Trigger Warnings: mentions self harm
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ROMAN'S POV
"Well..." I hesitate, should I tell him now or wait? I mean I'm already starting the conversation. There is no turning back now.
Virgil looks hurt, as if my hesitation made him start overthinking which is probably what he is doing.
"Virgil. Stop overthinking, it has nothing to do with our relationship. Like I said before and I will keep telling you I love you so much and you are my Prince Charming. What is not ok is that you can't see that!" I am trying so hard to keep it together and not cry. Virgil looks happy but also confused.
"Virgil do you love me?" I asked softly. I knew the answer but I don't want to rush into such a heavy subject.
"Of course I do Ro. I always will." He says tears in his eyes. I wipe them away and kiss his cheeks.
"Do you trust me?" He nods as a reply.
"I want.. I NEED to hear you say it please?" I can't do what I'm about to without knowing how he will react.
"I trust you Roman." He says a smile on his face. Good. Makes this easier. I lean in and start kissing him, his mouth doesn't taste like usual, it tastes metallic. I pull him into my lap, we start a pretty heated make out session, I slowly take his hoodie off as well as his shirt. I flip him over so I'm on top.
"I'm sorry" I mumble onto his lips, we could continue this later if he felt up to it. I pull away and looked into his eyes and he is confused, I think I can sense a hint of hurt too. I pull him off the bed wrap my arms around him and start walking towards his light, I turn it on and pull away from his warm, loving embrace, leaving my hands on his hips. His smile slowly fades, the realisation of the fact that I can see everything he has done to himself must hit him because he looks at the floor. I didn't expect things to be this bad, he was ridiculous skinny, had cuts and scars all over him, I could see his ribs and his hips. Not to mention his hips had scars meaning there were probably more scars on his legs.
I gasped. I didn't mean to but I couldn't stop myself.
"..Virgil.." he avoids looking at me. I grab his chin and look him in the eyes. He has tears rolling his cheeks, I kiss the ones rolling down his face and wipe the rest away.
"Are there more?" I ask and he nods, trying to hold back tears. I put his shirt back over his head, sit up against his headboard of his bed, pulling him down with me wrapping my hands around his waist. He clings to my shirt, holding a fistful of the material and buries his head into my neck and sobs. Sobs that are so heart wrenching, the sobs were all the pain he has been hiding finally letting it all go. After about thirty minutes he had calmed down.
"Do you want to talk about it?" I asked, I know it sucked but he needs to talk to someone.
"I want too but I'm not sure what to say or do." He replies voice trembling and cracking.
"How about I talk for a bit then?" I suggest and he nods and sits up in my lap hands playing with the end of my sleeves, something I think he was doing without realising.
"Listen. I don't know why you didn't feel good and why you decided to do such a terrible thing when you are such an amazing person. I love you so much, more than I can even comprehend! You don't have to understand why you felt that way, well, this way but you aren't going through this without me, do you understand? I will be here for you, scrap that I will be here WITH you, anytime you want to harm yourself I will be here to do something with you to take your mind off it and to show you I love you. I love you so much you brighten my world Virgil. Actually FUCK THAT, you ARE my world, you are my EVERYTHING." I didn't realise how true the words were until I said them out loud
Now we both have tears streaming down our checks as we hug each other tightly. It isn't like any hug I have experienced it is a hug that means thank you, I love you, I need you to be here and also I will live for you and with you.
VIRGIL'S POV
I have never been the best at expressing my emotions but Roman has no problem with it and the words roll of his tongue with meaning and passion. I pull away from the most welcoming hug I have ever received, I wipe his tears kiss his cheek.
"I'm sorry, I really am. Before I didn't have you and it felt as if everyone hated me and then you kissed me and started dating me but I cut because of the voice that told me it wouldn't last. Then four days ago I took an anxiety pill and then another and it was too late when I realised that it wasn't what I wanted. Now here I am, a mess, that can't eat properly, can't sleep, has a bad headache and keeps throwing up. I wanna get through this.. I'm sick and tired of feeling like absolutely garbage everyday, like no one cares and that I don't deserve anything. I love you so much and you are my world too. I promise I will try to stop Ro" I said trying and failing not to cry.
Then I got another stabbing pain and I groaned, this one wasn't as bad as the last one and I think they are starting to get better because the pills should have left my system and by tomorrow night I should be able to have dinner with the others.
I wrote a quick letter explaining that I should be joining the others tomorrow night at dinner before having some of the dinner Patton prepared for me, racing to put the letter in the kitchen and grabbed extra water and when I return to my room Ro is in his pyjamas and mine are on the bed. I put the water in the fridge before grabbing the clothes (black boxers and a short purple shirt) and heading towards the bathroom before Roman laughs to himself.
"What is so funny?" I ask genuinely curious.
"We have the same body, you realise that, yes at the moment your body might have more stories to tell then ours but I legit just saw you with no shirt on but if you are uncomfortable I will turn around. I'm not letting you in that bathroom. Not because I don't trust you, just because I know it would be hard and as your boyfriend I am to protect you!" He says while sitting in my bed phone in hand I guess he is staying tonight I don't mind that though. I quickly change where I am and get in bed as well.
He puts his phone down turns the lamp off and wraps one arm around my waist the other is around my shoulders, so that I can lay on his chest. I kiss him gently before laying my head back down on his chest.
"I love you Ro" I said quietly.
"I love you too...baby" he replies and I can feel the smirk on his face. I only chuckle, the lightly hit his chest.
"What did I tell you about that?!" I say while laughing.
"You know you love it"
Maybe I do. Then we both drift into a peaceful dream.
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Hey guys,
I hope you enjoyed! Tell me what you think about the chapter, I wasn't so sure about this one.
Take it easy FANDERS!!!
Thank you!
Bye,
Kai
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Prinxiety 💜❤️💜❤️
FanfictionCute prinxiety story. One thing left on my mind does he hate me? Do I love him?