Ethereal | RJ (HSMTMTS)

Part 6

Ricky POV

I'm starting to get used to the scent of EJ's car. It's a vague musk disguised by the pale fragrance of a rainforest air freshener, making the dry mountains smell humid. EJ's in acgreyish-blue T-shirt and jeans, matching the muted tone of the sky, but his smile fills in the missing glow. Every once in a while, he glances at me while he drives, meeting my watching eyes. Being around him feels so easy, like I don't need to hide anything about myself, which is weird considering how introverted I usually am. 

"So where are we going?" I wonder. 

"It's a surprise," EJ replies. 

"You really like surprises, huh?" 

"Well, even if I told you, it's not like you'd the place."

"Fair enough."

"I brought snacks, though," he goes on. 

"What'd you bring?"

"Another surprise that you probably wouldn't know anyway."

I settle with the uncertainty, leaning back into my seat and gazing out at the trees as we pass them by. Sunlight breaks through the cracks in the branches, hitting the car like lasers, swiping over it in their white heat. Our destination appears as EJ parks the car at the side of a dirt road, and I car hear the sound of water trickling from somewhere in the forest surrounding us. EJ steps out first then comes to open my door for me. 

"What is this place?" I ask. 

"Just wait. You'll see."

He closes the door and leads me through the trees, out to a rocky cliff edge. It looks over a body of rippling water a few metres below, and across the space is the tiny waterfall from which the rushing sound is coming. The minerals in the stones glisten by my shoes, holding my attention so well that I don't even notice EJ pulling off his shirt and jeans until I look up and feel my whole body go dizzy like jelly taking over my limbs. He tosses his clothes aside before dashing up to the end of the stone and leaping off, creating a crater in the water where he lands. I'm laughing in shock as I step out to peer over the cliff at the boy swimming below. 

"Come on!" he shouts. "It's fun! Trust me!"

EJ's a little weird, but in a good way. He radiates this energy like you're always on the verge of something wild happening, but you never know what, and I'm not convinced he even knows what. I think he tends to make things up as he goes, and honestly, I kind of like it. It makes life interesting. 

I undo my belt and strip down to my boxer briefs, then I let my adrenaline build as I run up to rock's edge and take flight. I plummet through the surface, feeling the liquid sheathe my skin. When I shatter through the top again, I suck in a gulp of oxygen and let my body drift onto my back as the water splashes up on my limbs like a tide on a seashore. I push myself against the current, toward the waterfall. There, I slip my hand through the clear wall an touch the rocks behind it. Determining it's safe, I lean back and let the water pour over my head. EJ chuckles as I come back out, wiping my face dry. 

"I've never seen a waterfall before in person," I tell him. 

"Really? Well, this isn't much of a waterfall."

He wades closer to me, occupying the spot to my left by the water wall. 

"There's water, and it's falling," I state. 

"Can't argue with that."

He tilts his head up, bending back to feel the same cool drizzle as me, and my eyes drop from his face to the muscles in his chest, which are like ripples of their own. Wet, they gleam in the sunlight, disappearing when his shoulders bob under the surface. But now I'm looking at his arms which are strong from all his years of water polo. Finally, I manage to get my eyes back up to his face where they trace his chiselled jaw. He's one hell of a human, like the angels just wanted to see how attractive they could make a person, and he was the result. 

After a while in the water, we return to the rocks to put our clothing back on. EJ grabs the food he brought from the car, and the two of us sit facing each other beside the water, barefoot to prevent our socks and shoes from being soaked by the rest of our bodies. He opens up a cardboard box shaped like a pizza box, but inside isn't pizza. There are two pastries, both flat and covered in golden brown drizzle and a white cream. 

"What are these?" I ask. 

"The most Canadian thing you could think of," he replies. "BeaverTails."

"They look really messy."

"They are. That's why I have a ton of napkins."

I laugh, and he picks up one of the treats. I take the other and bite into it. It's incredibly sweet, flavoured like maple, and I feel like I must be eating the equivalent of ten sugar cubes in one bite. 

"Do you like it?" EJ asks. 

"Yeah." I finish swallowing the bite I'm working on then take another, and once I'm done that, I question, "So how did you find this place?"

"I was looking for somewhere to be alone one day."

"That place is usually my bedroom for me," I say. "I have a whole setup with a beanbag chair, a tiny TV and a stash of snacks so that I never have to leave."

EJ smiles at that and looks down at his feet. "I wish. My family seems to think my room is a community centre. People come barging in and out whenever they feel like it."

"At least you always have someone to talk to," I reason. "I only have my dad. My mom moved away long before she and he even got divorced."

"I guess. But sometimes I need space, you know? Sometimes I just feel like—like they're all living in a completely different world than me. Like, they're all on the same page, all feeling the same things, and I just...feel different."

That strikes too true. It's actually a bit scary how much I understand that, how much I understand him. 

"Yeah," I mutter. "I get that. I only really have one friend at home, and we've been best friends since elementary school, but even sometimes with him, I just feel like an outsider. Like I'm supposed to be more like everyone else, but I'm not."

"Like you were made the wrong way."

We both raise our eyes simultaneously, and at that moment, I feel a connection latch between us, preventing either of us from looking away. The wind falls deeper, painting the water's edge in a low radiance, which I feel vibrating in my chest and through the veins in my palms. And my eyes carefully wander down to his lips, and suddenly everything makes sense. Everything, from the way I feel different to the reason I can't watch the boys' water polo team, to the reason this boy's emerald eyes lock me motionless. 

The connection severs the instant he drops his head downward, studying his half-eaten BeaverTail in his hands, and gravity washes over me reminding me that I'm just a boy sitting with another boy on a rock, and we aren't invincible against the forces of nature. But for a moment, it really felt like we were. 

That night, when my dad goes off to his room, I sit down at the computer in the living room and open up the internet browser. 'Can boys like boys and girls?' The first results I get are all opinion forums, many of them arguing that there are men giving women AIDS after having previous relations with other men. Some are just general pages on homosexuality. But finally, I find one article that answers my question with a word I've never heard of before. 'Bisexual'. That seems to fit. I'm bisexual.

A/N: Hello! I really hope you all liked this chapter. I really enjoyed it. Anyway, stuff is about to happen more soon, so get ready. I love you all and appreciate you for reading and just existing. Have a lovely day!