driver's seat.

Deep lines emerged in Eli's brow as his lopsided smile tipped into a frown. Though he had only known Lyn a few weeks, he could sense when something was wrong, when she was holding back. It was just one of many qualities that he found fascinating and refreshing. Though she tried to obscure her feelings behind a brave facade, being fake just didn't come naturally to her. Her eyes were dull and lifeless; her smile forced and stagnant. Something's not right, echoed in his mind on endless repeat, like an old worn record with a skip.

The drive back to Minneapolis was filled with large, stifling pauses, interspersed with brief moments of small talk and pleasant conversation. Eli lightly drummed his fingers on the armrest in anxious concern. His mind raced as he distractedly watched the never-ending canvas of white pass by; surreptitiously casting glances at Lyn every few minutes.

Something's not right...

The agonizing silence continued all the way to the hotel. The car had barely come to a stop in the underground garage when Lyn quickly released the trunk and climbed out without a word. Eli's frown deepened as he joined her and began lifting their items out of the trunk.