The Year of the Pig

In the Clouds

I've asked the universe for karma but I was told not to worry and that all would come full circle

I then asked the universe for answers but I was told not to seek out what I didn't understand

I paused and then asked the universe for guidance, I was told only those of a clear heart would be guided

I then asked the universe for the meaning of happiness, I was told only those that knew peace and were guided by their heart would know happiness

I then asked the universe for peace, I was asked if it was truly peace that I sought or was it simply a release that I needed

So, I asked the universe for a release, to be relieved of all of my pain, my memories, my sadness, my heart, my soul, my joy, and my madness

The universe paused and after several moments

I was told no

The universe explained to me that if I were to be erased, to be reborn or to be restarted would mean whatever lessons I was in the process of would mean the erasure of progress

And that without progress, there wouldn't be growth to learn from those mistakes, the successes the failures, and the joys that life brings

I would essentially become trapped in a loop of unyielding self-destruction without much of a solution, nor an answer, as that is what life sometimes brings

uncompromising chaos and unconditional love

Life brings all of the aforementioned so the next generations can learn from their successes as well as from the failures of those that came before

There is no escaping failure and self-doubt, this is the absolute catalyst that makes you you, every cursor in life is unique and all shall have their moment of weakness, failure, and self-doubt

But it is truly up to you to determine how to process these occurrences and how to successfully navigate onwards on your journey through life

You are not weak for doubting yourself, you are stronger because you are aware there is a place in life where you aspire to be rather than where you are

The universe spoke to me for one last time and said to me

Never to confuse arrogance with aspiration and aspiration with ambition as they are not one and the same

Unchecked egos and arrogance are what cause renegade actions

It isn't the aspiration to be better, and it isn't the ambition to be the best but the arrogance that you are the best

I sat and thought of those parting words as I felt the universe leave my presence

I called out to the universe for what felt to be hours but in the end,

I received no further response.